


You Oughta Know

by zwischenimmerundnie



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Blow Jobs, Bottom Armie, Cheating, Closeted Character, Coming Out, Confessions, Dirty Talk, Eventual divorce, Extramarital Affairs, F/M, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Phone Sex, Rimming, Slow Burn, Smut, Top Timmy, long distance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-04
Updated: 2018-09-20
Packaged: 2019-05-01 21:19:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 55,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14529390
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zwischenimmerundnie/pseuds/zwischenimmerundnie
Summary: In one warm night in Crema, Armie and Timothée found in one another someone they could rely on, whether it was emotionally, intellectually or sexually. That night their relationship changed completely and what was once just a friendship had turned into something a little more pleasurable. Now, two years later, things are not the same as they used to be; Timothée´s revelation that he is in fact in love with Armie catches the older man by surprise and what comes next is frustration, suffering and new lovers. But the attraction between them still remains the same and the question they have to answer to themselves is: Is their relationship worth all the chaos?





	1. Mr. Duplicity

**Author's Note:**

> I´m back with a little angst, smut and fluff fic that I´ve been trying to put to work for a while now. I hope you´ll enjoy this.

“You don´t love me,” shouted Timothée through teary eyes. “But funny enough, you don´t love her either, do you? You love the idea that you have us on the palm of your hands, you love the fact that we´re always ready to run to your arms at the snap of your fingers.

You never even cared about me, did you? You just saw in me someone who was willing to give you what she would never consider; someone who would fulfill your dirty needs and take you to places you´d never been before. And for two years I allowed you to do just that; mainly because I was stupid enough to think one day you´d be all mine, that you´d actually leave her.

I´ve learned my lesson, though. You´ll never leave her and it has absolutely nothing to do with your feelings for her; it´s all about you being a fucking coward. You´re too coward to accept who you truly are; you´re scared of what others would think if they all knew you´re also into guys. You´re a thirty one year old man, who´s scared of what his mother would do if she finds out you not only like to fuck guys, but also get fucked by them.

But who am I kidding, she´ll never find out, will she? Because you´ll never be who you truly want to be; you´ll never be honest with yourself. And I feel sorry for you, Armie, I really do; but I know who I am and I´m tired of being part of the mess you created for yourself. I´m done running to you whenever you call, I´m done being you boy toy; I´m done diminishing myself because of you, Armie. I´m a good person, I don´t deserve this pain; I deserve someone who can truly appreciate me, not someone who just wants a good fuck.”

“Timothée, c´mon you…”

“I want you to go now, Armie. And please, don´t come back”

“What?!”

“You´ve heard me, Armie”

“Timothée…”

“Armie, there´s only one thing you could say right now to change my mind, but we both know you´re not gonna do it. So can you please, for once in your life, think of someone else other than yourself and just leave me alone?”

 

 

Armie woke up with a hop, his shirt drenched in sweat, his blond hair sticking to his forehead and his heart pounding so hard his chest ached. He took one long breath, trying to calm himself down as he felt a hand on his shoulder; she squeezed it softly, her body coming closer to his.

“That dream again,” she asked and Armie could tell she was worried and confused. He kept himself quiet, but nodded his head before getting out of the bed and over to the bathroom.

The reflection on the mirror was like a slap in the face; Armie had not realized how much this whole situation was taking over his mind and his body. He washed his face, took a few deep breaths and removed the drenched shirt before walking back into the room.

Elizabeth lied back down, but remained awake, eyeing his every move. Their eyes locked for a brief second, the worry in hers contrasting with the confusion of his; he put on his best fake smile –courtesy of years of acting- and made his way out of the room and down the stairs.

It had been three months since that dreadful night, three months since he had last seen Timothée, but the image of it all was still carved on his brain, hunting him every single day and night.

Armie hated to think Timothée had been right and that he was indeed a coward and selfish bastard. He had made his mistakes, there were parts of him that he was too scared to show the world, but he wasn´t the monster Timothée seemed to have made of him…or was he?

He had done nothing wrong; all that had happened between them was because they both wanted to. That one warm night in Crema, where they slept together for the first time had been a defining one to their relationship; that night, tangled on each other´s bodies and the sheets, they shared all their secrets and most deep and raw desires. That night, Armie and Timothée found in one another someone they could rely on, whether it was emotionally, intellectually or sexually.

What bugged Armie the most was the fact he had not realized anything was wrong with the brunette. He thought they were on the same page, but suddenly it all came crashing down and he was met with Timothée´s wrath.

The cool California breeze brought some life to Armie's face. He sighed, confused and scared about all the feelings that had been consuming him lately. Armie wanted to be back to normal, but he knew there would be no normal until he and Timothée talked and settled things.

_“Can´t stand this anymore. Need to talk to you”,_ he typed down, only to erase after a whole minute looking at it. Armie knew one of them would have to be the bigger man, reach out and try to sort things out, but he did not know what to say.

Hell, he didn´t even know what he felt.

 

 

*****

 

It was three in the morning in New York; the sky was mostly dark, although a few lights flickered around the big city. It was mind April and the spring weather was starting to show, mostly through less rainy days and warmer breezes.

Sitting on the apartment´s dark and cold fire escape was Timothée. He had his boxers on and on top the striped back and white sweater he had managed to steal from Armie in one of their many nights together. It didn´t smell like him anymore, but it still brought a sense of security and tenderness to Timothée that he had only felt when he was around the older man.

His chin was resting on his knees as he hugged his legs and his tired green eyes wandered around the city bellow him; he had spent hours in bed, rolling from side to side, trying his best to sleep, but it was futile. It was one of those nights again, one of those nights where nothing he did could take his thoughts away from Armie and what had happened between the two of them.

Timothée missed him, he thought of him every day and every night. He loved Armie with every single bone on his body and yet he knew he had done the right thing. As much as he wanted to be around the older man, as much as he ached for his touch, his kisses and the pleasure only he was able to provide him, Timothée knew nothing concrete would ever come out of his relationship with Armie.

He knew he had been a bit harsh at the blond that night, but Timothée was sure nothing he had said was in fact a lie. Armie didn´t love him, he didn´t love Elizabeth either, at least not anymore and he was indeed scared of who he truly was. Armie had been attracted to men ever since he was a teenager, but the fear of being rejected by his friends, his family and specially his own mother, kept him from being true to who he really was.

Timothée meant it when he said he was sorry for Armie, but he couldn´t allow Armie's fears and insecurity to dictate his own life. For months Timothée told himself that one day Armie would realize how much he actually liked him, maybe even loved, but the moment he allowed himself to see the truth, that Armie would never leave Elizabeth and risk the image he had created for himself, Timothée knew there was nothing else he could do. He had to end it all.

The sound of moving brought Timothée back to reality. Looking over his shoulder, Timothée smiled at the young brunette making its way over to him with sleepy eye. He chuckled, looking up at Jason as the man leaned against the window, his bare chest glistening as the city lights hit him.

“It´s three in the morning, Tim, what you doing up?”

“I couldn´t sleep, so I came here for a while”

“Is everything okay,” asked Jason. In his deep blue eyes a hint of worry.

“Everything´s fine, Jason, I just couldn´t sleep”

Jason ran his fingers through his thick black hair as he kneeled down, so he was at the same level as Timothée. “I can see in your eyes that there´s more than just _I can´t sleep_ , but since you clearly don´t wanna talk about it, I´ll let it slid”

Timothée smiled. He leaned closer to Jason, his arms wrapping around the brunette´s neck as he placed a soft kiss on his lips. “You know me way too well.”

“Yes I do,” said Jason, his fingers tucking a strand of hair behind Timothée´s ear. “C´mon, let´s go back to bed, you´re gonna get a cold if you stay here for too long”

Timothée nodded and followed Jason back inside. The past three months had been crazy, but at least he had found someone who cared about him. Someone who loved him.


	2. Trying To Bend The Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am completely overwhelmed by the response I got on the first chapter and I can only hope I will keep up with you expectations.   
> Also, some people were wondering how to picture Jason, so I showed [them this picture](http://raquelsantos92.tumblr.com/post/173608207103/hiiii-i-read-your-new-fic-and-wonder-whos-jason) (just imagine with blue eyes and no beard or mustache)

“Honey, I´m home”

Timothée groaned as he rolled around the bed, nestling his face in between the pillows as he heard Jason walk around the apartment. He took a few deep breaths, trying to get his eyes open as the smell of coffee started to take over the entire place. He raised his head a little, looking over his shoulder with a small smile as he watched the six foot three brunette.

Timothée sat down just as Jason made his way over to the bed with a tray in his hands. He sat down across from Timothée, a smile on his face as he saw Timothée arch an eyebrow, slightly confused.

“What have I done to deserve breakfast in bed?”

“Three months ago you finally agreed to go out with me,” said Jason. Timothée bit his lip, a soft smile on his face as he nodded his head and leaned closer, kissing Jason softly.

“That was the best decision I´ve made in a long time.”

Jason nodded. “I can agree with you on that”

Timothée laughed, his long slender fingers tangled on Jason´s dark and thick hair. “Thank you for putting up with me for the last three months; I know it hasn´t been easy”

“I know you have your struggles and your life took a path different than the one you expected; but I´m glad that I am here and that I can help you in some way.”

“You´re the best thing that happened to me lately, Jason; I need you to know that you´re very important to me.”

“I know,” he said softly as Timothée smiled. “Now, will you tell me why you were sitting at the fire escape at three in the morning?”

“Jason, I told you already, I just…”

The brunette shook his head. “Tim, you´ve been honest with me since the beginning and I love you for that, so please, don´t start lying to me now,” he said as Timothée sighed. “It was because of him?”

Timothée nodded, his green eyes suddenly a little sad and ashamed. He felt really bad at himself for making Jason go through all of this. “Yes it was, but I really don´t wanna talk about it”

“Are you sure,” asked Jason as Timothée nodded. “Okay, but if you change your mind, I´m here; I know you love him, I know you have a lot going on inside your head, but you know exactly how I feel about you and I´ll be here for you, no matter what”

Timothée´s fingers traced Jason´s pink lips. He had a small smile on his face, but his eyes were filled with tears by now. “I don´t deserve you, Jason”

“You deserve someone who loves you, Timothée, I´m just glad I´m the one to do so”

 

*****

 

Their moans filled the room. Hers were soft, low and tamed; his were loud, throaty and seemingly desperate. Every single day the differences between them seemed more and more apparent, even when they were having sex. She was quiet, he was loud; she had her eyes open, he had his closed; she thought of how lucky she was to have him, he thought of Timothée.

It was getting harder and harder for Armie to go through his life, to keep up with all the lies he had told himself and the people around him. No one but Timothée knew who he really was and now he didn´t have him to share any of his fears; Armie needed Timothée more than he had ever expected and in every single aspect of his life.

Once he pulled away from Elizabeth, panting and sweating, Armie lied back on the bed, his blue eyes stuck on the ceiling. From the corner of his eyes, he watched as she got up, her naked body making its way to the bathroom as he sighed, trashing around on the bed, trying –and failing- to get the thoughts of Timothée out of his head.

When everything happened, Armie thought it was all just a misunderstanding and that soon they would be back to their normal. But he was wrong and after three months, the distance wasn´t the worst part of it all, but the realization that he kept so much of himself hidden that only now he could see what he felt for Timothée was more than just a friendship love, more than pure and raw lust. For the first time in two years, Armie realized that deep down inside, he actually was in love with Timothée.

“Have you talked to Luca yet?”

Elizabeth´s voice startled Armie. He sat down, wrapping the sheets around his body and arched an eyebrow. “About what?”

“His fundraiser is in two days, Armie, have you RSVP?”

Armie sighed. “No I haven´t, but I´ll do it later today, I promise”

“What about Timothée, have you tried to talk to him?”

Her question hit Armie like a ton of bricks. Sure, she knew they were not on speaking terms at the moment, but she had never talked about the situation, she had barely even mentioned his name of the last three months. Why the sudden change now?

“Should I?”

When she finally turned to face him, she had a serious look on her face and Armie dreaded he should have just kept himself quiet. “Armie I understand that something serious happened between the two of you, I can also see you really don´t want to talk about it, so I have kept myself quiet about this whole situation for the past three months. Now, I need to remind you that this is Luca´s fundraiser and there´s a huge chance of Timothée being there; I don´t know about you, but I would hate to be caught up in the middle of an awkward situation in a night that is supposed to be about us having fun and helping others. So maybe, just maybe you could try and talk to him?”

Armie blinked a couple of times, his eyes locked on Elizabeth as she stood there, waiting for an answer he simply couldn´t give. There was nothing in the world he wanted more than to talk to Timothée and make things right, but he doubted Timothée felt the same way.

“Armie?”

“Elizabeth you are right, something serious happened between us and as much as I wish there was something I could do, there isn´t; so in all honestly, I see no point in trying to talk to him”

“So that´s it, you´re not even gonna try and fix it?”

“I don´t think there´s anything left to fix”

 

****

 

Armie was lying on the chair, sunglasses and short shorts on as he tried to relax in the sun. With him waking up in the middle of the night, the thoughts of Timothée during sex with Elizabeth and her conversation about the brunette, Armie was left agitated and moody. He was more than happy when Elizabeth decided to take the kids with her as she met up with some friends for a day at the spa. He needed some quiet time.

“So, are you gonna call him or not,” asked Nick.

“Call who?”

“Timothée, are you gonna call him or not?”

Armie furrowed his eyebrows. “She talked to you, didn´t she?”

“She´s worried about you, Armie. She asked if I knew what had happened between you two and honestly, I´m just as curious as her to know what could have possibly caused this…this thing between you two”

Armie took a drag of his joint, his head resting back on the chair. For years now he wished he could talk to Nick about his problems, his struggles at accepting who he really was; but even if he knew the guy since he was a kid, he was still scared of his reaction. So as always, he chose to lie.

“You two really need to let this go, okay? Just accept the fact that maybe our friendship wasn´t as strong as we all thought it was.”

“You are kidding, right,” asked Nick with an incredulous look upon his face. “In two years you guys were closer than you and I have been our entire lives, Armie.”

“That´s not true.”

Nick shook his head as he sat down straight, his dark eyes on Armie, who looked at him from behind the sunglasses. “I don´t know why you´re lying to me, but most importantly, I don´t know why you´re lying to yourself. There´s clearly something going on, you´re moody, you are distant and you get all worked up when someone mentions his name. The way I see it, you can either let it all out and go back to your usual self or you can keep doing whatever you are doing and just make yourself crazy. I´m trying to help, I really am, but you don´t make it easy.”

There was a long moment of silence. Armie was too caught up on what Nick had said to be able to say something back without breaking down completely. He took deep breaths, his hands suddenly shaking and his heart pounding on his chest. Why was it so hard for him to admit what he was feeling?

“I´m glad to know I can always count on you, Nick, but there´s absolutely nothing to talk about”

Nick shrugged, leaning back on his chair as he closed his eyes, letting out a loud sigh. “Whatever you say, Armie, when you feel like talking, I´ll be here”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Send me your feedback, comment and/or leave kudos.  
> [Follow Me On Tumblr](http://raquelsantos92.tumblr.com/)


	3. Call Out My Name

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter tittle is a The Weeknd song that can easily be a soundtrack to this fic.  
> Also, I wanted to say that this is fiction and since I have ideas to follow, I had to change the boy´s schedule a little bit.

The door closed with a loud thud, the sound reverberating throughout the dark and quiet hallway. Inside the apartment, Timothée had his back against the wall, his fingers knotted on Jason´s hair and legs tightly wrapped around his hips.

Jason kept a tight grip on Timothée´s waist, their lips attached, dancing together as they both let low moans escape them. He pulled on Timothée´s bottom lip, a little smirk on his face as Timothée thrust his hips closer to his; the friction caused Timothée to moan a little louder and his grip on Jason´s hair to tighten.

Jason wrapped his arm around Timothée as he made his way over to the bed. He hovered on top of the younger man, his lips sucking on the pale skin of his neck as his hands worked on his jeans. He tugged on the brunette´s shirt and in a swift movement pulled it off of him. He bit his lip, staring down at Timothée, who had a sweet and yet slightly sly smile on his lips.

Timothée watched as Jason lowered himself, leaving wet kisses down his slender torso just as he pushed his jeans and boxers down. He bit his lip as Jason´s hand wrapped around his already throbbing shaft, stroking it slowly; their eyes were locked, their breathing already shallow as Timothée thrust into the warm and skillful hand.

“Jason…” he practically purred. Jason smirked, loving the sounds Timothée would deliver him. He licked Timothée from his balls to the tip of his cock, smiling to himself as he heard the moans leave the brunette´s mouth. He placed a few soft and wet kisses on Timothée´s cock head, before allowing the shaft to enter his mouth.

Timothée gasped as he felt his throbbing cock enter Jason´s warm and wet mouth. They had been playing and teasing each other ever since they left the bar and now, lying naked in bed, feeling his cock go inside his boyfriend´s skillful mouth, all Timothée could do was moan. He let his fingers knot on Jason´s hair and pushed the brunette down, guiding his rhythm.

Jason moaned around Timothée´s cock and he could feel the brunette´s entire body tremble at the stimulation. He smiled to himself and let his hands travel inside Timothée´s thighs and to his balls, rolling and pulling on them as he slowly let the cock go further inside his mouth.

Timothée kept his eyes locked on Jason as he bit his lip, his back arching slightly as his body started to shiver in anticipation for the coming orgasm. Timothée slowly started to thrust faster into Jason´s mouth, the sweat already drenching his body as he felt Jason´s hand travel to his nipples, toying with them.

“F-fuck…”, hissed Timothée through clenched teeth as he tossed his head back. He closed his eyes, he could feel Jason´s tongue swirl around the swollen head of his cock and that was all it took him to break down. He moaned Jason´s name, his fingers digging into the brunette´s hair while his entire body tensed up and waves of pleasure hit him. He hissed and shuddered as he felt his cock twitch inside Jason´s mouth, filling it with his cum.

Timothée was panting, trying to get his breathing back to normal as Jason straddled him. He bit his lip, watching as the brunette removed his own shirt and unbuttoned his jeans; he let his fingers trace his boyfriend´s hard chest before pulling him down, kissing him deeply as his hands moved to Jason´s back and ass.

 

*****

 

Armie let out a laugh as he watched his kids playing. For years now he knew his kids were the only thing that grounded him, that brought him some sense of belonging; they needed him, they loved him unconditionally and they were pure, deprived of any prejudice. If everyone was like them, then maybe Armie could be himself, be honest and happy; but until that day arrived, the real Armie would remain hidden.

Maybe if Timothée was still around he could help him, guide him in some way, but he wasn´t and Armie seriously didn´t see him coming back to his life anytime soon. As he heard the front door open, Armie sighed; it was Elizabeth with her beaming voice and excited eyes. Sometimes Armie wondered if she was completely clueless to what was going on with their marriage or if she thought that by not talking about it, it wouldn´t be real.

But it was, it was as real as it could be. Their relationship had not been good even before Crema and afterwards it slowly got worst. They never discussed their problems; Armie could never tell what she was truly feeling and he knew one day all would blow up on their faces. Just like it had happened with Timothée.

Armie felt his body tense up as Elizabeth plunged herself on the couch next to him and he almost cursed at himself. This was his wife, the woman he had chosen to spend the rest of his life with and yet being this close to her did not accelerate his heart beat or aroused him, on the contrary, lately all it did was make him feel even more trapped in the lie that was his life.

“So, I was thinking we could go out tonight. Just the two of us, having a nice wine and a meal,” she started as Armie bit his lip. “I talked to the babysitter and she´s free… or we could always call Nick”

“Elizabeth, I just…”

“Look, I know you´ve been moody lately and that there´s clearly something bugging you, but I think it would be good for both of us if we did this. You know, just like old times.”

Armie sighed. It had been months, maybe even years since he saw such a vulnerable side of Elizabeth and what she suggested was probably the closest to her admitting they had problems. He just couldn´t say no.

“Sure let´s go, I´m sure it´s gonna be fun”

Her smile was one the biggest one he had seen lately and years ago it would have made him smile too. “That´s great, I´ll go give the kids a bath and then go get myself ready”

He nodded, watching as she took Ford in her arms and leaded Harper over to the stairs. He leaned his head back on the cushions, his brain working on overdrive as he tried to figure out what to do with his life.

“Oh, I almost forgot. I called Luca and confirmed our presence at the fundraiser”

Armie quickly sat up straight, looking back at Elizabeth with wide eyes. “Excuse me?”

“The fundraiser is tomorrow night, Armie”

“I know it is, but I´m not sure if I want to go”

“And why not?”

Her voice changed, her tone was subtly more aggressive and Armie knew it well. He kept his eyes locked on hers as she waited for an answer, but again, as it had happened constantly, he did not have one.

“Just forget it.”

 

*****

 

Timothée had the striped sweater on as he lied in bed, his arms tightly wrapped around Jason´s torso. He felt like a douchebag for wearing something that belonged to Armie while he was with his boyfriend, but at the same time he simply couldn´t help himself.

He knew he didn´t deserve someone like Jason, someone so understanding and loving. When he told what had happened between him and Armie, Timothée was certain the young man would run away from him, but no, Jason listened to him and tried to understand him.

“Hey, what´s going on?”

“Huh,” mumbled Timothée as he looked up at Jason.

“You´re very, very quiet”

“It´s called seizing the moment, Jason”

Jason chuckled, his grip around Timothée tightening as he leaned down for a kiss. Timothée smiled, straddling Jason as he deepened the kiss, his hands cupping his boyfriend´s face just as he heard his phone vibrate.

He groaned, nestling his face on the crook of Jason´s neck as the brunette chuckled. He reached for the phone, his eyes scanning the screen as he bit his lip.

Jason arched an eyebrow as he saw Timothée´s gleaming green eyes turn into apprehensive ones. With a tight grip on Timothée´s hips, Jason moved to a sitting position; he kept his blue eyes on his boyfriend as his hands moved up to his shoulders, massaging slowly.

“Tim, what´s wrong?”

Timothée bit his lip, taking a few deep breaths before he could actually say anything. “Luca has a fundraiser tomorrow night and he´s been asking me to go for a few days now”

“Okay, that´s good news”

“Yes, it is”

“So why are you nervous?”

“The fundraiser is in Los Angeles”

Jason remained quiet for a few seconds, processing what Timothée had said. “And you´re scared that Armie will be there too, right?” Timothée simply nodded, his eyes locked on Jason´s. “Well, you don´t have to go if you don´t want to, I´m sure Luca will understand. But the way I see it, you shouldn´t deprive yourself from doing what you like, from being around the people you love because of Armie.”

“I know that, but I don´t think I am ready for a confrontation”

“Tim, it´s not gonna be easy, that´s for sure. But you and Armie work on the same business, you have friends in common, so you will…well actually, _we will_ have to accept the fact that one day you´ll have to see him again. And if you think about it, a party is the best place for it; too many people around for anyone to make a scene.”

Timothée shook his head as he allowed a small smile to take over his lips; it seemed like Jason always knew exactly what to say to make him feel better. He let his hands run inside the brunette´s sweater, rubbing his chest slowly. “Would you go with me?”

“You´re crazy if you think I´ll let you do this on your own,” said Jason with a smile as Timothée chuckled, leaning down to place a quick kiss on his lips.

“Guess we´re going to Los Angeles then”

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Follow Me On Tumblr](http://raquelsantos92.tumblr.com/)


	4. Homemade Dynamite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It´s Mother´s day weekend and the whole family is gathering, so I probably won´t be able to upload for a few days, so I thought I´d give you all a treat, since you seem to really enjoy this one. Let the fundraiser begin....

Armie let out a puff, the smoke filling the air as he sat down on the grass, his back against the wall. In less than twelve hours he would be face to face with Timothée once again; on his head, the only thought was how the brunette would react to seeing him. Would he give Armie the chance to say anything?

The three months of radio silence between them had been the most miserable months of Armie's whole life, yet he couldn´t deny being away from Timothée caused him to rethink a lot of aspects of his life; it allowed him to access and get a better understanding of everything he felt for the younger man.

But Armie knew he still had a long way to go. He loved Timothée, he knew that by now, but he still had so many issues inside of him, so many demons to slay. He was a bisexual man, who spent more than twelve years of his life hiding himself, suppressing his desires and emotions because he was scared.

Whenever he thought of coming out, of being true to himself, all Armie could see was his mom, Bible in hand, intense brown eyes locked on him, judgment all over her face. The only thing he had ever done in life that she had agreed with was marrying Elizabeth. Armie couldn´t even imagine how she would react if she knew the whole truth.

 _You are a failure._ Armie thought to himself as he got up, making his way inside the house. He rushed up the stairs, groaning as he entered the room and saw his suit lying perfectly on the bed alongside Elizabeth´s dress. It would be one hell of a night, of that he was sure.

 

****

 

_Are you coming tonight?_

Armie had stared at the message for several minutes before he actually hit send. He had pondered if this was the right thing to do, he had feared that he wouldn´t get a reply and that´s exactly what happened. After four hours without an answer, Armie knew there was probably no point in trying to fix anything. Timothée was done with him; he should just accept it once for all.

Armie couldn´t deny that a part of him thought this actually made things easier; with Timothée gone, maybe he could focus his attention back on his marriage, try to make it all work. Of course that also meant he would have to keep up with the lies and Armie wasn´t sure he could do that for much longer.

“Armie! Armie!”

He snapped out of his thoughts, his blue eyes wandering from the phone in his hands to Elizabeth, who had a worried look on her face.

“I´ve been calling you for a minute now, are you okay?”

He nodded. “I´m fine”

“Okay, then get up and start getting ready”

“Do we really have to go,” asked Armie as he got up from the bed, stretching himself.

“Of course we gotta go, you promised Luca you´d be there”

Armie sighed, shaking his head. “No I didn´t; you called him behind my back and said we were going”

“Only because you wouldn´t do it”

Armie rubbed his face, frustration taking over him. “And did you consider for even a second that I didn´t reach out to him because I didn´t want to go?”

“And why is that Armie,” she asked, taking a step closer to him. “Why are you suddenly so worried about this fundraiser that you´re willing on bail on Luca?”

“Elizabeth it´s just a fucking fundraiser, he´ll understand”

“Stop cursing!”

Armie rolled his eyes, his fingers knotting on his short hair as he took a deep breath. “It´s just a fundraiser, I can call him and explain everything. Then tomorrow the three of us could go out to dinner or he could come here and spend the day with us.”

“I told him we are going, Armie, so unless you can tell me the exact reason why you´re so reluctant, we are going”

“Elizabeth, I´m not in the mood. Isn´t that enough?”

“That´s the problem, Armie, lately you haven´t been in the mood for anything”

As Elizabeth stormed out of the bedroom, slamming the door behind her, Armie plunged himself back to the bed. So much for trying to make the marriage work.

 

****

 

_Are you coming tonight?_

The sun was starting to set, a mix of dark blue and orange filling the sky as Timothée stood on the balcony; he was leaning against the rail, his eyes staring at the message for a long five minutes. He had absolutely no idea of what to do with himself as he read the words over and over again. The whole situation had been stressful enough as it was and he was still unsure going to the fundraiser was a going idea. The last thing he needed was Armie reaching out, trying to break the ice and make amends.

Timothée didn´t even know if he wanted to make amends.

After three months, Timothée was finally feeling like himself again and he could actually picture a life for him that did not revolve around Armie Fucking Hammer. Armie had hurt him deeply, even if that wasn´t his intention and after a period of sadness and confusion, he had found in Jason someone who loved him and understood him. What was the point in indulging in the older man´s games now?

With a heavy sigh, Timothée took one last and long look at the message before he deleted it. He bit his lip, his heart aching for him to reach out, but his brain knowing quite well he was doing the right thing. There was no happy ending for him and Armie.

He rubbed his face, trying to recompose himself and made his way back inside the fancy hotel room. He tossed the phone on the bed just as the bathroom door opened. He looked up, a big smile coming to his lips at the sight of the brunette.

Jason only had a towel wrapped around himself as he walked to the room, his naked torso glistening with water, his damp black hair falling down his face and his deep blue eyes were relaxed and loving. Timothée simply stared at him for a couple of seconds before he made his way over; he wrapped his arms around Jason´s waist, his long slender fingers tracing his boyfriend´s spine.

Timothée let their lips touch briefly as he pressed himself closer to Jason´s semi-naked body. The brunette had his hands sprawled on Timothée´s back as he let out a low moan through their pressed lips. Timothée smiled, proud of himself for inflicting this kind of reaction on the man.

“I was just about to join you,” whispered Timothée on Jason´s ear.

“Thank God you didn´t, or else we´d be late”

Timothée chuckled, placing kisses down Jason´s neck. “I think Luca has a lot on his plate to care about us being late”

“Tiiiiim,” purred Jason, his hands tightly holding onto Timothée´s waist. “Don´t tease me”

Timothée bit his lip seductively as his hand tugged on the knot of the towel and pulled on it, letting the fabric fall to the ground. Jason let his hand slid down to the back of Timothée´s thighs and pulled him up. Timothée gladly wrapped his legs around Jason´s hips, their groins rubbing together as Jason lead them to the bathroom.

Timothée´s lips quickly found its way back to Jason´s neck, kissing and sucking on it, but his eyes couldn´t leave the phone that lied on the bed. The message Armie had sent him had been erased from it, but it was still engraved on his brain.

 

****

 

It was a cool starry night in Los Angeles, sitting on the steps at the back door was Armie, a distant look on his eyes, a joint dangling from his lips. He could hear the chatter, the laughs and the good Italian music; he had tried to put a smile on his face, to engage with the other guests, but he couldn´t.

Luca had realized something was wrong the minute they came eye to eye, but Armie dodged all the questions. It wasn´t the time nor the place for them to talk about Armie's problems, but he knew Luca was someone he could trust; Luca was probably the only person –aside from Timothée- that wouldn´t judge him.

He took one long drag, resting his head back on the wall just as he heard the door open. He looked to his side, sighing as he saw Elizabeth standing there, a mad look on her face. “Seriously, can´t you stay away from that for just one night? People can smell it, you know?”

“I didn´t even want to be here, Liz,” he said. He could see her face turn even more serious at the sound of the nickname she hated so much. “I told you I didn´t want to come, but you forced me anyway; so can I please have a moment to relax before I can actually go back in there and face those people again? Can you grant me that much?”

Elizabeth sighed. She was tired and confused; she had tried to understand Armie, to figure out what was happening with him, but nothing she did was good enough. “Luca was looking for you; he wanted to introduce you to some of his friends”

“Oh…, I´ll be there right away”

“Okay,” was all she said as she turned on her heels, about to walk back inside. When she heard Armie call out her name, Elizabeth stopped, took one long breath and looked over her shoulder, her brown eyes on his blue ones.

“I´m sorry,” he practically whispered. “I´ve been all over the place, drowned in my own problems and I know I shouldn´t be taking out on you. I really am sorry”

Elizabeth blinked a couple of times, before she shook her head. “This is not the place for us to talk about this, Armie. When we get home, if you´re still in the mood, then we can try and discuss this, but I´m not gonna do this here. Not when there´s a room full of people looking at us”

Armie kept himself quiet and simply nodded. Their eyes remained on one another for a few seconds before Armie looked down; he put out his joint, buried his face in his hands and took a few deep breaths. Armie knew he was the only one to blame for all of this; he was the one who hurt Timothée and now he was hurting Elizabeth. He did not do it for fun, like Timothée had implied; no, things had just got out control and he was left in the middle, confused and hurting everyone he cared about.

The silence lingered and for a second Armie thought she had already left. He looked up and to his side, their gaze meeting once again as she bit her lip and stepped inside again. “I almost forgot,” she said, her voice barely a whisper. “Timothée is here”

Armie's eyes widened and his body stiffened. He knew this could happen, but had prayed that the brunette wouldn´t show up. He had absolutely no idea of what to say or even if he should actually say something; how much did Timothée hate him? Would they spend the entire night avoiding one another?

He inhaled deeply as he got up. He wouldn´t be able to run away from this situation, so he would face it the best way he could. Armie ran his fingers through his hair, fixed his suit and walked back inside; he made his way down a long corridor until he reached the ballroom, his eyes instantly searching the room.

Armie saw Luca, he saw Elizabeth by the bar, talking with some of her friends and then he saw him. His dark curls fell down his face; his reddish lips were curved in a small smile as he stood on the other side of the room, wearing a dark green suit that matched his eyes. Armie tried, but he couldn´t suppress the smile that appeared on his lips at the sight of Timothée.

It was at that exact moment that something ignited inside of Armie and he realized he would do anything he could to get their relationship back to normal. To get Timothée back into his life.

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Confessions Of A Broken Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie and Timothée are finally reunited. What could possibly go wrong?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The feedback I am getting from you guys is overwhelming and now I know I gotta step up my game to make sure I deliver something worth it. Thanks for all the support. <3

He never knew if it was because of his looks, his background or if he was that good of an actor, but Armie knew he had always been seen as an overly confident man.   It was borderline comical for him to hear those things, especially when deep inside of him, Armie didn´t even know who he really was.

If those people could see him now, leaning against the wall, chugging yet another glass of champagne as his blue eyes roamed around the room, always searching for Timothée, they would probably laugh at him. The brunette had been there for at least two hours, but Armie still hadn´t found enough courage in him to go over and talk to him.

To be fair, Armie didn´t know what to say to Timothée. Should he just apologize? What was the protocol to approach the guy you used to have an affair with after three months of complete radio silence?

Well, until Armie could actually answer those questions –or until he was drunk enough not to care about any of them- he decided to remain far away and just observe as Timothée walked around, laughing and being his usual enchanting self.

On the last two hours, their eyes had met twice and in both of them Armie had smiled, a subtle but desperate attempt to engage in some way. His attempts though were futile; Timothée kept himself serious on both occasions and quickly adverted his eyes from Armie.

“Armie!”

At the sound of his name being called, Armie looked to his side, putting on his best fake smile as he made his way over to Dev. It was time to put on the Hollywood Star facade and lie the night away. And at that, Armie was really good at.

 

****

 

“Why are you sitting here so quiet,” asked Timothée. He sat next to Jason, handing the brunette a glass of champagne; he let his hand rest on Jason´s thigh, rubbing it slowly as Jason shrugged his shoulders, a little smile on his face.

“You are the one in the business, Tim, you´re the one who has to go around and mingle. Besides, I didn´t want to interrupt any important conversations”

Timothée squeezed his thigh, “you never interrupt, Jason”

Jason smiled, his hand now resting on top of Timothée´s. “So, have you see him?”

“Kind of hard not to,” said Timothée as Jason chuckled. “I don´t plan on talking to him, though”

“Why not?”

“I´m actually having fun here, Jason and the last thing I need is the drama that comes with Armie. But Elizabeth actually came over to talk”

“The wife,” asked Jason as Timothée nodded. “How did it go?”

“She said she misses me and that whatever happened between Armie and me shouldn´t interfere on my relationship with her…or the kids.” Timothée chuckled; “it would actually be funny if it wasn´t tragic”

“Maybe she knows something and this is her way of keeping you close, keep an eye on you”

Timothée laughed, shaking his head. “You don´t know Elizabeth, Jason, she is a jealous woman. I have seen her get crazy over women who would hit on Armie, so believe me, if she had any idea of what Armie and I did, she´d be doing anything to get me as far away from him as possible”

Jason remained silent for a second, his thumb brushing Timothée´s hand softly; he bit his lip, his blue eyes intensively looking at Timothée, who arched an eyebrow. “Should I be doing the same?”

“Jason, you know how I feel about him and you know everything that happened between us, but I need you to know that you and I, our relationship, is not just for the kicks or anything. I´m happy with you and I plan on doing whatever I can to make you feel as loved as you make me feel. Besides, Armie is still the same, whatever we had is over, there´s no going back.”

Timothée knew in some way his words were nothing but lies. One of the main reasons why he wanted to stay away from Armie was because he wasn´t sure he could control himself around the blond; the feelings inside of him were still too real, too strong.

 

****

 

The ballroom wasn´t as crowded as it was before. Alone in table at the middle of the room, was an extremely bored Armie. Elizabeth had gone off with some of her friends to talk about God knows what; it made him wonder why the need for him to go if they had barely been together the entire night.

He bit his lip as his eyes landed on Timothée yet once again. He was on the other side of the room, back against the wall as he smiled and laughed at something a tall brunette said to him. Armie couldn´t see the man´s face, but it was clear to him that he and Timothée were close, intimate even. He couldn´t help but feel a shiver run down his spine at the thought of that, which actually made him chuckle; Armie had never been the jealous kind and yet, Timothée seemed to bring that side of him out.

The second the tall brunette walked away, he saw Timothée reach for his pockets, as if searching for something and then quickly made his way down the hallway, the same one Armie had walked through hours before. He knew exactly what he was going to do and so, Armie took this as his opportunity; he had absolutely no idea when –or if- he would see Timothée again, so he would take a leap of faith and try his best to make something good out of that dreadful night.

He took a couple of deep breaths, chugged yet another glass of champagne and got up, taking the same hallway Timothée had. When he reached the door, it was slightly ajar and for a brief second, Armie wondered if Timothée had left it on purpose; was this an invitation of some kind? Maybe a peace offer?

Armie stepped out, ironically standing on the exact same spot Elizabeth stood hours prior while talking to him. He shook that thought away and let his gaze fall on Timothée; Armie had his hand in his pocket, his lips tightly pressed together as he tried to come up with something to say.

Timothée remained quiet as he put the joint on his lips, taking a long drag out of it, before exhaling the smoke. He tried to keep himself cool, to hold himself together, despite the body that stood just a feet behind him; he never looked back, he didn´t need that to know who it was. His presence, his body heat, his scent; it was all still engraved deep inside of him.

They remained there for a couple of minutes, no word was shared and as much as he wanted to be strong and fight all his urges, Timothée knew if he stood there for too long things would end up bad. He put out the join and turned to leave, his eyes down, never meeting Armie's; he couldn´t dare to do so.

Armie took a hold of Timothée´s arm before he could reach the door and pulled him back slightly. He could feel the brunette´s body stiffen at his touch, which involuntarily brought a small smile too his face. Whether Timothée hated him or not, it was clear to Armie he still had some kind of effect on him.

“Armie…”, Timothée practically whispered.

“We have to talk, Timmy, please”

Timothée shook his head, his eyes finally meeting Armie's. “There´s nothing left to talk, Armie. It´s over”

“How can you say that, Timothée? We were toge-”, he stopped abruptly. For some reason saying the actual word seemed too much for Armie to handle. “What we had wasn´t a stupid little thing we can just push back and pretend it never happened, Timothée”

“Pretend it never happened,” asked Timothée incredulous. “I don´t know about you Armie, but I think about us every single day of my life; every little thing I do still reminds me of you. You think the last three months have been easy for me? You think what I did was an easy choice to make? Well, let me tell you, Armie, it wasn´t. I had been lying to myself for months, telling myself everything would be okay, but then I realized that us, what we had, would never end well”

Armie rubbed his face, a heavy sigh leaving him as he tried to process everything Timothée had just said. “I…I didn´t mean that”

“You never do, Armie”, said Timothée, a soft smile on his lips as he felt his eyes start to water. “With you it´s always _sorry_ or _I didn´t mean that_ or _that wasn´t I was trying to say_ ; with you I´m always second guessing everything and I can´t live my life like that. No matter how much I love you, Armie, I can´t go through all of this anymore; I´m broken and tired and I, well, I deserve better”

“I never meant to hurt you”

“Maybe not, but you did it anyway”

“Timmy…”

“Armie, there´s absolutely nothing left to say between us. What we had it´s over and that´s it, there´s no going back.” Timothée sighed, all the pain he had boiled up inside of him was trying to get out and if he stayed there any longer he would end up saying things he did not mean.

“C´mon, Timothée…”

“Armie, it´s over! Go back to the lie you call marriage and please, let me try and move on”

Armie felt a lump on his throat; Timothée´s words had hit a bit too close to home. His eyes suddenly moved down to the floor, shame taking over him as he tried to find the right words to make it all better.

He was well aware he did not deserve Timothée´s forgiveness, but he would fight for it anyway. As he opened his mouth, about to say something, Armie heard the door open behind him; he looked back and arched an eyebrow, staring at the man who stood there.

It took Armie a few seconds, but he then recognized the clothes; it was the tall man who was previously talking to Timothée. The man who –unlike him- was making him smile and laugh.

“There you are. I´ve been looking for you everywhere,” said Jason as he walked over to Timothée. “Are you okay,” he asked concerned once he noticed the tears on Timothée´s eyes.

“Yes, I´m fine”

“Are you sure,” he asked once again as Timothée nodded.

“Hi,” interrupted Armie, standing his hand out as Jason turned to him. “I don´t think we´ve met before, I´m Armie”. Armie had his best fake smile plastered on his lips as he shook hands with Jason. His move had nothing to do with politeness; all he wanted was to figure out who that guy was.

“I know who you are,” said Jason with a smile. “I´m Jason, Timothée´s boyfriend. It´s a _pleasure_ to finally meet you”

Armie suddenly felt his entire body stiffen and his hands sweat. He knew the realization this man was Timothée´s boyfriend should be his main problem, but there was something on his tone that caught Armie off guard. He clearly knew everything him and Timothée had gone through.

Timothée bit down hard on his lip as he looked at Armie and Jason. He would be lying if he said he had not dreaded this encounter; Jason was a great man and was okay with everything he knew about him and Armie, but to be face to face with the who could easily be called his antagonist, that could mess up with him and honest to God, Timothée didn´t want that.

He let his hand rest on Jason´s arm, a warm smile on his lips as the man turned to him. “Can we go now? This jet-lag is killing me and I could use some sleep”

Jason nodded, wrapping his arm around Timothée´s waist. “Again, it was a _pleasure_ to finally meet you, Armie”, he said and Armie simply nodded.

As they walked away, Armie felt like he finally could breathe again. It hurt him to see Timothée so mad at him, but it hurt even more to see him try and move on. Armie wouldn´t give up on him though, not now he knew he loved him.

 

 

 

 


	6. A Matter of Feeling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie and Timothée get a chance to talk once again and things get a little interesting....

Armie was sitting on one of the kitchen stools, his eyes lost as he moved the fork around his plate. All he could think about was his encounter with Timothée the previous night; the way Timothée looked at him, the tears in his eyes as he spoke, it hurt Armie deeply. Of course that was not the worst part, nothing had prepared him for Jason, for the way the man wrapped his arm around Timothée´s waist and looked at him; that was what truly destroyed Armie, because he could see in that brief moment that the man loved Timothée and unlike him, Jason had no problem acknowledging  his love. Jason wanted the world to know about his feelings for Timothée, while Armie remained quiet.

In a strange way, Armie felt ashamed with himself for even being jealous of Timothée. The brunette was simply trying to live his life, move on and recover from the pain Armie had inflicted on him for so long. Armie had absolutely no right to be mad at anyone but himself.

“Good morning,” said Elizabeth as she made her way into the kitchen. She wrapped her arms around him, placing a soft and quick kiss on his cheek before she made her way to the stove, pouring herself some coffee. Her eyes landed back on Armie, who was almost lost in thought once again. “I got a call from Dallas, I might have to spend the weekend there taking care of some things at the bakery”

“Is everything okay?”

“Yes, nothing major but I want to go and check it out myself”

Armie nodded. “You want me to go with you,” he asked, even if leaving Los Angeles right now was the last thing he planned on doing. He had talked to Luca and the man told him Timothée was still in town and Armie wouldn´t let him leave without trying to talk to him at least one more time.

“No need to. You stay here and try to relax a little bit. I´ll take the kids with me, maybe we can stay with your mother for the weekend.”

Armie nodded but felt a shiver run down his spine. He was aware it was a horrible thought, but whenever his kids spent too much time with his mother, he feared she would do to them the exact same thing she had done to him during his entire childhood. Armie would never let things go that far, though, he would protect his kids.

“That´s a great idea”, he lied. “I´m sure she´ll love to see them”

Elizabeth bit her lip as she made her way to Armie; she leaned against the marble counter, a comforting look on her eyes. “Are you okay? You seemed a little off after the fundraiser…even worse than you were before, to be quite frankly.”

“I was just tired,” he said with a small smile on his lips. “Why don´t you have your breakfast, I´ll go get the kids ready and pack some clothes for them”

“Thank you,” she said just as Armie walked away. It was clear to Elizabeth that it wasn´t just tiredness that had consumed Armie the previous night; something was going on with him and as much as she tried, she still couldn´t wrap her fingers around it. And to be honest, she hated that.

 

****

 

_‘You had the cutest smile on your face and I know you hate running, so I thought it would be better to let you sleep._

_I promise I won´t get lost._

_Love, Jason’_

A wide smile spread across Timothée´s face as he read the note. It was a simple, but tender and loving note; not the first and definitely not the last one Jason would leave him.

The man had truly been Timothée´s rock on the last three months, the one thing that kept him from going insane, from drowning in pain. Timothée could only wish one day he would be able to love Jason the way he deserved.

With a smile still plastered on his lips, Timothée placed the note back on the nightstand and languidly moved his naked body over to the bathroom. He let the cold water hit him, washing away any left traces of sleep as well as any thoughts of the previous night.

Once dried and clothed, Timothée left a note to Jason and made his way out of the room. The lobby was crowded, a few young girls rushing over to him, asking for photos and autographs. With a smile on his face, Timothée gladly attended everyone, taking his time with each fan; he wanted some time to himself before meeting up with Jason again, but he would never leave anyone hanging. Those people were probably waiting for him for a while and they deserved some attention.

As he finally made his way out of the hotel, Timothée spotted a small coffee shop just on the other side of the street and decided to grab something to drink, before he could wander around the streets of Los Angeles. Just as he was about to make his way over, Timothée heard a voice echo on the street. He knew that voice way too well; the way it carried his name would forever be engraved on his mind and on his heart.

He took a few deep breaths, his hands suddenly sweating and his heart already beating faster as he tried to figure out what to do; he could simply keep on walking, pretend he hadn´t heard him or he could face him and get this all over with. He turned around slowly, biting his lip as he saw Armie standing there. The man had a small smile on his face, but his body language let Timothée know he was uncomfortable, perhaps even unsure if he should actually be there.

Armie had his walls down and Timothée had barely had the chance to see that side of him.

“What are you doing here?”

“I want us to finish what we started yesterday, that´s what I want”

He sighed, “Armie, please”

“Timothée, I´m not asking for much. All I want from you right now is a few minutes for us to talk and maybe settle everything. Can you please grant me this?”

Timothée stared at him for a couple of seconds, his brain going on overdrive.  “Fine, we can go upstairs and talk”

Armie arched an eyebrow. “You mean on your hotel room?”

“I don´t think this is the kind of conversation you´d like to have on a very public place, right?” Armie nodded and Timothée turned on his heels, making his way back inside the hotel.

As he walked in front of Armie, Timothée could feel the older man´s eyes on his back, preying on him like he had done so many times before. Timothée hated to admit, but he felt a shiver run down his spine.

 

****

 

It was a slightly awkward situation to be honest. They were both quiet, sitting on the edge of the bed, knees almost touching. If it was for Armie, he would jump on Timothée, kiss him, touch him, claim his body as the brunette moaned a low and husky _I love you_ on his ear. As much as he wanted that fantasy to become a reality, Armie remained still; he wanted to show Timothée he could be different, that he wasn´t the complete douchebag the brunette thought he was.

“Armie…” Timothée´s voice was practically a whisper, a plea for the blond to say something already. He couldn´t stand the silence any longer.

“I´m sorry,” started Armie as Timothée sighed. “I need you to know I never meant to hurt you, Timmy. I didn´t realize you had actual feelings for me until that night and I was confused and overwhelmed. We had agree that what we had was just about sex and when that whole thing happened, I just didn´t know what to do or say. I need you to understand that the past three months have not been easy for me either. I miss you more than I could have ever expected; I need you in my life, Timothée.”

Timothée nodded. “Of course you do; you need me to fulfill your desires”

“No no, it´s much more than that. Timothée, you are my best friend, the only person who truly knows me, the only one I can talk to”

“Armie, I understand that you are scared of letting the world know who you really are, I know you scared of your family´s reaction, but I can´t be the person who´ll sit around and wait until you decide it´s okay to be yourself. You are in a loveless marriage for God knows how long, cause to you it seems easier to keep living a lie than to face the world and be happy with...”, Timothée didn´t finish his sentence. He wanted to say _be happy with me_ , but he couldn´t find the guts to do it.

Armie looked down at his hands as he bit his lip. He was scared and that wasn´t up to discussion anymore, but his true feelings for Timothée weren´t either, so why couldn´t he just look him in the eye and say he loved him? Was it because saying it out loud would make it all too real and he knew he still wasn´t ready to face that reality? Or was it because he wasn´t sure saying those words would change their current situation?

When Armie finally dared to look back up, Timothée was looking at him with tender eyes and a comforting expression. Armie tried but he couldn´t help but lean closer to him; it had been too long since they found themselves in a moment like this one. He could feel Timothée´s hot breathing on his face as he watched the brunette´s eyes wander from his eyes to his lips.

They wanted the exact same thing, it was clear for him now.

Timothée feel his heart beat accelerate, his body was on fire already and his hands were sweating. Armie's face was so close to his, their noses were brushing together and from the corner of his eyes he could see Armie's hands moving; would he hold onto his waist and bring their bodies close or would he cradle his face and brush his soft finger against his cheek?

He went for his cheek, his large and warm hand softly touching his skin after such a long time; Timothée couldn´t help but lean in to his touch as he closed his eyes, taking in a few deep breaths. As Armie's thumb brushed close to his lips, Timothée felt his body tremble and suddenly all he wanted was to push the man closer and smash their lips together, devour him with a force he didn´t even know he had.

Armie's lips were practically on his when Timothée heard the door. Suddenly he was brought back to reality; he had almost kissed Armie and Jason was just about to get inside the room. Timothée couldn´t even believe how fast he moved, but quickly he found himself getting up and moving away from the bed, away from Armie.

“Armie?”

Was the first thing Jason said as he stepped inside the hotel room and saw the blond sitting by the bed. He looked over at Timothée, a small smile on his lip as his boyfriend did the exact same thing.

“Armie wanted to finish yesterday´s conversation, but he was just about to leave. Right, Armie?”

Armie nodded as he slowly got up. “Yes, I was just leaving. Thank you for talking to me, Timothée”, he said as the brunette nodded. “It´s a pleasure to see you again, Jason”

Jason nodded. “Right back at ya”

As Timothée opened the door for Armie, Jason watched them carefully. They didn´t touch, neither got close to one another and yet the look on their eyes said everything it needed to be and Jason, well, Jason didn´t really want to admit it, but it was as clear as water. He did not stand a chance.

 

 

 


	7. My Power, My Pleasure, My Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Our boys meet once again and Armie tries to finish what they started early that morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did say this was a slow burn, right? Our boys are messed up and things will get messy before they can get good, but when they get good, oh it will be really good. ;)

The Bistro was located in a secluded corner close to Beverly Hills. The place had a vintage vibe to it that made Timothée remember his summers in France when he was young. Ever since he found out about that place, he couldn´t go to California and not stop by and of course that meant paparazzi always knew where to find him.

The three or four men that had spent the last hour taking photos of him and Jason didn´t go by unnoticed by him, although he chose not to give them any attention. In fact all his attention was focused on Jason, who had been quiet for the last few hours. Timothée wished he didn´t know why he was acting like this, but he did and he was feeling horrible with himself.

He reached for Jason´s hand, which was resting on the table and gave it a little squeeze. “Are you okay? Do you wanna talk?”

Jason gave him a small smile as he intertwined their fingers together. He could see the worry on Timothée´s eyes and sighed; of course he got caught off guard when he saw Armie at their hotel room, but he would not let that bug him. “I´m okay, you don´t have to worry about me”

Timothée gave him a look, not really believing him, but since he clearly didn´t want to talk, he would change the subject. “Luca invited us for dinner tonight, at the hotel he is staying”

“Okay, that´s fine by me”

“You sure? Yesterday you mentioned something about us going out tonight and if you rather…”

Jason chuckled, kissing Timothée´s hand as the brunette bit his lip. “We came here because of Luca and if he wants to spend more time with you, that´s fine by me. Besides, we´re going back to New York tomorrow morning and we can spend as many nights together as we want”

“Okay then, I´ll call him and let him know we´re going”

 

****

 

The music was loud and filled the entire house. On the living room, sitting on the floor was Armie; he had a wide smile on his face as he replayed over and over again the events of the morning.

When he left his house to go and try to talk to Timothée, he had created a variety of scenarios inside his head, but neither one of them came close to what had actually happened between them.

The proximity of their bodies, Timothée´s hot breathing on his face and the way the brunette´s lips quivered at the anticipation for the kiss. That fraction of a moment was all Armie needed to know he still had a chance with Timothée; even if the brunette was hurt, even if right now he hated him, Armie knew that there was still so much love and want inside of him that if he tried, eventually he and Timothée would have a chance to restart their story.

“Oh, so you are alive”

Armie looked over his shoulder, furrowing his eyebrows as Nick made his way over to him. “What are you talking about?”

“I spent the entire morning trying to talk to you, man”

“Oh sorry, I was with Timothée”

Nick arched an eyebrow. “So you two finally talked?”

“I´ve tried to talk to him yesterday night, but it was no use. So I went over to his hotel today to see if we could try to fix all this mess”

“And did you?”

Armie bit his lip and shook his head. “No we didn´t. We were actually having a very nice and civilized conversation, things seemed to be going a good direction, but his boyfriend showed up and we had to stop”

Nick nodded, looking at Armie from the corner of his eyes. “So since things seem to be going a good direction between you, will you tell me exactly why you two had a fight? Because I still can´t understand what could have possibly happened between you two for everything to go downhill so easily”

“Nick, there are things I really don´t feel like talking about, okay? I just…I´m not comfortable talking about this”

“You´re not comfortable? Armie, seriously, what the hell happened between you two that makes you uncomfortable to talk to me?”

“God, you´re sounding like Elizabeth now,” he mumbled as Nick rolled his eyes. “Things happened between Timothée and I, it was serious and it was painful, that´s all you need to know”

“Why you keep lying to me? Why you keep hiding things from me when you know I will be here for you no matter what”

Armie looked down at his hands, fidgeting with his fingers as he let out a breath. God, he felt bad for not being able to talk to Nick; the man had been around him for his entire life and had done absolutely nothing that could lead Armie to think he would be one of those people to turn their back on him, to hate him and mock him if they found out the truth. Yet, not matter how much he tried, he couldn´t open himself to him.

“I´m sorry, Nick, I really am. I don´t mean to make you feel bad or make you think that you´re not a good friend, cause you are. I´m the one with issues and I can´t seem to find the strength to talk…and it´s not just with you, I can´t seem to talk to anyone”

“Armie, how serious are those issues?”

“I haven´t murdered anyone if that´s what you´re thinking”, he said with a chuckle as Nick rolled his eyes. “Is serious enough for me not to be the person I want to be…or should be”

“Look, whatever this is, I am sure you can tell me”

“I know I can tell you, Nick. But I can´t let it out. I´m the problem here, not you”

There was a moment of silence between them; their eyes locked on one another, Armie showing nothing but sadness and pain, while Nick was filled with apprehension.

“Whenever you feel like you´ve gained enough courage to talk about this let me know and I´ll be here”

“I know”, he said with a smile. “Now, can we please change the subject to something a little more fun?”

Nick laughed, nodding his head as Armie chuckled. “Oh yeah, I think we both need it”

 

****

 

“Mmmmhh…”, mumbled Timothée between pressed lips. He let out a little chuckled as he pressed his hands on Jason´s chest, pushing him away. “We´re gonna be late, Jason”

Jason smirked, wrapping his arms around Timothée´s waist as he pulled him back to him, pressing their bodies together once again. “You didn´t seem to mind about being late yesterday”, he mumbled as he let his lips trace Timothée´s neck.

The brunette laughed, his fingers now knotted on Jason´s hair. “He wasn´t all alone yesterday, Jason, today he will be”, he said in between low moans. He closed his eyes for a second, letting Jason have his way with him before he shook his head and pushed him away again. “We can finish this after dinner, c´mon”

Jason groaned as he took Timothée´s hand, following him out of the bathroom and to a long and bright hallway. “Can´t we just call him and say we can´t make it?”

Timothée turned around to face him, a goofy smile on his lips as he walked backwards. “We are already here, Jason. Besides, you were the one who said we´ll have all the time we need when we get back to New York”

“I know, I know, but…”

“No buts, I won´t leave Luca alone because you´re horny, but I promise you that…”, Timothée trailed off as he saw Jason´s expression change, a serious tone taking him over. “What´s wrong?”

Timothée turned around, letting out a sigh as he saw Armie and Nick sitting at the table along with Luca and Ferdinando”

“Guess he´s not alone after all”

“I-I didn´t know,” practically whispered Timothée.

“It´s okay, c´mon, let´s go”

Timothée gave him a quick smile before leading him over to Luca´s table. The brunette could feel his palms sweating already. He just wanted a peaceful dinner with Luca, but it seemed life had different plans.

 

****

 

The hotel´s restaurant was practically empty, only a few tables were being used and Luca´s was definitely the loudest and most crowded one. They had finished their meals already, but they all remained on their seats, enjoying some of the most delicious Italian wines, carefully selected by Luca and Ferdinando.

Jason was carefully listening to everything that left Luca´s lips; the man was extremely intelligent and knew a lot about cinema and art in general. While he kept his eyes on the older man, Jason had his hand resting on Timothée´s thigh, rubbing it slowly as the brunette leaned against his body.

They would whisper at one another from time to time, laugh at each other and intertwine their fingers under the table. It would have been a great night to him if it wasn´t for the constant staring coming from the man sat right across from him.

Armie had been doing this from the moment they sat down; his blue eyes barely ever let him and even when their gaze would meet, the older man did nothing to hide his actions. It was clear to him Armie was studying him, trying to understand who he really was; after all at this point, Jason had the upper hand. He knew basically everything about Armie and his relationship with Timothée, while Armie was left in the dark for anything related to him.

As he felt Timothée squeeze his hand, Jason turned to him, a little smile on his lips. “You good or you wanna go,” asked Timothée as Jason shook his head.

“I´m good. I´m enjoying all this conversation about Luca´s new film”

Timothée chuckled. “Okay, I´ll go to the bathroom. I´ll be right back”

Jason nodded, placing a soft kiss on Timothée´s cheek before he turned his attention back to Luca. Not even a minute later though, something else caught his attention. From the corner of his eyes, he could see Armie getting up; he took the same path as Timothée had done just a minute before.

 

****

 

Timothée´s eye wandered to him the moment he left the stall. He was leaning against the wall, arms crossed and a smug look on his face, which left no doubt he was there because of him. Timothée remained silent and made his way to the sink, washing his hands as Armie's eyes followed his every move. He could feel goosebumps all over his skin.

Their eyes met just as Timothée walked past Armie and for a couple of seconds they remained there, eyes locked and bodies just inches away from one another. As Timothée made it to the door, Armie let his arm wrap around the brunette´s waist, pulling him back and against the wall.

Armie's right leg rested in between Timothée´s legs, his thigh softly pressing against the brunette´s crotch as he let his hands rest on the wall on each side of his head. Timothée was suddenly trapped.

“What are you doing,” asked Timothée in a whisper.

“Finishing what we started this morning”

As Armie leaned closer, Timothée could feel his heart beat faster and his body start to tremble. The older man´s hot breath against his face was sending little shivers down his spine and he had to do everything he could to maintain the little bit of sanity that was left in him.

There was barely any space left between them as Armie's legs started to apply a bit more of pressure into Timothée´s groin; when Timothée´s breathing quickened and his body leaned in to his touch, Armie couldn´t help but smile.

Armie closed the gap between them by trapping Timothée´s upper lip in between his, pulling gently. The tamed gasp that left the brunette was enough encouragement for Armie, who cradled his face and let their lips touch in a soft, sweet but short kiss.

As if gaining back his consciousness, Timothée pulled away from Armie, shaking his head as he bit his lip. “Please stop, we can´t do this”

“We´ve done this many times”

“And maybe you are okay doing this to your wife and to me, but I won´t do this to Jason”

“Timmy…”

“Please, Armie.”

It took him all the strength he had to push Armie away from him; a task that wasn´t easy while he was in total control of his emotions and became even harder as he shook from head to toe. Timothée took a few deep breaths, his head hanging low and sweat drenching his body; he needed to calm himself down, but the longer he remained on that bathroom, the worst things would get.

He didn´t look back as he reached for the door, he knew looking at Armie now was the worst thing he could possibly do and so he left. Timothée walked back to the table and practically threw himself on the chair, his hand gripping at Jason´s arm.

“Can we go now,” he whispered as Jason looked at him confused.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes, I just wanna go back to the hotel. We have an early flight tomorrow and I really need to get some sleep”

Jason nodded, a confused and worried look on his face. Timothée seemed nervous. “Okay, we can go”

“Thank you”

As Timothée made his way to Luca, saying his goodbyes, Jason got up and took a quick look around. It didn´t take long for his eyes to land on Armie, who just now made his way back from the bathroom. He was calm and somewhat serious, but in his eyes Jason could see enough to understand everything.

 


	8. My Dear Melancholy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timothée goes back to New York and has to face the consequences of the kiss he and Armie shared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are not very good for Timothée right now, but things are gonna start changing around on the next few chapters.

To say the last fifteen hours had been interesting would be a huge understatement. After what Armie…after what they had done, after the brief kiss they shared, Timothée was left agitated and his feelings were even more messed up than they already were.

It killed him to realize that to this day all it took was a soft touch from Armie and he would break down all his walls, go weak on the knees and feel his heart accelerate. Timothée felt like the man was a drug, overwhelming, exciting and highly addicted. The worst part of it all was that Timothée knew Armie was a drug he would never get over.

Jason had also been affected by the events of the last two days, it was easy to see. The young man was normally very expressive and talkative, he was always smiling and laughing, but since they left Luca´s dinner things had quickly changed. His beaming blue eyes were suddenly serious, sad, preoccupied and he had barely spoken. Timothée knew he had to face the truth, talk to Jason and fix the mess Armie…the mess he and Armie had created.

“Jason, are you okay?”

The questions came right after Timothée had closed the door to the apartment. Jason, with his back turned to him remained silent, but Timothée could tell he was trying to figure out what to say, what to do. He was tense, probably deeply hurt and Timothée couldn´t really blame him.

“Please, talk to me”

“Of course I´m not okay, Timothée”, said Jason, finally turning around. He had tears forming on his eyes, his hands were shaking slightly; he wanted to keep himself cool, but he couldn´t.

“Jason…”

“For starters, I´m feeling stupid for even encouraging you to go to Los Angeles. I should´ve know having you and Armie close wasn´t a good idea, it only made me feel insecure and…”

As Jason trailed off, Timothée took a few steps closer to him; he took his hands in his, stroking it softly with his thumbs. “Jason, I know it wasn´t easy for you and you know it wasn´t easy for me either, but there´s no reason for you to be insecure”

“There´s no reason for me to be insecure? Are you sure about that? Because the second I opened that door and found you two alone in that hotel room…”, he had to stop, take a few deep breaths. “God, Tim, you have no idea how bad I felt”

“Nothing happened, Jason, we just talked”

Jason pinched the bridge of his nose, his eyes closed as he nodded slowly. “What about yesterday? Nothing happened yesterday either?”

Timothée´s body suddenly stiffened and his eyes widened as he stared at Jason. He knew he only had two options at that point: tell the truth or keep himself quiet and probably drive himself crazy with shame and guilt.

“Well, your silence is quite revealing”

Timothée sighed. “Yes he kissed me, but it doesn´t mean anything”

“It means when you love him, Timothée. And I know that because every time you kiss me, I feel like the luckiest man in the world”

Timothée wanted to punch himself. For the last three months the man in front of him had been nothing but loving to him and now here he was, breaking his heart because of Armie.

“Jason, it doesn´t mean anything because I am with you and I want to be with you. Armie is married and he will always be married; he can´t accept who he really is and he will never have the courage to live his life the way he truly wants. He will always chose her because it´s the easiest way. What he and I had is over, I don´t want to feel that kind of pain ever again”

Jason nodded. “If you really mean that, look me in the eyes right now, be honest with me the way you´ve been since the beginning and answer me one simple question. If Armie called you right now saying he´s getting a divorce, you wouldn´t run to his arms immediately?”

The question hit Timothée like a ton of bricks. He felt a lump on his throat, his hands turned into fists and the sweat was suddenly dripping from his forehead. Armie still had him on the palm of his hand and even Jason knew that.

The silence Timothée gave him was more than he could bear. Jason was madly in love with Timothée, but the realization that maybe he would never be loved by the brunette the way he loved Armie hurt more than he could have predicted.

He turned around, picking up his bags from the floor. As much as it hurt, at that moment he had to be alone, he had to think and try to make up his mind on how and where to go from that moment on.

“What are you doing?”

“I´m going back to my place”

“Jason, you don´t have to do this”

“Yes, I do” he said as he turned to look at Timothée.

“A-are you breaking up with me?”

Jason sighed. He knew that´s exactly what he should do; break up with Timothée, get away from the whole mess that was Timothée and Armie's relationship and protect his own heart. But just like Timothée seemed to do with Armie, Jason knew he couldn´t simply walk away.

“No, I´m not. But I do need a few days to myself”

“Jason…”

“Please”, he said in a whisper as Timothée nodded. He let his hand rest on Timothée´s cheek, a soft smile as the brunette leaned into his touch, and kissed his lips softly. Jason rubbed Timothée´s lips for a few seconds, fighting back all the tears that threatened to fall and walked away, closing the door behind him.

 

****

 

Armie woke up on Monday with loud and overly excited screams. Before he could even open his eyes properly Harper was already jumping on the bed, her little arms wrapping around his neck as he chuckled.

“I missed you, daddy”

“I missed you too, Hops”. Armie wrapped his arms around the little girl, his nose nestled on her blonde hair as he smiled. The love and safety he felt at that moment was something he wished he could feel constantly. “Did you have fun with grandma”, he asked.

The little girl nodded her head, but before she could properly answer him, Armie saw Elizabeth make her way inside the bedroom. He looked over at her, smiling slightly as she did the same. He sat Harper down on the bed and got up, walking over to his wife; he placed a soft and quick kiss on her cheek as he picked up Ford, a huge grin on his face as the little boy giggled at him.

“You look happy. Had a nice weekend?”

Armie nodded. “I did actually. Luca and Ferdinando invited me for dinner. It was quite an interesting evening”

“Just the three of you”, Elizabeth asked as she placed her bag on the bed, her eyes on Armie, who sat down on the floor playing with their kids.

“I took Nick with me”, he said, looking up at her quickly. “Timothée and Jason were there too”

“Jason”, she asked confused. “Who´s Jason?”

Armie sighed. He leaned against the wall, Harper and Ford practically crawling all over him as he turned his attention back to Elizabeth. “Jason is Timothée´s boyfriend”

“How long does he have boyfriend?”

“I don´t know, Elizabeth. I met the guy on Friday at the fundraiser. Timothée and I have not really been on speaking terms, remember?”

She barely listened to Armie. “I can´t believe he didn´t tell me he had a boyfriend and that the guy was there”

Armie arched an eyebrow. “You talked to him?”

Elizabeth could tell there was a shift on Armie's tone, suddenly he seemed weird, perhaps even a bit scared. “At the fundraiser, while you drank your weight in champagne”

Armie shot her a look. He knew she hated his drinking –as well as a whole lot of other things he did- but that was a completely unnecessary remark, especially in front of the kids. “Elizabeth…”

“Or because you´re not talking to him you expect me to do the same?”

“That´s not what I meant”, he said although if he was to be honest, at the current situation it was better to keep her and Timothée as far away as possible. “You know what, you look like you need to relax a little bit. Why don´t you have a nice warm bath and then take a nap? I´ll be with the kids”

Armie didn´t even gave her time to respond; he got up, picked up the kids and left the bedroom. He had woken up on such a good mood, the last thing he needed now was to discuss Jason and Timothée´s relationship with Elizabeth.

 

****

 

Timothée was leaned against the wall, sitting at the fire escape as his eyes wandered around the city. It was dark and a storm was coming, but he had no intentions on leaving that spot any time soon. He had spent the last few days trying to focus on his job, read the scripts Brian had sent him, engage with his fans on social media, but his life was such a mess, he simply couldn´t do it.

Jason had been silent for nearly four days. Ever since he left the apartment, Jason didn´t reply to any of his calls or texts. Timothée didn´t really blame him, he was doing what any other person would do in his position. Timothée had been a jerk to him and now he had to face the consequences.

But while Jason was silent, Armie was reaching out. The blond had called, texted and left many voicemails, but Timothée did his best to ignore all of them. He knew himself way too well and he was certain that if he let Armie in he would break down.

He knew the weekend had been chaotic, he had probably sent mixed signals to Armie, but it was only because he couldn´t get a grip of himself. He didn´t want to be unfaithful to Jason, but he also couldn´t deny the attraction he felt for Armie.

On the last couple of days there were moments Timothée thought he should simply give up and ran back to Armie, be with him even if it was on the sidelines. There was a part of Timothée that was filled with love, lust and desire and that part of him craved for Armie. But there was also a part of him that just wanted to be protected and safe.

It´s not like his feelings were confusing to him; no Timothée knew exactly who he was in love with. That was Armie, it had always been Armie, but Armie couldn´t give him that protection and safety, Armie couldn´t give him love.

Especially because Armie couldn´t even love himself.

Timothée closed his eyes, took a few deep breaths and took a sip of his coffee just as his phone started vibrating. He looked down at it, seeing Armie's name light up the screen yet once again, and bit his lip.

He wished his life was simpler, he wished he didn´t have to feel all those things. Sometimes he wished he had never met Armie, because that would make loving Jason easier. But at the same time all he wished was that Armie wasn´t married.

“Fuck”, he mumbled to himself, sinking into a metaphorical hole of desperation that sometimes felt way too real. He shook his head, picked up his phone and searched for the contact list, calling the only person that could possibly make him feel better at that point.

“Bonjour, mon précieux”, said Pauline excitedly.

“Bonjour”

“Well, you sound like crap, what´s going on?”

“My life is a total mess”

 


	9. Break Free

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Timothée seeks Jason, trying to fix things, Armie finally opens up to Nick and decided to take one important step that will change his life forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know, it seems like they are going at complete different directions, but you´d be surprise to see that what you (and I) want is closer than it looks.

“Thank you”, said Armie with a smile on his lips as he reached for the cold beverages. He handed one to Nick as they made their way outside the little bakery and sat down on one of the tables by the sidewalk.

Armie took his phone out, his big blue eyes glued to the screen as his fingers scrolled through it; as he let out a heavy sigh, placing the phone on the table, Nick shot him a look.  “No word from Timothée, huh?”

“What are you talking about?”

“You´ve been obsessed with your phone lately. The past week you´re always checking on it, keeping it close to you as if you don´t want to miss anything. You´re waiting for a call, text or whatever”

“And what does Timothée have to with this, Doctor Delli Santi”, mocked Armie, although he was a little worried about where this conversation was going.

“Is his text you´re waiting for. Am I wrong?”

Armie took a long sip of his ice tea, his eyes still focused on Nick. “Where are you going with this, Nick?”

“Am I wrong,” he insisted.

Armie sighed, leaning back on the chair. “No, you are not wrong. I have been trying to talk to him for a week now. I´ve called, I´ve texted, I´ve left countless voicemails, but he just keeps on ignoring me”

“Until last Friday you spent three months without talking to him. I don’t know why you´re so bothered now”

“It´s frustrating because after Luca´s dinner, I actually thought we were about to go somewhere, but…”, he stopped for a second, shaking his head. “What I mean is that I thought we´d be able to fix our friendship, but I was clearly wrong”

Nick shook his head, an amusing look upon his face as he took a few sips of his tea. Armie kept his eyes on him, arching an eyebrow at his friend´s expression.

“What? Why are you looking at me like this?”

“Honestly? Because I can´t believe it took me so long to connect the dots and figure out what happened between you two”

“And what do you _think_ it happened between Timothée and me, Nick?”

“I think your relationship with Timothée wasn´t restricted to a friendship”

Armie stared at Nick with wide eyes. His mouth had gone dry and his hands were slightly shaking. He inhaled deeply before taking a long sip of his tea. “Nick, you´re going crazy”

Nick chuckled. “Over three months ago you and Timothée had a fight and after that day you started behaving oddly. You were quiet, moody and whenever we mentioned his name you got nervous and started fidgeting with your fingers; that’s something you usually do when you´re scared or worried. Then last Saturday you seemed really excited about a conversation you two had and then at Luca´s dinner you simply couldn´t take your eyes away from him and Jason. God, the way you glared at the man, I was feeling bad for the guy, you were acting like a jealous ex-boyfriend”

Armie rubbed his face as he took quick short breaths. He could barely believe what he was hearing. “Nick, I…”

“Armie, please just stop. Just a few days ago you told me there were things about you that you did not share because you were scared of people turning their back on you. Well, I am not turning my back on you, on the contrary, I´m trying to get you to talk, to open up”

Armie shook his head. He was trying to keep himself together, but he was clearly failing. “You have no idea of the things I have kept to myself all these years”

“You mean the fact that you are also attracted to men?” As Armie buried his face in his hands, Nick sighed. “Armie, I am not like your mother, I don´t know why you felt like you had to keep that from me”

“When did you find out?”

“Does it matter?”

Armie sighed, shaking his head. He took a look around him, suddenly aware they were in the middle of the street. He drank down the remaining of his tea and looked over at Nick. The floodgate had been open, so he might as well just spill everything.

“Can we have this conversation somewhere else?”

 

****

 

Timothée had always loved Brooklyn, but he felt like he only truly started to appreciate it after he met Jason. It was a grey and cold September afternoon, Timothée had just left a long and boring meeting –which didn´t result in anything- and decided to have some nice hot coffee before he could go back home.

Not even two minutes after he sat down, Timothée saw the tall blue eyed brunette make his way over to him and ask if they could share the table. The coffee shop was crowded and the brunette needed to finish his essay on Ancient History. Timothée, of course, agreed to share the table with the young man, which led to them spending at least three long hours in conversation.

They ran into one another two weeks later in a small bookstore in Manhattan and once again indulged in hours of conversation and hot coffee. They had random meetings for a month and a half until one day Jason asked him out. Timothée of course said _no;_ despite the fact Jason was an extremely attractive, intelligent and fun man to be around, Timothée was too caught up on Armie to actually go out with anyone.

Jason took the decline quite well. They shared phone numbers, started texting and soon had developed a nice little friendship. When his thing with Armie blew up, it was to Jason he ran to; the guy understood him, didn´t judge him for going out with a married man and from that moment on, they were practically inseparable.

During the week of silence, Timothée thought a lot about what to do with his life. Did he think he would ever be able to love Jason the way he loved Armie? Probably not, but Jason was available and ready to give him love, while Armie might never find the strength to do so.

By then Timothée knew the Brooklyn Museum like the palm of his hand and it did not take long for him to find the right flight of stairs and go down the Museum´s underground. He followed down a long and bright hallway until he reached the well-known door; he knocked slowly and quickly was greeted by a red haired young woman, who smiled as she saw him.

“Timothée, it´s been a while”, she said as he gave her a quick hug. “He´s on the file room”

“Thank you.” He made his way inside the office and headed over to the closed door on his left; Timothée didn´t knock, he simply walked in. “Hey stranger”

Jason turned around, eyebrows furrowed as he saw Timothée standing there. “Tim, what are you doing here?”

“I want to talk to you, Jason. Try to solve everything between us.” As Jason sighed, Timothée took a step closer to him. “Please, let´s just talk”

Jason nodded. “Okay, let´s talk”

 

****

 

Armie was sitting quietly on the floor of Nick´s apartment. He had his back leaned against the couch and his head down as he played with his fingers. He heard Nick call out his name and looked up, taking in his hand the beer his friend offered. He gave him a small smile, before locking his eyes on the bottle, toying with it as Nick sat down next to him.

“I don´t really know where to start,” Armie practically whispered.

“If you don´t want to talk, you don´t have to”

He shook his head as he took a deep breath. He had to do this now or else he might explode. "I was fifteen when I realized I was different from the other guys around me. I knew I liked girls, I knew they excited me, but all of a sudden I realized some guys had the exact same effect on me. I was so conflicted with myself, because everything I was feeling was exactly what my mom said it was sinful and wrong and…”, Armie shook his head, the pain in his eyes visible. “I felt like I was an abomination, Nick and I was scared of what they would do if they found out, if she found out”

Armie let out a sigh, suddenly feeling a heavy weight be lifted off his shoulders as he finally allowed himself to talk to Nick. “I was seventeen when I first kissed a guy. I met him at that club our families used to go to, we spent about a month stealing glances from one another, until one day he cornered me on the tennis court. I was scared as hell, but at the same time I was thinking I should do that. We would kiss, I would get it out of my system and everything would go back to normal. But then he kissed me and I felt a thrill I had never felt before; when I felt his hands on my body, I knew I would need that for the rest of my life. And I did, you know. I had my fair share of girlfriends and I cared about all of them, even loved some but no matter how happy I was with them, I always needed the touch of a man to feel complete”

“Was it the same with Elizabeth?”

“You´re asking if I cheated on her”, he asked as Nick nodded. “Many times. I was faithful to her on the first three months or something, but then I was back to my old routine. Affair after affair, lover after lover, never the same guy twice”

“Not until Timothée”

Armie nodded, a small smile on his lips. “Everything changed after I met Timothée”

“And how did you two get together?”

“It was my third week in Crema and we were on the second day of filming. We did the usual, went to dinner at Luca´s place and then headed back to my place. I don´t even remember how, but we ended up talking about our sexual preferences, sharing things we had never shared with anyone else. We realized that not only we liked some of the same stuff, but also that Timothée was curious about a lot of the things I enjoyed.”

“We had sex for the first time that night and it was something like I had never felt before, an intimacy, a surrender that…” Armie let out a breath as he rubbed his face. “After that night we decided we would remain as friends with benefits, for the lack of a better term; no romance, no attachments, just two guys who craved a kind of…a kind of thrill only the other could provide”

Nick nodded. “And how did it all go wrong?”

“A little over three months ago I flew to New York because we were supposed to spend the weekend together. The minute I stepped into his apartment though, I knew something was different. He told me he was in love with me and that he couldn´t hide it anymore; when I tried to change the subject he snapped at me. He called me a coward, threw in my face that I´d never leave Liz because I´m scared of what people would think. At that moment I was confused and mad, so I didn´t even say anything, I just walked out. We didn´t speak until the fundraiser”

“Armie, what exactly do feel for Timothée?”

“I love him”, he said with a smile, but his eyes were teary. “It took me losing him to realize, but I love him”

“Does he know?”

“He didn´t really give me much of a chance to explain anything.” Armie let out a breath, taking a sip of his beer. “We kissed on Saturday night and I was thrilled about it, but then he started to ignore me. He hasn´t talked to me ever since and I don´t even know if I should keep on trying”

“I think you should fight for what you want, Armie and if it´s Timothée that you want, then fight for him. Although there´s one things you should take care of first.”

“My marriage”, he said as Nick nodded. “I´ve been thinking about this a lot lately. After my fight with Timothée I started seeing things from a different perspective. I don´t love Liz anymore and haven´t loved her for a while, so really, there´s only one thing I can do right now”

“Which is” Nick asked. He was pretty sure of what Armie meant, but still, he wanted to hear it from him.

“I´m gonna talk to Elizabeth and ask for the divorce”

 

****

 

They were sitting at a secluded corner of the coffee shop; the place was silent and not very crowded, which helped the couple feel more at ease. It wasn´t an easy conversation, the last thing they wanted was people staring at them.

“Look, I know you hate me, but…”

“I could never hate you, Tim”

“But you should hate me, you should be mad at me. All you have done since we met is love and support me and yet I let myself fall for Armie's games. That´s exactly why I didn´t want to go to Los Angeles, I was scared of how I´d react being so close to him. I know this is not an excuse for what I did, but when I tell you I never meant to hurt you, I really mean it. And I know I probably don´t deserve it, but I need your forgiveness, I need you to give me a second chance”

“There´s nothing in the world I want more than to be with you, Tim, but at the same time I keep asking myself if it´s worth it”

Timothée looked down. “I understand it”

“Hey, look at me”, he said leaning forward, his hand resting on top of Timothée´s. As the brunette looked back at him, Jason gave him a small smile and squeezed his hand. “I know I´m either stupid or a masochist, I know there´s a huge chance of me getting out of this hurt, but I can´t simply walk away from you”

Timothée arched an eyebrow as he bit his lip. “Are you saying you´re gonna give me another chance?”

Jason nodded. “Yes, I will give you another chance. Again, I know I´m putting myself and my heart at risk here; I know it might take you a long time to actually forget Armie, but if you really are willing to try and make this work, then I will give you another chance”

“I want to make this work, Jason. I like you so much and I know we can be happy together. I know we can have a long and loving relationship”

Jason nodded as he pulled Timothée closer to him, placing a soft kiss on his lips. Timothée cradled Jason´s face, a soft smile on his lips as he leaned their foreheads together. He would do everything he could to forget Armie, to push back everything that happened between them and move on once for all. He deserved that.

 


	10. Isn't It Ironic?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Timothée tries to make it work with Jason, Armie tries to have an important conversation with Elizabeth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a very difficult chapter to write cause I had to use someone else's computer and lord, it takes some time getting used to. Sorry for any mistakes. I will try my best to upload another one on Sunday, because after that I might be away for a while, but enjoy.

  The bedroom was mostly dark, but filled with sounds of low moaning and heavy breathing. Lying on the bed, the two young men had their bodies tangled, their lips reaching any skin they could find. Timothée was on top, his hand tightly wrapped around Jason's cock, pumping it in a slow and steady rhythm.  
  Jason had one leg wrapped around Timothée's hip, keeping his body pressed against his as he thrust his hips forward, fucking himself on Timothée's hand. He threw his head back, biting hard on his lips as Timothée quickened his pace; Jason could feel the precum oozing out of him as well as the little shivers that run down his spine every time Timothée's fingers brushed against his slit.  
  Timothée smirked as he felt Jason's body tremble underneath him. He moved his lips from Jason's neck up to his jaw and finally to his lips, kissing him roughly. He gave Jason's cock one last tug before sliding his hand further down, his finger slowly teasing Jason's hole.  
  Jason let his fingers knot on Timothée's curls as he moved his lips in synchrony with his; the heat emanating from their bodies, the low muffed moans and the friction of Timothée's cock rubbing softly against his own was driving him crazy and he couldn't suppress a loud moan from escaping him as he felt Timothée's finger enter him.  
  "Fuck Timothée, I have class in less than an hour", said Jason in between moans as Timothée smirked. "Can't you get this over with?"  
  "Or maybe I should just stop", he teased as he removed his finger from Jason, who groaned. "You left me hanging for a week, I'm sure you can handle a couple of hours"  
  "Oh hell no". Jason rolled them over on the bed and straddled Timothée's thighs. He let his hand wrap around his boyfriend's shaft, rubbing it fast as Timothée closed his eyes and threw his head back. "Still want to leave this for later?"  
  Timothée hissed through clenched teeth and quickly reached out for the nightstand, grabbing a condom. He chuckled as Jason took it from him, ripped off the package and rolled onto his cock with an eagerness Timothée had only seen with... no, he would not go down that road.  
  He bit his lip, holding tightly onto Jason's hips as the brunette lowered himself on his dick. "Fuck" he muttered as Jason finally began to move his hips, riding him with patience.  
Jason had his hands sprawled on Timothée's chest, his back arched and his head thrown back as he increased his speed, feeling Timothée's cock throb inside of him. He moaned loud, the sweat running down his body as his breathing got hasty and the muscles on his thighs started to twitch.  
  "Timmy..."  
  Timothée had his eyes closed and the sound of Jason calling him Timmy was too much. He couldn't help himself anymore and all of a sudden flashes of him and Armie in bed together flooded his head. He pulled Jason down, kissed him deeply and rolled them over; he gave it a couple more powerful thrusts, their loud moans filling the entire apartment as they shuddered, coming in union.  
  "Fuck", mumbled a breathless Jason.  
  Timothée smiled -filled with shame for what he had just done- and rolled off of Jason, lying beside Jason on the bed. He took a few deep breaths, his arm wrapping around Jason's waist, his head resting on his chest.  
  Jason snuggled closer to Timothée, breathing him in as he let his hand slowly rub down the brunette's arm. "I have to go get ready", he whispered as Timothée hummed. Jason smiled, placing a soft kiss on his forehead and got up.  
  "Do we meet here or at my place?"  
  "I'll be in Manhattan later today, so your place it is", said Jason with a smile as he saw Timothée nod, his eyes closing as he snuggled into the pillows.

 

                                 *****

  The sun had barely risen when Armie woke up. With sleepy eyes, he moved around the bed, a sigh leaving him as he saw Elizabeth sleeping peacefully on his side. He stared at her for a couple of seconds; it was weird to think that a couple of years back the sight of her like this would make him smile from ear to ear and now it did absolutely nothing. She had become more of a mother figure -especially with all the personality traits she shared with his mother-  than a wife.  It was sad, but it was the truth.  
  He moved slowly, not in the mood to wake her up, and sat down on the bed, reaching for his phone as he did so. He checked his voicemails, his missed calls, his texts and bit his lip. He had been trying to reach out to Timothée for over a week now and yet the brunette remained silent.  
  Armie knew he had dubious actions on the past, he knew he deserved all the silence and hate Timothée could aim towards him. But all he wanted now was the chance to be face to face with him, to discuss their current situation and maybe, just maybe make things better.  
  He was aware that a real and healthy relationship with Timothée could only happen if he could show the brunette he could actually change, that he could fight all his demons and find a way to live with himself, without masks and without lies. Armie knew he could do this, but he also knew it would be a hell of a bumpy ride.

  _Please, answer me._  
 _I just wanna talk._

  Armie stared at the messages for a couple of seconds before hitting send. He knew it was stupid to do so, he knew Timothée probably didn't want anything to do with him anymore. But Armie wouldn't give up until they actually talked.  
  He felt Elizabeth move beside him, but his eyes remained focused on the phone, as if staring at it would change anything. He suddenly felt his body stiffen as Elizabeth's warm hand rested on his thigh. He closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths as her lips found his neck, kissing softly just as her hand made its way inside his shirt.  
  She rubbed his stomach before moving to his hairy chest and that's when he took hold of her wrist, stopping her movements as he opened his eyes. Now focusing his attention on her, he shook his head as she arched an eyebrow and moved back so she could look better at him.  
  "Stop, please"  
  "Stop", she asked incredulous.  
  "I'm not in the mood"  
  "You are not in the mood", she said almost in a whisper as Armie sighed. God, he hated this situation. "Since when you are not in the mood for sex, Armie?"  
  Armie could only stare at her. If he was to be honest he would have to say the problem wasn't that he was not in the mood for sex, but that he wasn't in the mood for _sex with her_. "You talk like I'm some kind of sex addict. I am just like you, Elizabeth, sometimes I'm just not in the mood"  
  She nodded. "That's your answer for everything lately, isn't it? What is going on with you, Armie? For months you've been acting like a total different person and all you tell me is that you are not in the mood? What you're in the mood for lately?"  
  "I'm sorry, but...", before Armie could finish though, the cry of Ford caught their attention. Elizabeth looked at him for a few seconds before she got up from the bed and made her way out of the room. Armie could only stare as she marched out, anger and confusion consuming her. This was it, he had to talk to her as soon as possible.

 

*****

  "So by the look on your face I guess you talked to Elizabeth", asked Nick as he slid a beer bottle over to Armie, who was sitting across from him.  
  Armie had his elbows resting on the marble counter, his face buried on his hands as he shook his head. He let out a sigh and looked over at his friend, a look of despair on his eyes.  
  "No, I didnt"  
  Nick arched an eyebrow. "Why not? Last time we talked you told me you'd try to talk to Timothée about your situation and that you'd get a divorce. What changed now?"  
  "Nothing changed, Nick. I've been trying to talk to Timothée for days now, but he won't reply to me. I won't give up though, I will keep trying until he gives me a chance to talk about us"  
  "What about Elizabeth?"  
  "That's a little bit more complicated"  
  "C'mon Armie"  
  "Nick, I know you're trying to help, but when it comes to Elizabeth you gotta see things from my perspective, okay? Elizabeth and I have been together for nearly ten years, we have two kids and a business together, I need to be careful, I need to think about everything or all I'm gonna do is keep on hurting the peoole I care about and I can't do that anymore."  
  Nick sighed, nodding his head. "I understand what you are trying to say, but I need you to keep in mind that by not having this conversation you might be making things worse. Is it gonna hurt? Of course it will, but life is full of pain, we have to learn how to live with it"  
  "Don't worry, Doctor Delli Santi, I will talk to her"  
  "I'm considering the idea of charging you for my advices, I'm getting too caught up on your shit"  
  Armie chuckled. "But that's what friends are for"

 

                                 *****

  Jason sat by the fire escape, a light blanket wrapped around his shoulder as he stared down the city. He took a few sips of his coffee, the warmth embracing him just as the front door opened. He looked over his shoulder, a smile on his lips as he saw Timothée walk in.  
  Their eyes locked and Timothée smiled as he made his way over. He sat down beside Jason, who wrapped his arm around him, and leaned his head against his shoulder. "I thought you'd still be at the museum"  
  "Didn't have much to do, so I was able to leave earlier. I got here and you were not home, so I made some coffee and sat here to watch the sun set"  
  "God, you're such a softie", tease Timothée as Jason laughed, tightening his grip around him. "I saw your text, what is it that you want to talk to me about?"  
  "My mom has been bugging me for weeks now, she wants me to visit and since I got Friday off, I thought we could go to Portland on Thursday, spend a few days there"  
  Timothée put on a little smile on his lips, but his head was going on overdrive. Going to Portland with Jason meant meeting his parents and that was too much for him right now. "Jason, I'd love to go with you, but I actually have dinner with Brian and Peter on Friday". He wasn't lying about that, he actually did have dinner with Brian and Peter. Of course he could easily cancel, but he wasn't going to do it; meeting Jason's parents now was not an option.  
  "That's okay. I'll probably be back by Saturday night anyway"  
  "You don't have to rush anything, Jason. Spend as much time with your family as you need to. I'm sure they miss you"  
  Jason smiled. "We'll find some other weekend we can go"  
  Timothée nodded. "Yes we will"

 

                                   ****

  "Hey, can we talk", asked Armie as he leaned against the wall on the office. Elizabeth sat down on the small brown couch, her eyes scanning a cook book. At the sound of his voice, she lifted her eyes from the book and nodded her head.  
  "Is everything okay", she asked as she watched Armie make his way over. He sat down on the opposite side of the couch, his head down, his hands shaking slightly. He was clearly nervous.  
  "Nothing is okay Elizabeth and you have probably noticed that by now"  
  "I don't know what you are talking about, Armie"  
  His blue eyes met hers as he let out a sigh. "Elizabeth please, don't do this. You know as much as I do that we have problems, our marriage has problems"  
  Elizabeth's expression hardened as she heard those words; her eyes scanned Armie one more time, trying to read whatever was going through his head. "Armie, we've been together for nearly ten years, of course things are gonna change. It's completely normal that we fall into a routine and sometimes things are gonna get a little rough. That doesn't mean we have problems...at least not more than any other couple"  
  "Elizabeth, this is not us falling into a routine. Our marriage hasn't been the same in over two years, we're getting more and more distant, we barely talk and when we do it usually ends in some sort of argument. This is not normal couple behavior"  
  "And you are blaming me for this?"  
   "What?! No, of course not". Armie buried his face in his hands, taking a few deep breaths before he allowed himself to look at her again. "I'm just as responsible for this situation, Elizabeth, maybe even more. What I'm trying to say is that we can't just sit still, do nothing about it and pretend everything is okay"  
  "Then let's do something about it", she said as Armie arched an eyebrow. "You have a few weeks off before rehearsals for the play start, maybe we could go to the Caymans, Europe, Japan or South America, I really don't care where"  
  "Us going away is not gonna save anything"  
  "You don't know that", she said as Armie sighed. "You said yourself we shouldn't sit around and do nothing, so let's do something. I'll call my mom and see if she can stay with the kids for the weekend, so..."  
  "I'll be on New York all weekend", he said quickly. She stopped talking, her eyes remained on his for a while, studying him, before she nodded her head.  
  "That's fine, we'll go on the weekend after that. We'll make this marriage work, Armie, we love each other and I am not giving up on us"  
  "Elizabeth...." Armie sighed as she got up and walked away from him. He leaned his head back on the couch cushions, his blue eyes glued to the ceiling. He knew this conversation wouldn't be an easy one, but he did not expect things to go this way.


	11. How Soon Is Now?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In New York Timothée says goodbye to Jason as he prepares for a weekend all alone, while in Los Angeles Armie finally takes a stand and set things straight with Elizabeth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I promised another episode and here I am. Some things I'd like to say: I'm really unsure about this chapter, I wrote it a lot of times and it never really seemed to say everything I wanted, but oh well I hope you enjoy, cause it's a important chapter for Armie.  
> Also, I will try to post again as soon as possible, but things are chaotic and without a computer it gets a little harder to do it.

  Timothée sat on the messy bed, his chin leaned against his knees as he watched Jason move around on the tiny apartment, collecting his things. He chuckled, biting his lip as Jason let out a sigh, plunging himself on the bed.  
  "You got everything you need", asked Timothée as Jason nodded slowly, before turning to look at Timothée over his shoulder.  
  "Leah texted me, things are chaotic at the museum after yesterday night, I might not be able to stop by to see you"  
  Timothée smiled. "Jason you don't have to worry about me, okay? Just go and do your thing, we'll see each other on Saturday night, right?"  
  Jason nodded, scooting closer to Timothée on the bed. "I'll be back as soon as possible"  
  "Seriously, don't rush anything because of me. Your mom misses you and she's the one you should be focusing on, I'll be fine"  
  "Are you gonna be here all alone?"  
  "I might go out for drinks with Will tonight. I also have some scripts I'd like to go through before dinner with Brian tomorrow"  
  Jason nodded again and leaned closer, kissing Timothée softly on the lips. "I have to go now, I'll call you as soon as I get to Portland"  
  "I'll be waiting"

   
                                 ******

  The day was hot and dry, the air was getting thinner with each step he took, which made breathing a task harder than it should be. The sweat was drenching his shirt, his face was flushed, his heart pounding on his chest and his thighs were burning. Nick felt like he was about to pass out.  
  He slowed down his pace until he came to a stop and crouched down on the ground. "Fuck", he mumbled to himself, feeling every single muscle on his body burn.  
  "C'mon Nick, we're almost at the top", shouted Armie as he looker back at Nick over his shoulder.  
  "Dude, I know you are trying to release your frustration with all this hiking shit, but I can't do this anymore, okay? I can barely feel my legs and my heart is about to explode"  
  Armie rolled his eyes as he made his way back to his friend. "God, you're weak"  
  Nick shot him a look as he sat down properly on the ground. "What the hell is wrong with you today?"  
  "Nothing"  
  "Seriously, dude, what's wrong?"  
  "Well besides the fact Elizabeth has been planning a romantic weekend for us in South America, I also woke up today with the news of Hollywood Sweetheart Timothée Chalamet joining his boyfriend at a party at the Brooklyn Museum"  
  Nick arched an eyebrow. "That's it? That's why you are mad? You almost killed me going up this hill because you're mad at Timothée for going to a party with his boyfriend?"  
  "Wow, thank you very much for the support"  
  Nick rolled his eyes. "I'm doing everything I can to help you Armie, but right now you're just being stupid. Timothée has absolutely no idea of your feelings for him and all he is trying to do is move on from the pain you caused him"  
   "I know that, Nick, you don't have to remind me. I know he is not doing anything wrong, which makes me even madder at myself for being mad at him"  
  "You have to talk to him, Armie. You're gonna be in New York for three days, you can't let this opportunity slip through your fingers. It's time for you to stop worrying about the consequences and just try to find your happiness"  
  Armie sighed and sat down too, his head down as he played with his fingers. "You should know by now it's not so easy for me to open up"  
  "Timothée already knows everything about you Armie, all you have to do now is let him know you feel for him the exact same thing he feels for you"  
  Armie nodded his head as he let his eyes wander through the landscape. He took a deep breath and tried to put a smile on his lips, looking over at Nick. "Thanks for trying to help me out, for grounding me and saying what I need to hear"  
  Nick shrugged. "That's what I'm here for"  
  Armie chuckled. "Have you ever thought about changing professions? You'd be a great therapist"  
  Nick laughed, shaking his head. "And have to deal with people like you? God no, I'm good. Now can we please get the hell out of here and go eat some big greasy burgers? I really need that"  
  Armie nodded his head, got up and stood his hand out to help Nick get up. "C'mon old man, let's go"

 

                                 *****

   At the beginning of the night, as he walked inside the house, Armie was met with silence and dim lights. He arched an eyebrow, a confused look upon his face as he looked around. It wasn't even eight and normally by this time he would still find the kids playing on the living room before they got ready for bed.  
  Slightly scared, Armie made his way past the living room and over to the dinning room, a sigh escaping him as he saw Elizabeth leaned against the table, a small smile on her red lips. She was wearing a tight black and white dress, her shoulders and toned legs bared, her makeup was -as always- impeccable and her hair was up in a fancy ponytail.  
  Armie bit his lip as he looked past her and at the table; there were candles, wine and some of his favorite dishes. Elizabeth had not been joking, she would do everything she could to save their marriage and this was her way of trying to seduce him. This was her way of gaining back control of the situation.  
  He was speechless, he was scared and worried. He didn't want to hurt Elizabeth even more than he had already, but he needed to do this once for all. He took a few steps closer to her, but made sure to remain at a safe distance, he didn't want to give her any mixed signals.  
  "Elizabeth, what is this? What are you doing?"  
   Elizabeth was the one to close the gap between them, her soft hands resting on his arms, rubbing it tenderly. "The other day you mentioned how we can't sit around and expect things to get better and you were right. Our marriage fell into a routine, we are going through a rough path, but this is me doing everything I can to fix our relationship."  
   "You don't get it, do you?"  
   "What are you talking about?"  
   "I'm talking about us, I'm talking about the fact you either don't seem to understand what I'm trying to say or you're pretending not to"  
   "Why are you talking to me like this, Armie? I'm trying to fix our relationship, to make our marriage work. Isn't that what you want?"  
   Armie shook his head as he took a few steps back, getting away from Elizabeth's touch. He rubbed his face and ran his fingers through his hair, he was doing his best to keep himself together.  
   "Elizabeth you got it all wrong, okay? I was trying to tell you our marriage is failing, we sat around doing nothing for way too long and now it's too late"  
   "It's not too late, Armie. If we work hard and if we're patient we can fix all of this"  
   "There's nothing left to fix, Elizabeth!"  
    Her face suddenly changed. What early was a soft and perhaps even saddened expression, now was replaced by coldness. That was a look Armie knew quite well, whenever Elizabeth felt like she was losing control of things, she turned cold and meticulously thought every move she made and every word she said.  
  "There's nothing left to fix? We've been together for nearly ten years Armie, you're willing to give up on that because we are going through a rough path?"  
   "This is not a rough path, Elizabeth and this is not us falling into a routine, okay? This is our marriage shattered to the ground and there's no amount of romantic dinners or trips to South America that can save us"  
   "It can if you give us a chance"  
   "Elizabeth please, please stop pretending you can't see what's going on, because I know you can"  
   "All I can see is that the man I knew has disappeared. In front of me is a man who clearly doesn't care about me, about our children or everything we've accomplished on the last ten years"  
   "That's not true. I care, I care so much that I decided to be honest with you"  
   Elizabeth let out a laugh, her eyes filled with tears. "Are you actually gonna try to tell me you are doing this for our own good? You actually want me to believe you cared about me and our children when you decided our marriage...", she sighed, trying to keep herself together. "When you decided our marriage wasn't worth saving?"  
   "I did, Elizabeth, I actually did. If we keep this going we're gonna end up hurting ourselves and the kids"  
   "You're already hurting me!"  
   "It could be worse. I've seen my parents go down this road and we don't deserve to go through any of this."  
   She bit hard on her lip, took a couple of deep breaths and walked closer to Armie. Elizabeth cradled his face, standing on her toes so she could reach him; her thumbs brushed against his cheeks as she leaned closer, resting her forehead against his.  
   "I know we can make it work if we just try a little bit."  
   "Elizabeth..."  
   "Let's just sit down, talk about all of this and figure out a way to solve this. I'm sure we can find a middle ground, where things will be good for both of us"  
   "What are you talking about?"  
   "I'm talking about whatever you want, Armie. You want me to stop talking to your mom so much? You want us to stop using condoms all the time? Maybe I could try one of those weird things you like so much. What do you want? I'm sure I can do it"  
   Armie furrowed his eyebrows as he pushed her away from his body. Her voice was soft and calm, but the look in her eyes said everything Armie needed to know. This was her trying to play with him, trying to get her way.  
  "Stop playing games Elizabeth and start seeing things as they really are. If we insist in this marriage, we're just gonna lose ourselves"  
   "You've already lost yourself"  
   Armie let out a breath as he watched Elizabeth wipe out the remains of her tears and look at him with serious eyes. "You might hate me now, but one day you'll realize what I am doing is for the best of both of us"  
   "You've made up your mind, haven't you? You thought about all of this on your own, so of course nothing I say right now will change your mind"  
   "You're right. I've made up my mind and there's no turning back now. I've already talked to my lawyers"  
   She furrowed her eyebrows. "You did what?"  
   "I explained the situation and I'll be meeting with them on Monday"  
   "I can't believe you did all of this behind my back. You had no right to do this Armie,  you had no right to decide things by yourself"  
   Armie has his hands on his pockets and his head down as he tried to steady his breathing and keep himself calm. "I'll be in New York all weekend, I hope you can use this weekend to think about all of this. Maybe some distance will help you realize I am doing this for our own good"  
    Elizabeth rolled her eyes. "You keep telling yourself that"  
    Armie finally allowed himseld to look up, his blue eyes meeting Elizabeth's brown ones as she shot him a glare. He could see pain in her eyes, but he could also see a kind of rage that he had never seen before. He was in pain just as much as her, but he had to remain strong and centred. She had to understand he was 100% serious about this.  
   "I'm going to bed now", he said as he made his way to the stairs. He sighed, shaking his head and looked at her over his shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll sleep on the guest bedroom"  
 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are we ready for New York?!


	12. Holy War and Holy Need

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie and Timothée reunite in New York.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I managed to come back sooner than expected, because well, you guys deserve New York.
> 
> Tittle comes from Duran Duran's song Ordinary World.

   "Jason, you don't have to give me any explanations"  
   "Of course I do, I told you I'd be back by Saturday"  
   Timothée chuckled, the phone pressed to his ear as he sat alone at the table. "And you won't because you want to spend more time with your parents and your bother, I get it"  
   "Is more like they are keeping me hostage", said Jason with a chuckle as Timothée laughed. "I've changed my flight to Monday morning, I'll be in New York around two or three. Are you busy on Monday?"  
   "Not that I remember"  
   "Good, then we can go out at night, do something fun"  
   "I'd like that very much"  
   There was a brief moment of silence, but Timothée could hear someone shouting on the background and children laughing. "Oh God, I've gotta go now before my dad sets the house on fire. I'll see you on Monday. Love you"  
   "See you on Monday", said Timothée before hanging up. He looked around the crowded restaurant once again and then his watch, Brian was almost twenty minutes late and he was starting to feel very uncomfortable as he sat alone on that large table.  
   "May I get you something to drink, Sir?"  
   Timothée looked up at the waiter, a small smile on his lips. "A Gin and Tonic, please"  
   The man nodded and walked away just as Timothée heard his name being called and a hand rest on his shoulder. He looked up, a sigh of relief escaping him as he saw Brian standing there. He got up, hugging the man quickly.  
   "I'm sorry we're late, but we had some problems at home. I hope you're not waiting for too long"  
   Timothée shrugged. "It's okay, don't worry"  
   "Oh and look who we found down the street", said Brian as Timothée turned around. His smile dropped as he saw Peter and Armie walking towards them. Armie had a restrained smile on his face, his hands tucked inside his pockets as he stared back at Timothée.  
   Timothée had received a text from Armie saying he would be in New York, but as he had done with all the other ones, Timothée ignored and deleted. The last thing he expected was to see Armie with Brian and Peter.  
   "Hey", said Timothée, his voice barely a whisper.  
   "Hey"  
   Timothée could feel Brian and Peter staring at them. Normally at this point they would already be on each other's arms, hugging and laughing. But that dynamic didn't exist anymore.  
   "I'm gonna go see if I can get myself a table", said Armie as Brian shook his head.  
   "What? Of course not, you're having dinner with us"  
   "I don't want to interrupt anything, Brian"  
   Peter shook his head and pulled a chair for Armie. "You never interrupt, Armie, we love your company. Right Timothée?"  
   Armie's eyes wandered to the brunette. He wanted him to smile and say _yes, I want your company_ , but he knew right now this was just wishful thinking.  
   "Sir, your Gin and Tonic"  
   Timothée looked up, relief washing over his face as he took the drink in his hands. He took one long sip of it, feeling the cold liquid run down his throat and sighed. If he was going to get through this dinner, he would probably need more than one drink.

 

                          *****

   It had been an interesting night to say the least. Armie and Timothée had not shared one single word after their shy hey at the beginning of dinner. Sitting across from each other, they stole quick glances at one another, but avoided eye contact whenever the other one would turn around. It was easy for anyone to realize that there was some tension between the two of them, although no one could really tell the nature of it.  
   By the end of the night, when Brian suggested going back to his apartment for a couple more drinks, Timothée was quick to decline the invitation. He made up an excuse, said he had to call Jason, but the truth was Timothée wasn't sure he could handle any more of this. He had to go home, have a cold shower and wash away his feelings for Armie. Just being this close to the older man made him feel weak and drawn to him in a way he wished he had already suppressed.  
   Armie remained sitted as he watched Timothée got up from his seat, say his goodbyes to Brian and Peter and address him a small and tamed smile. As the brunette made his way out of the restaurant, Armie's eyes remained on him and for a split second he thought it would be better to forget about all of this. Timothée was clearly doing this because he wanted to move on, he wanted to find happiness with Jason and if he really loved him, maybe Armie should allow him to do just that.  
   But at the same time, Armie couldn't help but hear Nick's voice inside his head, telling him he had to talk to Timothée, to let him know the truth about his feelings towards him. If after everything was said and done, Timothée still chose to ignore him, then Armie would try and move on too.  
   "Gentlemen, I better go too. Jet-lag is killing me, I guess I'm getting too old for this shit", he said with one of his dashing smiles. He gave both men a hug and thanked them for the evening; even without knowing, they were the reason he actually had a chance to at least see Timothée.  
   Once outside the restaurant, Armie took one deep breath, allowing the cold breeze to embrace him as his eyes wandered around the streets. Timothée couldn't be that far away, he left just seconds before Armie and the blond needed to find him before he disappeared in the sea of people in the streets of New York.  
   A sense of relief washed over Armie as he spotted Timothée across the street. He smiled a little as he watched Timothée walking lazily, head down and hands stuck in his pockets.  
   Taking advantage of his long legs, Armie quickly crossed to the other side and ran down the street, catching up with Timothée in no time. "Timothée", he called out, only to see the brunette quicken his pace.  
Armie rolled his eyes and walked a bit faster, closing the gap between them and taking a firm grip on Timothée's arm. He pulled him down a dark alley, feeling Timothée stir, but didn't let go of him until they were far enough from the curious eyes.  
   "Let me go, Armie"  
   "I will, but you'll have to listen to me, Timothée"  
   Timothée bit his lip as Armie released him. He looked down at his arm and rubbed it softly, before allowing his eyes to finally meet Armie's.  
   "We have nothing left to discuss, Armie. When will you understand that?"  
   "Have you considered that maybe you've said everything you wanted, but I never really got the chance to speak?"  
   "Maybe because you walked away from me the moment I told you I loved you"  
   "That's not true, Timothée. I was there, I heard you call me a coward, I let you rant about everything you had buried deep inside of you and when I tried to talk, you simply told me to leave. You didn't care about what I had to say back then and you keep doing this now"  
   "Because no matter what you say, I am the one who ends up hurt, Armie. I'm always the one getting hurt"  
   "I was hurt too, okay?"  
   Timothée chuckled as he rolled his eyes. "Yeah right"  
   Armie shook his head, taking a step closer to Timothée, who backed up against the wall. "Just because you can't see other people's pain, doesn't mean they are not suffering, Timothée."  
  The brunette bit his lip and kept his eyes focused on Armie, who took this as an opportunity to finally say everything he had boiling up inside of him.  
   "You were not alone in that relationship, Timothée and when it ended it affected both of us. I get it, you were the one feeling alone and betrayed, but you have no right to assume I wasn't in pain either. I have been through hell for the past four months, my mind and my home have been a mess, but you don't know that, because you keep ignoring me."  
   "And I will keep on doing it for as long as it takes me to forget you, Armie"  
   "But you don't want to forget me"  
   "You don't know what I want"  
   "Yes, I do. And I do because I know everything about you, Timothée. I know all your dreams, I know all yours fears, I know what makes you weak on the knees and I know you love me"  
   Timothée swallowed hard as he watched Armie close the gap between them. One more step and their bodies would be pressed together. "I do love you, Armie, more than I should, but the pain that comes along with loving you is too much to bear"  
   "There's no need for pain anymore, Timmy.  I want the same as you, I want us to work this out and be happy"  
   Timothée shrugged. "There's no happy ending for us"  
  "If we never try, then yes, there will never be a happy ending"  
  Timothée could barely hold himself together. His body and heart wanted different things than his brain and he felt like a total mess. He had tears in his eyes, but at the same time he could feel every single part of his body catch on fire because of the proximity of Armie. Why everything had to be so confusing?  
   "I need to go", he whispered.  
   "Don't run away from me again, Timothée"  
   "Please, Armie, just let me go"  
  Armie sighed but gave him a quick nod as he stepped back.  Their eyes remained locked for a few seconds before Timothée turned to leave.  
   "Wait!"  
   Timothée sighed as he felt Armie's hand on his arm once again. He closed his eyes, took a few deep breaths and looked over his shoulder. "Armie, please"  
   "I'm not gonna go after you again, Timothée, but you know just as much as I do that there are a lot of things left for us to discuss. So if you happen to change your mind, this is where I am staying". He slipped the hotel's business card into the back pocket of Timothée jeans and let go of his arm.  
   Armie watched as Timothée slowly walked down the alley and he couldn't help but feel a pain shot through his chest. He couldn't bear the idea of losing Timothée forever.

 

                                *****

 

   The door closed behind Timothée with a loud thud. The brunette's body was shaking from head to toe, he could feel his muscles burn and his heart pound on his chest. His head was filled with thoughts of Armie and Jason, memories of him with both of them clouding his vision. He desperately needed to focus his mind and body on something else.  
   He tossed his phone on the bed and made his way to the bathroom, his clothes scattered through the ground in the process. He closed his eyes as the cold water hit his body, a heavy sigh leaving him as he tried to calm himself down. Timothée wished he could wash away all the thoughts inside of him for a couple of seconds, but he simply couldn't find the strength in him to do so. Soon enough he found himself running his hands through his wet body, his breathing slightly heavier and a tingling sensation running through him.  
   _Jason_  
 _Armie_  
 _Jason_  
 _Armie_  
 _Armie_  
 _Jason_  
 _Armie_  
 _Armie_  
 _Armie_  
 _Armie_  
 _Armie_  
   "Armie". The moan echoed on the bathroom as Timothée leaned his hand against the tile wall. He bit his lip, sucking on the already swollen flesh as he twisted his wrist, his hand vigorously pumping his throbbing cock. His breathing got hasty, shivers ran down his spine and his knees nearly gave in. "Fuck...", he muttered, fucking himself on his hand as he felt his muscles clench and his cock twitch. He shot his load all over the bathroom floor as he let out a sigh, feeling his body relax for the first time that night.  
   Timothée left the bathroom naked and with a look of shame in his eyes. He looked around the mess of his apartment and sighed as he saw the screen of his phone light up. He reached for it, biting his lip as he saw Jason's text.

   _Miss you. Can't wait to see you on Monday. How was dinner?_  
    
   His eyes remained on the text for a few seconds before he tossed his phone back on the bed. Timothée walked around the apartment, collecting his clothes until he saw the business card lying on the floor.  
  He picked up and instantly could hear Armie's voice on his ear. So if you happen to change your mind, this is where I'm staying. Timothée pulled on his jeans and sweatshirt, put the card back on his pocket and reached for his keys. He was tired of lying to himself, this was a losing battle and was done fighting.

 

                               *****

 

   Armie had his eyes closed as the warm water run down his naked body. He let out a sigh, feeling his muscles relax after a night that could only be described as a rollercoaster ride.  
   He pushed his damp hair back and stepped out of the shower. He quickly dried himself as he heard a loud knock on the door.  
   Armie groaned and put on his slippers, making his way out of the bathroom and to the door. He rolled his eyes as the knocking continued, but felt a smile appear on his lip as he saw Timothée standing there.  
   "Hi", said Armie softly.  
   "Can I come in?"  
   Armie nodded. "Always"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Didn't you guys just love that ending?


	13. Come Undone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie lets Timothée inside his hotel room and it's time for the brunette to decide what he wants.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song tittle comes from Duran Duran's song Come Undone. Simon Lebon said this is a song about sex....take your own conclusions

   Armie closed the door behind him as his eyes wandered to Timothée. He knew him well enough to recognize the look; he was nervous and probably doubting showing up there was actually a good idea.  
   "You want something to drink" asked Armie, trying to ease the tension that had taken over the room.  
   Timothée simply shook his head. He looked around the place for a while before he gathered enough courage to turn around and look Armie in the eye.  
   "Am I stupid for being here?"  
   "What? No, of course you're not stupid, Timothée"  
   "Really? Cause until this afternoon I was willing to make my relationship with Jason work. I was ready to forget you and move on with my life and it only took one night, hell not even that, it only took me a few minutes and a couple of shared words for me to throw it all away and come after you. That sounds like stupidity to me"  
   "To me that sounds like being in love"  
   Timothée bit his lip, shaking his head as he took a few steps further. Their bodies were close now, their breathing slightly more labored as Timothée tried to study Armie and figure out what he was thinking, what he was feeling.  
   "What do you know about being in love, Hammer?"  
   "I know it wrecks you. I know it makes you do crazy things. I know it causes you pain when the one you love ignores you. I know sometimes it takes time for one to even realize he is in love. But I also know it makes you feel good, it makes you feel whole"  
  _I know it causes you pain when the one you love ignores you_. Timothée blinked a couple of times, his mind trying to process what he just heard. Was Armie talking about him? Was Armie confessing he loved him?  
   Armie let out a chuckle as he saw Timothée's expression and shook his head. "You don't get it, do you? You can't see how much you mean to me. You can't see I've been in love with you since I saw you sitting by the piano, the way you looked at me...there, right there was the moment I fell for you. I don't blame you though, it took me losing you to gain the courage to admit that to myself"  
   Timothée couldn't hold back a smile as his shaky hands rested on Armie's chest; he slowly let them slid up to the back of his neck, his fingers curling on his short hair. "I hate you", he whispered as Armie smirked, his hands resting on Timothée's waist.  
   "No, you don't"  
   Armie leaned his head closer to Timothée, but didn't go all the way. He would let Timothée take charge of the situation, whatever happened between them that night would be because Timothée wanted it to happen.  
   Timothée stared at Armie's eyes as he stood on his toes, a sly smile taking over him as he pressed their lips together. The kiss was soft, slow and tender, different from any other kiss they had shared. For a moment it wasn't about hunger and desire, it was about mutual love.  
   They pulled apart for a few seconds, but only to take deep breaths. Soon their lips were together again, moving in perfect synchrony as their hands roamed through each other's bodies and the kiss grew more intense. Low moans could be heard through the kiss and their bodies shivered at each other's touch. The love and desire emanating from them was almost palpable.  
   They stumbled around the room, Timothée's clothes and Armie's towel soon were thrown to the ground. They fell down the bed with Timothée on top, their cocks rubbing together, their lips kissing and sucking on every skin they could find. They had been dreaming on this moment for far too long.  
   Timothée grinded their groins together, smirking as Armie moaned his name. He missed hearing his name in that husky, breathless voice more than he could ever explain.  
   He placed soft open mouthed kisses down Armie's chest, his hands rubbing his sides. Timothée looked up at Armie as he wrapped his hand around his erection, giving one painfully slow stroke, which made Armie's entire body shudder.  
   Timothée kissed Armie's inner thighs, moving up and sucking on the flesh close to his balls. Their eyes locked once again and Timothée licked the whole length of his cock, swirling his tongue around the swollen head.  
   "I've missed this" he whispered, his tongue teasing the head as Armie groaned.  
   "Fuck, Timmy"  
   Timothée smiled, his eyes glazed over as he stuck two fingers inside his mouth, sucking on them as Armie bit his lip. Timothée's fingers circled around Armie's hole, applying just a little bit of pressure; the blond hissed, his legs spreading wider as Timothée smirked. When his slick fingers slowly made their way inside, Timothée gave slow thrusts, watching fascinated as Armie threw his head back.  
   "So tight", he whispered before enveloping his lips around Armie's cock. He sucked on the head, taking his time to explore every single inch of it before he started taking more in, bobbing his head up and down.  
   Armie was stirring underneath Timothée, arching his back as his fingers dug on the soft white sheets. His moans encouraged Timothée, who relaxed his throat, allowing Armie's cock to go in deeper inside his mouth.  
   Timothée wrapped his free hand around his own cock, stroking the pulsating shaft in a slow pace. He was hard as a rock, desperate to feel himself sliding inside Armie's warm and tight hole. The thought caused him to moan around Armie's shaft, the vibration making the blond tremble from head to toe.  
   "F-Fuck, Timothée"  
   Armie's fingers knotted on Timothee's curls, pushing him further down. He licked his lips, eyes focused on the brunette, who gagged and drooled all over his dick. Armie had to do everything to keep himself from coming.  
   Armie's cock left Timothee's mouth with a loud and obscene slurping sound. The brunette smiled, licking his lips before he buried his face in between Armie's legs, his tongue joining his fingers. Armie let out a loud growl and Timothée couldn't help but chuckle; he still knew exactly what to do to get Armie on the mood.  
   Timothée hovered on top of Armie, his puffed lips leaving wet kisses on the older man's neck and Adam's apple. He moaned softly as Armie's hands moved to his ass, rubbing and squeezing it.  
   "Where's the...", he whispered on Armie's ear.  
   "We don't need it"  
   Timothée looked down at him, arching an eyebrow. "Armie..."  
   "We didn't need it before, we don't need it now. Just trust me, okay?"  
   Timothée grinned, his hand sliding down his torso to his aching cock and guided to Armie's hole. Their lips connected in an intense, powerful kiss just as the first few inches of Timothee's cock breached inside of Armie.  
   Armie curled his fingers on Timothee's soft curls as he wrapped his legs around his hips, pulling him closer. He pulled on Timothee's lower lip, his back arching as he felt the brunette slid further inside.  
   Timothée started with gentle thrusts, his smooth chest rubbing against Armie's hairy one. As he buried himself deep inside of Armie, a loud moan escaped his lips and his thrusts gained a new momentum.  
   The moans and the smell of sweat filled the room, with his eyes closed and low moans escaping him, Armie dug his nails onto Timothee's back, causing the brunette to thrust harder and faster.  
   Timothée leaned his forehead against Armie's, one hand stroking the older man's cock and the other tracing his swollen and red lips. Their eyes met as their breathing turned hasty, their stare so intense it only seemed to increase their pleasure.  
   "Fuck me, Timmy", said Armie in between moans. "I'm almost there"  
   The sound of Armie moaning his name would always be one of Timothee's biggest turn on, and to hear him begging to be fucked was almost too much to bear. He squeezed Armie's cock, his fingers brushing against the sensitive head as Armie hissed and trembled.  
   "Cum for me, Armie"  
   "S-shit!"  
   Armie threw his head back, a loud moan escaping him as thick ropes of cum erupted from his dick, landing on his chest and stomach. His body shuddered as he closed his eyes, falling into post-orgasmic bliss.  
   The sight was enough to bring Timothée to the edge, he swiftly pulled out of Armie and wrapped his hand tightly around his throbbing cock. He stroked it vigorously, feeling his entire body burning in anticipation for an earth-shattering orgasm.  
   Armie held onto his thighs, from his crimson lips words of encouragement, which caused Timothée to let out a throaty loud moan.  
   "Fuck", he muttered through clenched theeth as he sank his fingers into Armie's shoulder. His body shook from head to toe, a tingling sensation on the pitch of his stomach as he felt his orgasm wash over him and his cum shoot all over Armie's stomach.  
   Panting, Timothée let his sweaty body collapse on top of Armie. The blond tightly wrapped his arms around him, his face buried on the crook of Timothee's neck as they both tried to control their breathing.  
   They looked at one another a few seconds later, laughing at the mess they made of themselves, but also rejoicing the bliss of being in each other's arms once again.  
   "I've missed this", whispered Timothée as he run his finger up and down Armie's arms. "I've missed you"  
   Armie smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind Timothee's ear. "I've missed you too"


	14. Everything's Gonna Be Fine Fine Fine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is the morning after and Armie decides it's time to talk to Timothée about his situation. Later on the guys try to make it up for the time apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They are still in New York and the smut is still here.  
> Tittle comes from Alanis song "Hand in my Pocket"

   The smell of coffee took over the room as Timothée stirred on the bed. He reached for Armie, trying to get closer to his lover, but found nothing but emptiness. He let out a soft groan and turned around, his eyes flickering open and a small smile appearing on his lips. Armie was standing by the window, a serious look on his face as he watched the city bellow. That very moment Timothée realized how much he missed waking up to the sight of Armie.  
   "Good morning", he whispered.  
   Armie turned around, a smile appearing on his face as he looked at Timothée, who by now was sitting on the bed, wrapping the sheets around his body. He walked over to the bed, crawled to Timothée and placed a soft kiss on his lips while also tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.  
   "Good morning. I ordered room service, there's coffee, bagels with cream cheese and chocolate croissants"  
   "My favorites"  
   Armie nodded as he got up, pulling Timothée up with him. He handed the brunette his boxers and watched as he put it on before wrapping his arms around him and leaning down for yet another kiss. Timothée held onto Armie's arms, his body succumbing into the older man's touch as he deepened the kiss, a low moan escaping him.  
   Reluctant, Armie pulled away from Timothée,  his tongue tracing his own lips, savoring the taste of the brunette. He leaned their foreheads together, his thumbs rubbing Timothee's cheeks.  
   "C'mon, we gotta eat...and talk"  
   Timothée groaned as he followed Armie to the small table by the window. He knew they had to talk,  but he also wished they could stay there on that little bubble they had created; no worries and no real life, just them.   
   He poured himself some coffee and reached for a bagel, taking a few bites of it before he noticed Armie looking at him. "What?"  
   "Someone's hungry"  
   "Your fault", he said as Armie chuckled, shaking his head. "So, what exactly are we gonna talk about? The fact I cheated on my perfect boyfriend or the fact that I just couldn't keep myself away from you, even if it means going back to the sidelines?"  
   "We can talk about Jason if you want, if you think it will make you feel better. But what I really wanted to talk to you about was something else, something on my side of the story"  
   "Just say it Armie, I can handle it. God knows I've already been through too much to care anymore"  
   "After the fundraiser, after that kiss we shared and you ignoring me, I started to think about my life and I decided I had to do something to change, something that could fix part of the mess I've made. So I talked to Nick, he helped me a lot in the last few weeks, and I also talked to Elizabeth. We discussed our situation and I told her I want the divorce"  
   "You did what?!"  
   "Not such a coward, huh?"  
   Timothée sighed. "You know I didn't mean that, I was..."  
   "You were right, I was a coward. I didn't accept my own feelings and I was scared of yours. I was a coward and maybe I still am, because I'm terrified of what's gonna happen next"  
   Timothée shook his head, his hand reaching for Armie's. "You have all the right to be terrified, Armie. Things are gonna change and it might not be easy, but you need to know that no matter what happens, I will be here for you. I'll always be here for you, no matter what you decide to do"  
   "What if I don't know what to do?"  
   "What?"  
   "I have been hiding who I really am for almost seventeen years, Timothée. I know that I've done the right thing asking for the divorce, I know I did the right thing by coming here and telling you what I feel, but I don't know what else to do. I'm stuck in the middle of all these questions and fears and apart from the fact I want to be with you, everything else is blurred"  
   Timothée sighed, a small smile on his lips as he made his way to Armie. He kneeled down in front of the blond, holding onto one of his hands as the other cradled his face.  
   "Armie,  accepting yourself and your feelings is already a huge step you are taking. You don't have to pressure yourself to do anything in a rush, you can take your time, figure things out as it goes. You are not obligated to come out to anyone, okay? When I said those things back then, I was angry and sad, I didn't mean to hurt you or make you feel any less than you are. Everyone experiences things in a different way and you have to figure out your own way"  
   "But that's not fair to you"  
   "What do I have to do with this?"  
   "Everything. Not coming out means our relationship has to stay hidden and that's not fair to you"  
   Timothée sat down on Armie's lap, his arms wrapping around the older man's neck as he smiled. "Armie, we don't have to expose our relationship to anyone. This is something between you and I, maybe friends and family, but the world doesn't have to know. Mainly because it doesn't concern anyone but us, and as long as we're both okay with the situation, then it's all good"  
   Armie leaned their foreheads together, his hands stroking Timothee's back. "And you are sure you are okay with this?"  
   "Yes. Besides, you are going through a divorce and we should be on the down-low, the last thing you, Elizabeth and the kids need now is even more gawking eyes watching your every move"  
   "I don't deseve you", whispered Armie.  
   "Let me be the one to decide that, okay?" Timothée smiled, leaning in close so their lips could touch in a sweet and loving kiss.

 

                                  *******

   Timothée hissed and stirred, his knees and forearms supporting him up, his face buried in the pillows and his knuckles pale as his fingers dug into the mattress. He was sweating, electrical waves of pleasure running through his body and his muscles were on fire.  
   Armie's tongue explored his hole with powerful will, but with enough patience to make sure every single spot was taken care of. His fingertips slowly traced Timothee's swollen cock, teasing the younger man and driving him closer and closer to his orgasm.  
   Timothée gasped into the pillow as he felt one of Armie's large hands on his asscheeks, rubbing, squeezing, pinching and slapping. His body shuddered and he had to bite down on the pillow to supress a loud moan from escaping him as Armie's tongue ran from the tip of his cock to the center of his puckered hole.  
   Timothée was trembling and Armie loved it. He wrapped his hand around the younger's cock, twisting his wrist as he gave the shaft slow strokes, making precum ooze out of it. He bit each one of Timothee's asscheeks and slapped it right after it, smiling down at the younger man, who tried his best to keep himself quiet.  
   Slowly and sensually, Armie let his hands run down Timothee's body, feeling every single inch of his feverish skin. He grinned as he pressed himself on Timothée, his swollen erection nestled in between the brunette's asscheeks; his sweaty chest pressed on Timothee's back and as his fingers knotted on the young man's dark, lucious curls, he yanked his head back.  
   A tamed gasp left Timothée and he quickly bit his lip. His instructions were very clear; no moans, no growls, no gasps, he had to remain quiet until Armie said otherwise. Timothée had no intentions on breaking that rule. He sighed in content as Armie's lips traced his neck and the back of his ear, his knees almost giving in when he heard the husky, sensual voice on his ear.  
   "You can moan now"  
   Timothée only nodded. He pushed himself back, slowly rubbing himself on Armie's erection. He smiled proudly as he heard the blond moan on his ear, just as his large hand wrapped around his neck.  
   "Tell me what you want", whispered Armie.  
   "I want you inside of me"  
   "You're gonna need more than this, Timmy"  
   "I want you to fuck me. I want you to fuck me as hard as you can"  
   "Now we're talking"  
   Timothée groaned, pushing his ass to Armie's body, desperately seeking some action, some friction. He had lost track of time, Timothée wasn't sure if they were there for five minutes or an hour. All he knew is that he needed Armie like he had never needed before.  
   "Please, just fuck me"  
   "Begging already?"  
   "I'm fucking desperate here, Armie. I need to feel you inside of me. Please"  
    Armie smirked. He spread Timothee's legs wider and guided his cock to his hole, teasing it. Timothée let out a breath, his hands turned into fists and Armie nearly laughed at how desperate he looked.  
   "Are you ready?"  
   "You know I am"  
   Armie bit his lip, his nails digging on the soft and pale flesh of Timothee's ass as he entered him. They both gasped, the feeling so familiar and at the same time so new. Armie moved slowly at first, savoring the tightness that surrounded his dick each inch be penetrated.  
   "Armie....", hissed Timothée as he felt Armie go balls deep inside of him. He breathed heavily as Armie stood still, soft moans leaving them both as they took their time to enjoy the sensation.  
   Armie started moving with long and poweful thrusts, his moans increasing each time he drove himself deep inside Timothée.  
   The sound of their bodies clashing together became louder by the second, Armie's powerful thrusts taking them to a new realm of pleasure. It was intense, it was overwhelming and exactly what they wanted, what they needed.  
   Timothée threw his head back, his body moving back to meet Armie's thrusts. The sweat was now coating his body, his hair clinging on his forehead and his ass clenching around Armie's cock.  
   Armie groaned, his fingers knotting on Timothee's curls. He wrapped an arm around the brunette's waist and pulled him close, their bodies now pressed together as Armie nibbled on his ear.  
   "I'm so close", whispered Timothée, his hand reaching out for Armie's thigh, holding on to it. "So so close"  
   Armie hummed on his ear, his hand sliding down to Timothee's cock. He tugged on it and stroked it slowly as Timothée's body shivered.  
   "Cum for me, Timmy" whispered Armie, his thrusts never stopping as his hand teased the swollen head. "Cum all over my hand, babe"  
   Timothee's lips quivered, his head resting on Armie's shoulder as he felt his balls tighten and his cock throb. He let out a loud moan, cum erupting from his cock, coating Armie's hand and the sheets.  
   Armie moaned loud as Timothée's ass squeezed his cock. He gave a few more thrusts, feeling the brunette's body practically go limp on him.  
   He pulled out, smiling as Timothée protested and turned him around, pushing Timothée to the bed on his back.  Their eyes locked as Armie pumped his shaft, quick strokes as he trembled, his muscles clenching, his knees giving in just as he exploded. His cum landed on Timothee's chest, the brunette bitting his lip as he intensively watched the scene.  
   Armie hovered on top of Timothée, their lips locking in a wet, passionate and rough kiss. Timothée wrapped his arms around Armie, pulling him down to him, their bodies touching and their chest rubbing together.  
   "I think we need a shower", whispered Timothée in between kisses.  
   Armie chuckled, rubbing Timothee's arms. "I think it's highly necessary"  
   "Will you join me?"  
   "You shouldn't even be asking that". Armie got up, taking Timothee's hand in his and pulled the brunette up. Timothée smiled, wrapping his arms around Armie's neck as they stumbled their way to the bathroom.


	15. It's A Fluke

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Sunday and the boys are doing their best to enjoy their last day together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some domestic fluffness on their last day together. Lara, this is the chapter you've been waiting for a while, enjoy the "pillow ass".

   The sound of thunders reverberated and the lightning illuminated the grey New York sky. The incessant rain drenched the usually crowded streets, that were now quiet and nearly empty.  
   Secluded in the warm hotel room, Armie lied on the bed, his breathing calm and cadenced as he slept peacefully on the bed. His head was buried on the pillows as he lied on his stomach, his naked body fully exposed.  
    Timothée had been awake for a while. He had spent long hours thinking about him and Armie, how their relationship would go from that moment on and how exactly he would deal with the consequences of that weekend. If that had not been enough, the loud thunders had made sure he kept waking up constantly and after seven in the morning, he simply gave up trying to get any more sleep.  
   With Armie's phone in hand, Timothée sat down on the bed, his body shifting from side to side as he tried to get into a more comfortable position. He let out a frustrated sigh, his eyes looking around the room until it landed on Armie's naked body.  
   Timothée smirked as he lied across the bed, his head resting on Armie's smooth, round ass. He smiled to himself as he adjusted his head to a more comfortable position. Maybe Timothée was too caught up in his love for Armie, but the older man's ass truly felt more comfortable than all the pillows in that hotel room.  
   He gave Armie a quick look from the corner of his eyes and bit his lip. The main remained asleep, his breathing still calm and a peaceful expression on his face that Timothée hadn't seen in a long time.  
   He returned his attention to the phone, scrolling through an article about Armie and why the fact he had been casted for Straight White Men was a good thing. Timothée felt proud of the older man, he felt like now people were starting to see his true talent and that warmed his heart.  
   He felt Armie stir underneath him and let his eyes wonder to him. A smile appeared on his lips as he saw Armie blink a couple of times, adjusting to the low light and trying to adjust his body to the extra weight on him.  
    Armie looked over his shoulder and arched an eyebrow. "What the hell are you doing, Timmy?"  
   Timothée grinned as he heard his husky, low and still sleepy voice. "I'm reading"  
   "Okay, then tell me why you're doing it while you use my ass as a pillow"  
    "Because it's comfortable. I was having a hard time with all these pillows and then I looked at you and saw this beautiful, smooth ass just begging to be used. I couldn't say no"  
    Armie laughed as he shook his head. Timothée truly was something out of this world, his personality was so unique and so charming, he couldn't even understand how it took him so long to figure out how much he truly loved the younger man. Only a fool wouldn't fall in love with Timothée.  
    "Well, can I please have my ass back? I can barely feel my face here"  
    "But it's so comfortable"  
    "And I promise you I'll let you use it again soon, but please just let me turn around"  
     Timothée nodded his head and moved to get up, but only after biting softly on the flesh of Armie's asscheek, which made the older man wince. He smiled at the noise and gave the cheek a quick slap, before he sat down straight and allowed Armie to turn around, their eyes meeting for the first time that day.  
    "Morning", said Armie with a smile as he pulled Timothée down on top of him. "You can't imagine the happiness I feel to wake up with you. Even when you are using my ass as a pillow"  
    Timothée chuckled, placing a soft kiss on Armie's lips. "I plan on doing that a lot from now on, so you better get used to"  
    "I will try my best"  
    Timothée closed his eyes as he rested his head on Armie's chest, hearing the older man's heart beat and feeling his warmth. He let out a sigh of contentment as he felt Armie's strong arms wrap around his slender body. He felt safe and protected.  
    "I hope you don't mind, but I borrowed your phone. I realized today I left mine at my apartment on Friday and I had to check on my e-mails, make sure the world is still in one piece outside the walls of this room"  
    Armie hummed, his hands rubbing Timothee's back. "Is okay, you can borrow whenever you want. Got anything important?"  
   Timothée could hear the change in his tone and bit his lip. As he looked up, their eyes locked and they exchanged a shy smile. "You wanna know if I got any e-mails from Jason?"  
    "Well yeah"  
    "No, I haven't, but I am sure there will be countless messages and voicemails. Just like you have from Elizabeth"  
    "Yeah, I saw it, but I'll deal with her rage once I get back home"  
    "Have you thought about what you are going to do if she doesn't agree to sign the papers?"  
    "I know this is a possible situation, but I rather think Elizabeth is smarter and more sensible than this. We have an option on doing this the easy way or the hard way, I think she will understand that our kids don't deserve to go through things the hard way"  
    As Timothée nodded, Armie smiled and rolled them over on the bed. He hovered on top of the younger man, his large hands tightly pressed on his hips, his lips placing soft kisses on his neck. He smiled as he heard a low and tamed moan leave Timothée and raised his head, his eyes taking in the beauty that was the brunette. His lover, his partner, his Timothée.  
    Timothée smiled up at him, his arms and legs wrapping around Armie as he pulled the older man down, their lips crashing together, moving in total synchrony as they shared a sweet and loving kiss.

 

                                    *****

   Armie sat down on the bed, phone in hand as he scrolled through all the messages he had received in the last 48 hours. There were texts from his agent, from Nick and of course, a countless number of texts and voicemails from Elizabeth. He chose to ignore all of them, not really in the mood for any kind of drama when he was having such a great time with Timothée. The longer they could stay on their little bubble the better.  
    The moment he heard the bathroom door open, Armie looked up from his phone, a smile on his lips as he watched Timothée emerge from the fogged bathroom while putting on his sweater. He smirked, placing the phone down and crossed his arms, appreciating the sight in front of him.  
   "I believe that's my sweater, or do you plan on stealing that one too?"  
   Timothée looked up at him, a grin on his face. "I have never stolen anything from you"  
   "Yeah right, so my black and white sweater has miraculously disappeared?"  
   "You can be quite messy, Mr. Hammer"  
   Timothée chuckled as Armie shot him a dirty look. He threw the towel he used to dry his hair to the ground and made his way over to the bed, crawling over to Armie. He hovered on top of the older man, his nose brushing against Armie's neck and jaw. He bit his lip as he rubbed their noses together, feeling Armie's hands rest on his arms.  
   They smiled at one another, eyes locked and lips teasingly brushing against one another only to separate quickly after. Timothée was loving every single second of their weekend together and he wanted to cherish it in the best way possible, he knew once Armie was back in Los Angeles they would have to settle for a less touchy relationship.  
   Armie leaned closer to Timothée -who closed his eyes in anticipation for a kiss- and let his hands run down to his stomach, attacking him with tickles. Timothée gasped in surprise, curling himself on top of Armie as he tried to get away from his grip. Armie laughed loud, pushing Timothée onto the mattress as he tickled him on every single bit of skin he could find.  
   The brunette trashed underneath him, his face flushed and his breathing hasty. He was desperate, laughing, crying and gasping for air, all the while still trying to break away from Armie's grip. To Armie it was a heavenly sight that took him back to their nights in Crema. He remembered how they would go back to his apartment after dinner with Luca, watch a movie, but always end up rolling around on the floor, first him tickling Timothée, which then would lead to them wrestling.  
   Armie was happy to know those days were back.  
   "Stop. Please. Stop", said Timothée in between giggles. He gasped for air once again, but felt his body relax as Armie came to a stop. He sighed, closing his eyes for a second, before opening them up again to meet Armie's gaze. "That was just mean"  
   Armie smirked, straddling Timothee's tights and pinning his arms above his head. He held onto his wrists with one hand, while the other roamed inside his sweater, Timothee's sweater. He watched as the brunette moved his head slightly, his eyes wandering to his pinned hands as he bit his lip. Armie knew Timothée enjoyed this position just as much as he did.  
    "What you thinking", asked Armie as Timothée looked back at him, his pink tongue tracing his bottom lip. Armie groaned, putting some pressure down on their bodies, feeling his groin rub against Timothee's.  
   "I'm thinking about how much I want you to tie me up and use me"  
   Armie hissed. "You are one horny man, aren't you?"  
   "Like you are any different". As he said this, Timothée thrust his hips forward, rubbing himself against Armie, who closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. "We both love sex way too much and this is one of the many reasons why we love each other"  
   When Armie opened his eyes again, they were glazed, filled with lust. He leaned down, his lips on Timothee's neck, sucking hard on the skin as the brunette moaned loud. Armie chuckled, nibbled on Timothee's ear and smiled as he whispered. "If being tied up and used is what you want, then your wish is my command, Mr. Chalamet"  
  

                                 ******

    Armie had his eyes focused on the window as he lied down on the bed, his and Timothee's legs were tangled and his arms tightly wrapped around the brunette, who had his face buried on the crook of his neck.  
    Outside the rain kept on falling, lightning and thunder still taking over the sky. It was nearly nine and as the hours passed, Armie felt a pain shoot through his whole body. After all the time they spent apart, that weekend had turned out to be way more than he could have predicted and he suddenly didn't want to leave Timothee's side. He didn't want to go back to the place he called home, simply because now Timothée was his home.  
    He let his finger brush against Timothee's skin, drawing imaginary patterns as Timothée hummed something he couldn't quite comprehend.  
    Timothée snuggled closer to Armie and smiled as he took in the older man's scent. Once he looked up, his eyes wandered to every single detail on Armie's face, his fingers tracing the blond's lips, cheeks and eyebrows. He wanted to look at him as much as he could, keep the memory fresh as he knew the next couple of days wouldn't be easy.  
    "What time is your flight", asked Timothée.  
    "At 7am"  
    Timothée groaned. "That's too early"  
    "I know it is and I wish I could stay longer, but I have a a meeting with my lawyer tomorrow afternoon"  
    "I know, it's okay"  
    "Besides, Jason comes back tomorrow and you need to be there when he walks through your door"  
    "I can't even imagine how painful it will be. I am such a horrible person, he didn't deserve to go through this"  
    Armie sighed, stroking Timothee's back. "I'm sorry for making you feel this way. I know you care about him and I know you didn't want to hurt him"  
    "You don't have to apologize, Armie. If I am here with you is because I wanted to, you didn't force me to do anything. I did this and I have to learn how to deal with the consequences"  
    Armie nodded, placing a soft kiss on his forehead. "I want you to call me once you talk to him, I want to make sure you're okay"  
    "What", asked Timothée, his eyesbrows furrowed. "He's not gonna do anything to harm me, Armie"  
    "I know that, okay? But I also know you and you will be left feeling terrible after everything is said and done. So please, call me after you talk to him"  
    "I will"  
    Timothée smiled as he locked eyes with Armie. He was overwhelmed with bliss, the amount of happiness he had felt that weekend was something he couldn't describe. But at the same time, Timothée couldn't help but dread the idea that once back in Los Angeles -next to his kids and Elizabeth-, Armie could change his mind and decide it was better to maintain his marriage.  
    Timothée knew if that happened, he would never be able to recover himself.  
    "Hey, what's going on? Why you're suddenly so serious?"  
    Timothée shrugged his shoulders, choosing not to ruin that moment with his insecurities. "I was wondering when we'll see each other again"  
    "I have to be here for rehearsals in two weeks. I can try, but I'm not sure I'll be able to come here anytime sooner than that". As Timothée nodded, a sad look on his face, Armie tightened his grip around the brunette and leaned their foreheads together. "We'll have to settle for phone calls, texts and Facetime, but we can make it"  
    Timothée nodded. "Nothing we haven't done before"  
    Armie smiled, stroking Timothee's cheek. "I don't want you to worry about anything, okay? We're gonna be fine"


	16. Rolling in the Deep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie goes back to Los Angeles, while Timothée stays in New York and comes face to face with Jason again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're back!!!! Our boys are together, but that doesn't mean the angst is gone....we're gonna have frustrated ex wife, mad ex boyfriend, kids, "evil" mothers and Straight White Men. Things are gonna be good.

The sky was still grey, but the rain and thunder had come to a stop. Inside the warm and dark hotel room, Timothée lied under the covers, his body spread around the double bed and his face buried in the pillow.  
He moved around on the bed, a low groan escaping him as his eyes flickered open. Timothée let out a sigh as he saw the empty bed and leaning on his elbows, he looked around the room, his green eyes darting to the clock by the nightstand. On the screen he saw 9:30 in big block numbers and cursed at himself for not waking up to kiss Armie goodbye.  
Once he lied back, Timothée chuckled as he saw a sweater perfectly folded on the pillow next to him and a piece of paper attached to it. He reached for it, his eyes scanning through the note as a bright smile appeared on his face.

  
_Thought you'd like to keep it as a souvenir._  
 _Hope to see you again soon._  
 _Don't forget to call._  
 _Love, Armie._

  
Timothée bit his lip as he stared at the sweater. It sure would help him keep the memory of their weekend alive until they could actually see each other again. With a deep breath, he sat up on the bed and took one last look around the room, before heading to the bathroom. It was time to face reality, it was time to go back home.

*****

Armie closed the door behind him with a sigh. After six hours on a plane all he wanted was to sit down, drink something and relax, but he knew better than this. No one knew Elizabeth better than Armie and if the countless messages she left during the weekend were any indication, she would still try to revert the situation. Not because she was trying to make things harder for him -although that was still a possibility-, but because until now she truly believed that was still something left to be saved.  
He quietly made his way around the house, placing his bag on the floor as he looked around the place. No sign of the kids, the nanny or Elizabeth herself. This unsettled him, but he tried not to think too much about it. He walked to the kitchen, poured himself a glass of water, and drank it all in one gulp.  
"Armie, is that you?"  
Her voice caught him off guard and he had to take a deep breath to prepare himself for what was about to come. Armie turned around, watching as she made her way down the stairs, a small smile on her lips.  
"I was waiting for you to come home", she said softly as she made her way towards him. She wrapped her slender arms around him, her face buried on the crook of his neck as he simply stood still, hands to his sides and head spinning.  
"Elizabeth, please...."  
"I told the nanny to go to the park with the kids so we could have more privacy"  
"Elizabeth..."  
As she kept her grip on him, Armie let out a frustrated sigh. He wanted to do things the right way, he wanted to be gentle and kind. He had no intentions on hurting Elizabeth more than he already had, but he needed to do something about this, he couldn't let her control the situation. Not anymore.  
He grabbed a hold of her wrists, pulling her arms away from him and pushed her away. As he did that he could see her expression change a little bit, but still she managed to maintain a small smile on her face. The perfect wife facade was still going strong.  
"Please, stop doing this"  
"Stop doing what?"  
"The hug, the sweet voice, the whole....the whole we're gonna be fine thing"  
She rolled her eyes, slowly her true emotions were coming to the surface. "Are you still thinking about that nonsense?"  
"If by nonsense you mean our divorce, then yes I am"  
"I thought this weekend away would be good for you, it would clear your mind and help you understand how stupid this is"  
"Funny enough I thought the exact same about you. I thought the weekend would help you understand the current situation we are in. You know as well as I do that our marriage has failed and yet you keep lying to yourself, you keep telling yourself everything is gonna be fine in the end and that things will go back to normal"  
"Maybe if you didn't throw it all away, maybe if you had given us a chance, instead of running to your lawyers and asking for a divorce, maybe we could get things back to normal. But what did you do, Armie? You threw it all away, you sound like all we've been through doesn't matter"  
"That's not true, Elizabeth. Our friendship, our marriage, our kids and the life we built together meant the world to me"  
"So why you're willing to give up on everything?"  
"Because....". Armie looked down at his feet as he took a few deep breaths. He hated to do this, he hated that he actually had to say those words, but it seemed like she would never understand if he didn't. "Because we need more than companionship to make a relationship work. We need respect and we need love and...and to be completely honest with you, I don't love you anymore"  
Armie could easily see the mix of emotions on Elizabeth's face. She was broken, she was surprised and she was mad, mad in a way he couldn't remember seeing her yet. Her eyes were stuck on his as she run her fingers through her hair, she was desperately trying to find something to say, but right now it seemed like everything she ever knew had been erased from her memory. She was left empty and numb.  
Armie wanted to hug her, tell her everything was going to be okay, but he knew quite well that doing this would only make her angrier. Right now she needed to process what he had just said.  
"I'm sorry", he finally said, desperate to break the dreadful silent that had filled the air around us.  
"You think sorry helps? You say you don't love me and you expect your pathetic sorry will make it all better? What the fuck is wrong with you?"  
The cursing was enough for Armie to understand she had for once let down all her walls. This was the Elizabeth underneath all those layers of makeup -the metaphorical and the real one-, the Elizabeth he met years ago.  
"What do you expect me to say? I'm trying to be honest with you, I'm trying to do this the best possible way"  
She shook her head. "I don't care about your honesty, Armie. Right now I can barely look you in the eye"  
"I'm so sorry, I never meant this to happen, but I..."  
"Leave, Armie!"  
"What?"  
"Leave my house right now"  
"I want to see my kids"  
"You can do that some other time", she said, her eyebrows arching. "Think of it as practice"  
Armie knew there was no point in even trying, the best thing he could do right now was leave. He made his way to the living room, grabbing his bags on the way and gave her one last look. He knew he was hurting Elizabeth, he knew this whole situation was a mess, but it was the right thing to do.

****

Timothée lied quietly on the bed, his green eyes stuck on the ceiling, his phone in his hand and next to him Armie's sweater. He had been lost in thought for a couple of minutes, wondering exactly how he would approach the subject with Jason.  
Timothée knew it wouldn't be an easy conversation, he knew Jason would be left hurt, but it was too late for that now. He had made a mistake -although he did not regret anything that had happened between him and Armie- and it was time to face the consequences of this. He had been honest with Jason all this time, he couldn't change it now.  
In the silence of his building, it didn't take long for Timothée to hear the footsteps and the sound of keys outside his door. He inhaled deeply, swiftly getting on his feet and paced around the room, trying to let out some of the tension he had inside of him.  
Jason walked inside the apartment with a tired look upon his face. He had been stuck in a plane for hours, he had barely gotten any sleep on the previous night and to top it all, Timothee's silence over the weekend had left him worried.  
He placed his bags down on the floor, his eyes locked on Timothée, who had his back turned to him. He kept himself quiet, trying to decipher whatever was going on with Timothée.  
"I was worried about you. I've been trying to talk to you since Friday night and you've been completely silent. For a moment I thought something wrong happened"  
Timothée sighed, shaking his head -more at himself than anything else- and turned to face Jason. His eyes were sad and teary as he watched Jason take a couple of steps closer to him.  
"Timothée, you're scaring me, what's going on?"  
"We need to talk, Jason"  
He nodded. "Okay, so let's talk. There's anything in particular you want to talk about?"  
"Armie"  
"Armie?" His voice was shaky and his eyebrows furrowed. "Why you wanna talk about Armie?"  
Timothée sighed, his eyes down to his feet as he tried to keep himself together. "Armie was in New York for the weekend.  He came here for work, end up running into Peter and Brian and they invited him for dinner on Friday"  
Jason let out a breath, a mix of expressions going through his face. "You are telling me the one weekend I am away, Armie suddenly shows up? Am I supposed to believe this was a coincidence?"  
"It was a coincidence. I knew he was coming, he had texted me but I never had planned to actually see him."  
Jason nodded, his eyes showing he clearly didn't buy it. "Is this it? Is this all that happened or is that more I should know?"  
Timothée bounced from foot to foot, his entire body shaking. "After dinner I...after dinner I went over to his hotel so we could talk about everything that happened between us"  
"You went to his hotel room?"  
"Yes, I wanted to talk to him and..."  
Jason laughed, a humorless and desperate laugh that echoed around the apartment and startled Timothée. He shook his head, fingers knotted on his hair as he cursed under his breath, eyes already teary.  
"Please, please tell me you....", he couldn't go on, the pain shooting through his body was too much for him to handle. "Please, tell me you didn't spend your entire weekend fucking him, while I was gushing about my talented, Oscar nominee boyfriend to my entire family."  
Timothée remained quiet as he shrugged his shoulders, the tears clouding his vision as he tried his best to find something to say. The look on Jason's eyes was almost too much to bear, he was broken.  
"Oh my God, you did spend the weekend with him. You spend the last three days fucking him and now you don't even have the guts to look me in the eyes and tell me? Are you fucking serious?"  
"I didn't plan any of this, okay? I never meant to hurt you, but I couldn't keep lying to myself anymore. I'm sorry"  
"You're sorry? You're fucking sorry? You went after me, you asked me for a second chance, which I wasn't sure I should give you, only to cheat on me one week later and all you've got is sorry? Seriously?"  
"What do you want me to say?"  
Jason shook his head, tears running down his cheeks. "I'm so so stupid"  
"Jason, this is not your fault"  
"In some ways it is. Since L.A. I knew I had absolutely no chance and yet I stayed. I trusted in you, I believed in the things you said....I did exactly what you do with him"  
Timothée shook his head. "Things are different now"  
"And you believed him?"  
"He loves me and he is getting a divorce. I would be a fool to waste a chance to be with him for real"  
Jason nodded. "Armie gets a divorce, you run over to him. Just like I said you would"  
"Jason...." whispered Timothée, trying to reach for Jason, who stepped back.  
"Don't touch me"  
"I really like you, Jason and I wish I could love you the way you deserve"  
Jason chuckled. "Nice way of showing, Tim"  
"Would you rather me lie to you? I'm trying to be honest with you"  
"Why you talking about honesty? You already cheated on me! Your honesty means nothing to me!"  
"I'm sorry, Jason, that's all I can say. I'm sorry"  
"So am I"  
Jason grabbed his bag, swung his backpack over his shoulder and made his way to the door. He reached for the doorknob, his hands trembling slightly as he looked at Timothée over his shoulder.  
"I hope you're happy with him and I hope he means everything he told you this weekend. Because if he didn't and you're hurt in the end, I'm not sure I'll be there to help you mend the pieces."

****

The white narrow hallway was quiet. Sitting on the floor, with his back against the wall and his legs spread out, Armie had his head down and his eyes closed. It wasn't even five in the afternoon and between the long flight, the fight with Elizabeth and his long meeting with his lawyer, he was left feeling a kind of stress he had not felt in a long time.  
He let out a heavy sigh, his body craving for a bed -or couch, at that point he wasn't going to be picky- where he could throw himself and get some much needed sleep. He needed that, his body needed that.  
At the sound of the elevator doors opening, Armie looked up, a sigh of relief as he saw Nick. He got up, stretching out his legs and arms as he did so. He could easily see the look of confusion on Nick's eyes and gave his friend a small smile.  
Nick stared at Armie for a couple of seconds, he had a small smile on his face but it was clear to him he wasn't on his best mood. He looked around, finally getting a glimpse of the bags on the floor and arched an eyebrow.  
"What happened?"  
"I've been officially kicked out of my own house"  
"Shit, I'm sorry"  
"It was kind of expected. But I don't really have a place to go right now, so I was thinking that maybe I could stay here until I get everything fixed? It's just a few days, Nick, I promise I won't bother you"  
Nick rolled his eyes as he made his way past Armie. "You don't need to beg, Armie. I'm your best friend, you really think I'd let you out on the streets?"  
"Thank you, man"  
Armie grabbed his bags and followed Nick inside the small apartment. He threw his bags on the floor and sat down on the couch, head thrown back and eyes closed. He remained quiet for a couple of seconds, taking a few deep breaths as he tried to relax his body.  
"I was going to ask about New York, but I can see you are very tired. Why don't you take a nap and you tell me everything that happened over dinner?"  
Armie nodded, a small smile on his lips. "Thanks man, I appreciate"  
"And I mean it, I wanna know everything", said Nick as he patted Armie's shoulder and walked over to the kitchen.  
"Even the dirty bits?"  
Armie could hear Nick groaning in the distance and laughed. "Okay, maybe not everything"  
Armie let out a sigh, lying down on the couch as he closed his eyes once again. He could feel his body relax and sleep slowly taking him over just as his phone started ringing. He reached for it on his pocket and answered it right away, not even bothering to see who it was.  
"Hello?"  
"Hey there, how are you doing?"  
Armie shifted around on the couch, getting in a more comfortable position just as Timothee's voice filled his ear.  
"Sweet Tea, hearing you voice is the highlight of my day. You have no idea how much I miss you already"  
"Oh I think I do. Waking up without you today was so sad and then I had to talk to Jason...I hated it"  
"It didn't go very well with Elizabeth either, she kicked me out of the house"  
"Where are you", asked Timothée and Armie could tell by his voice he was concerned.  
"I am staying at Nick for a couple of days"  
"And the kids? Are they okay?"  
"Haven't see them yet, but I will be there tomorrow. I miss them and she can't keep me away from them"  
Timothée remained in silence for a couple of seconds and Armie suddenly got tense. He didn't know why, but it had been such a hard day already, for a moment he thought Timothée was about to say he changed his mind.  
"Timmy, what's wrong?"  
"I'm just thinking. Why do people have to suffer for us to be happy?"  
Armie sighed, shaking his head even though Timothée couldn't see. "Hey, don't do this. I know it sucks how some people we care about have to get out of this hurt, but we deserve to be happy, Timmy"  
"I know we do and I'm sorry for even talking about this"  
"It's okay, babe, don't worry"  
He smiled as he heard the soft giggle of Timothée on the other side of the line. "Babe....I like the sound of that"  
"Good, cause I plan on using a lot"  
"I look forward to it. Now I think you should go get some sleep"  
"What? No, I wanna talk to you"  
"Armie, I can hear in your voice you are dead tired, go get some sleep"  
"No, I'm not hanging up on you"  
"Armie, you are tired and you need some sleep. Take a nap, grab something to eat and then you can call me"  
"Are you sure?"  
Timothée chuckled. "Yes, I'm sure. Now go"  
"Okay. Love you, Sweet Tea"  
"I'll never get tired of hearing you say this"  
Armie smiled. "Love you", he said again in a whisper.  
"Love you too"


	17. Better Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie spends some time with his kids, but he is still struggling with the decisions and mistakes from his past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter tittle comes from Pearl Jam´s song and well...the fic itself. Hope you enjoy it.

It was a warm and sunny day in California, the smell of fresh cut grass was strong and the high pitched sound of the kids screaming and laughing took over the entire house.  
Harper and Ford were running around the backyard, their giggles getting louder as Armie ran closer, making funny noises and screaming their names in pure joy. Once he reached close enough, he wrapped his arms around them, catching each one of them in one arm.  
Harper screamed and tried to get away from his grip, but of course her actions were futile. Armie laughed, buring his nose on her neck and rubbing it fast, which made her squirm and giggle. He turned to Ford right after it, playfully biting on the one year old´s tummy.  
Armie knew these moments of pure bliss and playfulness with the kids would cool down from that moment on. They wouldn't be living at the same house anymore and once the divorce was settled, even with the shared custody, he knew seeing them would involve a lot of conversation with Elizabeth and judging by how mad at him she was right now, things could get ugly.  
He knew this new dynamic wouldn´t be easy, but that new dynamic also included Timothée and that made it all better. With a content sigh, Armie threw himself on the ground, lying down on the grass with both kids on top of him. He chuckled as they both climbed him, pulled on his hair, poked his cheeks and chest. They did to him whatever they wanted and he couldn´t be happier.  
A thought crossed Armie´s mind and he quickly reached for his phone, unlocking it and searching through his contact list until he found the right name. He waited for a few seconds until Timothée´s smiley face appeared on the screen and sat up, pulling the kids to his lap as he adjusted the phone so everyone was on the screen.  
“Timmy!” Harper scream was full of joy, the little girl clearly missed Timothée and the feeling was mutual.  
“Hey Hops, hey Ford”  
Armie smiled as Ford leaned closer to the screen,puckered his lips and sent the brunette a kiss. He kissed the boy´s head before turning his attention back to Timothée, who had a grin on his face.  
“This is a nice surprise”, said Timothée as Armie nodded.  
“I thought that talking to you would be the only thing able to make this moment better than it already was”  
Timothée´s smile was eating his face and he could tell he was blushing a dark crimson. Armie could have devoted his entire time to his kids, but he wanted to share that precious moment with him and that felt good, great actually. It gave Timothée even more certainty that he had made the right choice by giving his relationship with Armie another chance.  
“Timmy, when you are coming here? I miss you”  
“I miss you too, Hops and I promise you I will try my best to visit the three of you very soon, okay?”  
“And we will have a tea party”  
“Of course we will. We can have pajama parties too and anything else you and Ford want”  
The little girl smiled wide, her eyes wandering to her father as if to guarantee she had heard Timothée right.  
“See, I told you Uncle Timmy would come to visit. You just have to be little bit more patient”  
Harper and Ford kept on talking -or in Ford´s case trying- to Timothée for a few more minutes, but as it usually happens with kids, their attention drifted quickly and soon enough they were back to running around on the grass.  
“I miss you so much already”, said Armie after taking a quick look around him.  
“Don´t you even dare talk about this, cause all I´ve done is think about you and how much I´d like to go back to last weekend”  
“Just us, locked inside the hotel room, doing nothing and yet everything. I could easily get used to that, Timmy”  
“You wanna get domestic with me, Hammer?”  
“I wanna be everything with you, Timmy”  
“I like to hear that”  
“And I like to say”, said Armie with a grin as Timothée smirked. “I´d love to talk more with you and you know that, but I promised the kids I´d grill something for them”  
“Of course, go be the awesome dad that you are. I will call you later, when I´m in bed, feeling lonely and sad”  
Armie bit hard on his lip, shaking his head as Timothée chuckled. “Quit teasing me, Chalamet”  
“And what would be the fun in that?”  
“You little shit”, he said with a laugh as Timothée shrugged his shoulders. “I gotta go, but I will be eagerly waiting for your call”  
Timothée nodded. “Love you”  
“Love you too”, Armie said almost in a whisper before ending the call. He called out the kids, making sure they were at eyesight and walked back into the house by the kitchen door.  
Elizabeth stood by the counter where she had a privileged view of the garden, but luckily for Armie couldn´t really hear much. Their eyes met briefly as he made his way to the fridge, figuring out exactly what he would cook for his kids.  
“I heard Harper call out Timothée´s name, were you talking to him?”  
Armie nodded his head, his body still turned towards the fridge. “Yes I was, the kids missed him and I know he misses them too, so I thought it would be nice for them to see each other”  
“And since when you and Timothée are on speaking terms again?”  
With a sigh, Armie closed the fridge and walked over to Elizabeth. He leaned on the counter beside her, his eyes focused on the kids as they played outside.  
“We met while I was in New York and we managed to talk and solve everything”  
She nodded. “So with Timothée you can actually have a conversation and solve everything, but with me you jump straight to divorce?”  
“Elizabeth, please, we´ve been through this before. What is the point in being in a loveless marriage? I don´t wanna hurt you any more than I already did and this divorce is the only way I can guarantee we will both have a chance of being happy again”  
“I was happy”, she said as she turned to look to him.  
Armie turned to her, shaking his head. “No, you were not. Our marriage was a mess, Elizabeth, we barely talked, we barely did anything together and we both know that the chemistry and attraction we once had is gone”  
“Are you with someone else?”  
“Elizabeth…”  
“Are you with someone else, Armie?” Her eyes found his as she waited for an answer. An answer she was almost sure she didn´t want to hear, but that she still felt like she needed.  
Armie knew it wasn´t the time nor the place for her to know the entire truth, but if she really wanted to know -and he could see in her eyes that she did-, than he owned her that much.  
“Yes, there´s someone else, but that´s all I´m saying for now”  
“Well, I´m not surprised. I hope you know what you are doing though, I hope this isn´t some random woman who knows nothing about you and is just after your money and status”  
“That´s not what´s going on”  
“I hope so, I´d hate to see you throw away your kid´s future because you are suddenly some bimbo´s sugar daddy”. As Armie kept his eyes on her, Elizabeth gave him a small smile. “I´ll be upstairs, call me if you need any help with the kids”

*****

The waitress placed their plates down and left without uttering a word, her eyes barely made contact with them and truth be told, to Armie this kind of indifference felt good sometimes. The fact not everyone in this town was obsessed with celebrities was a relief and allowed him to have some moments of peace.  
“So the day with the kids turned out better than you expected?”  
“Definitely. Elizabeth gave us some space and I could actually have some fun with them. Maybe the divorce process won't be as difficult as I thought it would be”  
Nick put his burger down, cleaning his mouth and fingers with the napkin. “Armie, I love Liz and we´ve become really good friends throughout the years and as much as I´d like to agree with you, I don´t think that´s the case”  
“What are you talking about?”  
“I´m trying to tell you not to fool yourself because of one day. She threw you out of the house just yesterday, she still mad at you and even if she wasn´t, divorces are never easy.”  
“I know it´s not easy, but at least when it comes to the kids, I like to think she will be reasonable. We don´t have to make them go through any more pain than they already will”  
“I agree with you, but it´s easier said than done. All I want is for you to be prepared for whatever might come your way...specially when she finds out exactly why you left her”  
“She already knows”, he said as Nick looked at him with wide eyes. “Not everything of course, she knows that I don´t love her, she knows there´s someone else involved, but she doesn´t know it´s Timmy”  
Nick nodded, taking another bite of his burger. “About that, will you guys share the news or keep things private?”  
“We talked and decided to keep things private for now. Not only because of the divorce, but because we deserve some time for ourselves, you know? We never fully experienced a relationship and now that we can do it, we want to make it right. Just go slow, you know?”  
“Of course, cause spend an entire weekend stuck on a hotel room, fucking like two teenagers is taking things slow”  
Armie laughed, shaking his head as his friend shrugged his shoulders. “We missed each other and for your consideration we had deep and meaningful conversations, okay?”  
“I´m just messing with you, man. I don´t really care what you guys consider taking it slow and I don´t care if tomorrow you decide to let the whole world know. I´m just glad you solved your problems and are trying to make things right”  
Armie smiled. If it wasn´t for Nick´s friendship and guidance the last couple of weeks, he would probably have drowned in his sorrow, frustrations and booze. It felt nice to finally have someone he could openly talk to.  
“I have another question and I don´t you to take it the wrong way, but what about your living situation?”  
“I have been thinking about that a lot, I don´t want to annoy you with my presence there, you are already helping me way too much, you shouldn´t have to put up with me at your place either. I just need some time to find myself a new place, somewhere nice and kid friendly”  
“Armie,you can take your time, okay? I will help you look for some place nice and with enough space for the kids and you can stay with me for as long as you want. I can´t provide you much privacy, though”  
Armie shrugged, taking a sip of his coke. “I have a roof over my head, this is enough for me, Nick”

*****

The apartment was quiet and mostly dark, the only light was the one the moon provided as it shined through the open curtains. Inside the bathroom, Timothée dried himself off before heading over to his bed.  
His weekend with Armie had been perfect, but because of it, all the new scripts he had intended to look through during those two days had been piling up on his nightstand. Earlier that day, he had opened one of the scripts and started reading some pages, but FaceTime with Armie and the kids had left him a giggling mess and he could barely concentrate in anything after that.  
As he lied down on the bed, Timothée reached for his phone and called Armie, a wide smile on his lips as the man answered after just ringing twice.  
“Good night, I thought you weren´t calling me anymore”  
“And why wouldn´t I?”  
“I don´t know, maybe you are tired of me already. Your last boyfriend was young and around you all the time, maybe you reconsidered wasting your time with an old guy like me”  
He was obviously joking, but deep inside Timothée feared that Armie did in fact think something along this lines, that in a few weeks he would get tired of this life and go back to Jason.  
“I left the young boyfriend because I wanted to be with you, old man. And if it matters so much to you, I´d do the exact same over and over again”  
Timothée heard Armie´s chuckle and he could already picture him. Lying down, his blue eyes stuck on the ceiling and a goofy smile on his lips.  
They were in silence for a few seconds, both men listening to each other´s breathing. It was odd, but in a way it made them feel like they were in the same bed, in each other´s arms, savouring the sight and feel of one another.  
“I´m afraid I won´t be able to go to New York in the next couple of days. We´ll have to wait until the rehearsals start”  
“Two weeks then, right?” Timothée heard Armie mumble a soft yes and sighed, biting on his lip as his eyes wandered around the dark apartment. “I think I can deal with it, it won´t be nice though”  
“Maybe you could come here?”  
“I´d love to, Armie, but I´m not sure its´a good idea”  
“Why not?”  
“We´re trying to keep our relationship to ourselves for now, you know in Los Angeles will be almost impossible to get rid of the paparazzi and there´s Liz too. I don´t think being around her right now is a good idea”  
Armie remained quiet for a while and Timothée feared he hadn´t take this very well. “I guess you are right, besides we can handle two weeks, right?”  
“We spent three months away from one another, we can manage two weeks, we just need patience”. He could hear Armie chuckle and smiled, patience wasn´t exactly Armie´s strongest suit. “Are you still at Nick´s place?”  
“Yes, I´ll be staying here until I can find myself a nice house. I know I could always go to a hotel, but I plan on having the kids with me as much as I can and it´s not fair to keep them locked up in a hotel room. They´ve gone through a lot already because of my job, changing schools twice or even three times a year, I´m trying to make sure this whole process goes by as smooth as possible for them”  
“Such a great dad”  
“I am trying. Trying to be a better dad, a better actor, a better boyfriend and a much better man than I have ever been”  
Timothée rolled his eyes and sat up straight. “Armie, I´m gonna tell you something and I need you to pay attention to it, okay?”  
“O-okay”  
“You are a good man, Armie, you have always been a good man. Have you made mistakes? You, you have. Have you hurt people around you? Yes, you have. Have you been selfish at some moments of your life? Yes, you have, but who hasn´t? I just hurt someone who truly loved me and wanted to give me the world, but I had to do it, because other way I would never be happy. You´ve made your mistakes, you are aware of them and you did it mainly because you were scared of yourself, scared of who you truly were.  
Things are different now, you realized you don´t need to hide yourself, you realized it´s okay to love whoever you want to love. Those mistakes do not define you, what defines you is your love for your children and your career, how much you care about others, how you try to help people as much as you can. You are a great man, Armie and you should never doubt that”  
“I truly don´t deserve you”  
“Once again, let me be the one to decide that”  
“I meant it, Timmy, I don´t deserve you”  
“Armie, you might not agree with me, but you deserve love and I am willing to give you that love. I am willing to give you everything you need to be happy and to feel like you belong”  
He could hear Armie sigh on the other side of the line. “Thank you, I know I can be a pain in the ass sometimes, so thank you for your patience”  
“Stop putting yourself down, babe, you are way more than you can see. Your fans, your kids and I love you very much and that should be enough for you to realize you matter”  
“How did I get through most of my life without you?”  
Timothée chuckled. “I´d like to know that too”


	18. Nobody Said It Was Easy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The boys have a very pleasuring morning, but as the day goes by they realize things are never gonna be as easy as they would like.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Relax, grab a drink and take a seat, this chapter starts off just the way we like it, full of smut, but can´t promise the end will be as pleasant.

Timothée closed the door behind him, sweat dripping from his forehead, his clothes clinging into his body. He had his earphones on, Kid Cudi's songs filling his ears as he walked straight to the fridge, grabbing a bottle of water and chugging down on it.

The music stops just as the phone starts vibrating on his pocket and he quickly reaches for it, smiling as he sees Armie's name lightening up the screen. 

"Good morning"

Timothée can't help but smile wide, the earphones make it seem like Armie was right there with him, whispering on his ear and there was nothing he wanted more in the world than for that to be true.

"Good morning, isn't it a little early for you to be up, Mr. Hammer?"

Armie chuckled. "I told you I'm having a hard time sleeping the past week. I don't know if it's the couch or the fact I am not on my own house, but I keep waking up during the night and can't really get any sleep past 6am"

"I told you to find yourself another place"

"And I am trying, Nick is helping me out. Now tell me, why are you kind of breathless, what were you doing, Mr. Chalamet?"

"I went out for a run"

"You hate running, Timmy, I always had to drag you out of bed whenever I wanted you to come with me"

"And I still hate it, but I've got all this sexual tension building up inside of me and I had to do something about it"

"Oh really?" The teasing in Armie's voice was clear and Timothée bit his lip, holding back a little moan he so desperately wanted to let out. 

"I had a dream with you last night and when I woke up, I was sweating and hard, and since jerking off wasn't enough, I had to go out and run a little bit"

Timothée smiled at himself as Armie remained silent for a few seconds. He knew him well enough to know he was thinking of all the possible scenarios for this dream.

When he did speak again, Armie's voice was deeper and lower than usual, a voice he usually used while they were in bed.

"You dreamt of me? How was this dream, Timmy?"

"You really wanna know?"

"Yes, I do"

"You were sitting on my bed, naked and your legs spread wide. Your lips were swollen and red from all the biting you were doing, you had that nice dildo of yours, the one we used to play with, stuck deep inside you while you stroked yourself. It was so vivid and beautiful"

Armie let out a low moan, his breathing slightly more laboured now. "Fuck Timmy, that's hot"

"Oh that's not all. I was there, sitting on the edge of the bed while I watched you. My words of encouragement were pushing you to the edge, you were shaking and moaning my name, our eyes locked and when you came....fuck Armie, you came so much I was almost jealous of you"

Timothée closed his eyes, his hand tugging on his hardening cock as he heard Armie hiss on the other side of the line. Oh how he wished they were together.

"Shit Timmy, you gotta stop"

"You asked me to tell you", he said in a low voice, teasing Armie even more than he had already. "Besides, I'm all worked up now and I could really use your help"

"I'd love to help you, babe, but I can't"

"Why not", asked Timothée almost in a purr, his right hand inside his sweatpants.

"Nick can wake up at any minute, I can't do this on his leaving room"

"Go to the bathroom then", he said quickly, his hand slowly stroking his shaft. "God Armie, I really need you"

"Fuck babe, I wish I was there. I'd have you in my mouth and suck all that tension out of you"

Timothée groaned, his back arching slightly as he imagined Armie's warm mouth wrapping around him. "Go on..."

"I'd lick you all over, from your pink little hole to your nipples. I'd tie you up to the bed, bite down hard on your shoulder blades, make you scream my name and beg for my cock..."

A moan escaped Timothée as he increased his pace, his teeth biting so hard on his lip he could taste the blood. "Oh Armie, I'm almost there"

"Fuck Timmy, I love to hear you moan like this. I love to know you are stroking yourself and getting all worked up just to the sound of my voice..."

"Ahhh, so damn close"

"Oh babe, next time we see each other I will make sure you get your wish, okay? I will bring our little toy, I will sit down on that bed and perform for you until you cum all over yourself"

Timothée hissed, his body shuddering and his cock twitching on his hand as his cum erupted from him. He could hear Armie moaning too, his breathing getting heavier and then a low grunt. He had come too.

"Shit Armie, you gotta keep that promise" 

"I will, babe, I will"

*****

The weather was extremely hot in New York, there were no clouds in the sky and because of it the streets of Brooklyn were crowded with kids, ice cream trucks and hipsters.

Timothée walked around the streets doing his best to go by unnoticed, his head already filled with too much for him to have to worry about people rushing over to him. He stepped inside the museum a little bit unsure of what he was doing, maybe it would be better to stay away and just move on without trying to fix anything.

But deep inside he knew he couldn't really do this. He had to have a serious and calm conversation with Jason if he wanted to find peace of mind. When he reached the office door and knocked on it, Timothée could feel his heart pounding on his chest. He hated confrontation.

"What are you doing here", asked Jason as soon as he opened the door.

"Hi, I came to talk to you"

"You want to talk to me? Last week you couldn't find the guts to pick up a phone and tell me you thought it was better to end things and now you feel like talking? Are things going bad with Armie? Is he not getting a divorce anymore? Do you need stupid me to make you feel better?"

Timothée bit his lip. He knew he deserved that, he knew he had screwed up and that Jason had all the right to be mad at him. But since he met Jason, Timothée felt like he had found a true friend, someone he could talk about everything and he didn't want to lose that.

"I know I deserve this, Jason, but could you please give me a chance to talk to you?"

"And why would I do that?"

"So I can explain everything. I know I was shitty with you and you deserve to be angry, but please, let me talk to you and set everything straight."

"You cheated on me with Armie, there's no need to explain anything else"

Timothée sighed. "Yes there is, I was with you and I should have thought about the pain I was putting you through instead of just thinking about myself"

Jason sighed. "But you didn't and now it's too late. I seriously don't understand what you are doing here, do you think a little conversation a week later is gonna do me any good? I love you Timothée and for the last four months I was there for you, but then Armie shows up, you fall to your knees and everyone else be damned"

Timothée took a deep breath, his eyes filling with tears as he tried to keep himself together. He knew being with Armie was the right thing, because that's what he wanted, that's what made him happy. But that didn't mean he wasn't hurt by what he had done to Jason.

"All I ask is for five minutes, Jason. I could barely say anything the last time we saw each other, so please, give me a chance to do it now. I'm not asking you to forgive me, I'm not... I don't expect for us to be friends after all of this, but if I can ask you for one last thing, is that you let me explain everything"

Jason cleared his throat, the tears swelling up on his eyes and his heart pounding on his chest. "Fine, let's go to the coffee shop, we can talk there"

"Thank you"

*****

The coffee shop was practically empty, it was a beautiful day outside and the last thing people seemed to want is to be inside a museum, which for them was perfect. This was not the type of conversation neither one of them wanted to be having in a crowded place.

Jason sighed, licking his lips as he stared at Timothée, who kept his head down, his finger tracing the hem of his glass. "Are you gonna say something or we're gonna sit here the entire afternoon doing absolutely nothing?"

Timothée took a deep breath and drank the rest of his iced coffee, before turning his attention to Jason. "I know I was a poor excuse of a man to you. You gave me love, comprehension, friendship and all I could do was hurt you. I know what I did was extremely wrong and I also know you might never forgive me and I fully understand that. I liked you from the moment I met you, Jason, I was attracted to you and if things had gone differently, if I had met you before Armie, I would probably be able to love you the way you deserve. What you do need to know is that you were never a rebound"

Jason shook his head. "Oh Timothée, c'mon"

"I'm being honest with you, Jason. It never crossed my mind to go out with you just so I could forget about Armie. Things happened so organically with us and I didn't anticipate any of it, but I loved it as long as it lasted"

"Did you really? Because I remember seeing you wake up in the middle of the night, sitting on the fire escape with that damn sweater on and I know you were thinking about him...God, you were wearing his clothes while with me and you didn't even care"

Timothée bit his lip, he felt a lump down his throat as he watched Jason's expression. He had never seen him that hurt, not even when they talked one week prior and he found out everything. This was him, pouring out everything he had been holding on for over four months.

"What, you thought I didn't realize that it was his sweater? You thought I didn't see you staring at his messages late at night or that you kept tabs on everything he did? You never tried to forget him, Tim, and I was just a game you were playing until he was yours again"

"That's not true", mumbled Timothée as he felt his tears begin to fall. "That's not true, okay? I wasn't the perfect boyfriend, I'll admit that, but I really wanted to make it work. You were everything anyone could ask in a partner and it killed me every time I couldn't stop thinking of Armie, because I knew you didn't deserve it"

"Then why didn't you talk to me? You always claimed to be honest, but you weren't. You were hiding everything and that destroyed me. Can't you see how easy things would have been if instead of insisting in our failed relationship, you had just told me that you couldn't do it anymore? Why didn't you tell me you were still too hung up on him and that you needed us to be apart so you could figure out exactly what you wanted, who you wanted? Why Timothée? Why backstabbing me turned out to be the easiest solution?"

"It wasn't easy"

Jason laughed through his tears. "Really? Cause if I remember correctly, you spent your entire weekend with him, locked in a hotel room while I was trying to talk to you. You had the chance to do something, to say something and you didn't. Even if you had called me from his phone to explain everything, it would be better than come back home and figure out you were fucking him"

"Jason..."

"Would it kill you to try and control yourself? To talk to him, but talk to me before anything happened? I know you love him, I have always knew and if you had come to me and told me you were breaking up with me because you wanted to try again with him, I would've understood"

"Would you?"

Jason closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths before he could look at Timothée again. "I would be mad and sad, but at least I wouldn't be disappointed"

"I am sorry, I am so sorry"

"Can I ask you one thing?" He watched as Timothée nodded his head and leaned closer, trying his best to not to sound too broken. "What exactly do you expect from this conversation?"

"That I...that you...", Timothée sighed, shaking his head as he tried to find the right words to say. "I hope that I don't lose you, that maybe one day we can still be friends?"

"You really think that's possible?"

He shrugged. "We can try"

"I think I've heard that before"

"Jason..."

"I don't know if I can do this, Tim"

Timothée nodded, drying out the last few tears on his face before he got up. He gave Jason a small smile and went to walk away, but stopped as he felt the brunette hold onto his hand. He looked down at him, arching an eyebrow and saw as Jason tried to put on a smile.

"Give me some time, maybe I actually can"

****

 

The kitchen was mainly quiet, the sound of the steak grilling in the stove and of Armie chopping some vegetables was all they could hear. The blond had been quiet for most of the afternoon and although Nick knew the reason why, he couldn't help but get slightly worried for his friend.

"Dude, why don't you go sit down and call Timmy. You look like you need something to cheer you up"

Armie shook his head. "I'm gonna help you here first"

Nick sighed, shaking his head. He took the knife away from Armie and pointed over to the living room. "You are way too depressed to do this, just go sit down a little bit and talk to your boyfriend, I'm sure it will help"

"Nick, I'm already staying here for free, I might as well help with something"

He rolled his eyes. "Armie, just go, please"

Armie sighed and nodded his head, heading over to the living room. He sat down on the couch, phone in hand and pressed Timothée's contact. He smiled as he heard Timothee's voice fill his ear, suddenly feeling a little bit better with himself.

"Hey, I was just about to call you"

"Oh, that's nice to hear" said Armie as he tried his best to sound cool. "How was your day, went out for another running session?"

Timothée chuckled, a jovial tone to his voice. "No I didn't, our little chat this morning was enough to get me through the day. I did go over to Brooklyn to talk to Jason, though"

"How did it go? Did you actually manage to talk to him?"

"I did and it was painful as hell, but I'd say it was promising. There's a very small chance of him staying around, being my friend. I hope you are okay with this, cause I really don't wanna lose his friendship"

"You'll have to deal with the fact Elizabeth will always be in my life, I can handle you being friends with your ex"

Timothée remained silent for a while and Armie knew he had noticed the sadness in his voice. "Armie, what happened? You sound...weird"

"I had a meeting with my lawyer, he wanted to discuss something that might be an issue on the divorce process"

"And what is it?"

"The fact it might not be that easy for me to get shared custody of the kids. Because of my job and the fact I am always traveling, a judge might not see a reason for me to have that...I mean, if won't be able to actually be there when they are with me, than what's the point?"

“Okay, so this is just a possibility he wanted to discuss with me, it doesn´t mean it will happen. Things are not so black and white, Armie and you, God you are such an amazing father and anyone can see that, I am sure everything will be fine in the end"

“I don´t know, Timmy. This hit me pretty hard, you know? They are everything to me and I don´t know if I will ever be able to handle not having them around me”

“Armie there´s nothing for you to worry about right now, okay? And I´m sure no matter how mad Elizabeth is she would never make it harder for you to be around them, cause that would be terrible not only for you, but specially for them. I know it must hard for you not to worry or even reconsider things, but please try not to think too much about this. 

“I know you´re right, but...I get scared too easily”

“You love your children and it´s completely normal that you get scared of losing them, but I know that won´t happen”

“Thank you...for everything you are doing and all you have done before. My life would suck without you”

Timothée remained silent for a second and when he spoke once again his voice was low, it almost seemed like he was scared or hesitant to say anything. "Can I ask you something?"

"Always"

"Have you talked to your family about the divorce?"

"No not yet, but my lawyers mentioned he talked to Elizabeth´s lawyer, so I am sure in between that she found time to talk to my mom and tell her how I've gone crazy"

Armie heard the doorbell ringing and looked over his shoulder. He was just about to get up when he saw Nick rushing over to it, before he could do anything.

"How do you think she will take it?"

"Badly of course, for her the only right thing I did in life was marry Elizabeth, I can´t even imagine how furious she will"

"Hey Armie", he heard Nick shout from the door. "You have visit"

Armie furrowed his eyebrows and got up from the couch, heading over to the door. His eyes went wide as he stopped behind Nick, staring at the blonde woman in front of him.

"Mom, what are you doing here?"


	19. Deep In Your Heart There Are Wounds Time Can´t Heal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dru is in Los Angeles and it´s time for Armie to face some demons.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, let´s make some things clear: This is fiction, I have no idea how the relationship between Armie and his mom truly is and this is my take based on my own perspective and well, my love for drama.  
> Also, yes I changed some of their schedule so it could fit the story better.

“Mom, what are you doing here?”  
Armie´s voice came almost in a whisper, his eyes locked on his mom as he heard the faint sound of Timothée´s voice. He felt like the world had stopped turning, like everything surrounding them had disappeared and he was left only with the sight of Dru, her blonde hair, her perfect makeup and manicured fingers and her eyes of judgment.  
It took everything in Armie to snap out of his thoughts and actually pay attention to what Timothée was saying on the other side of the line. He bit his lip, took a few deep breaths and shook his head, trying to get his thoughts back in order.  
“....is she really there?”  
“In flesh and blood”. His voice was shaky, his mouth was suddenly dry and his entire body had turned stiff, overwhelmed by the feeling of being face to face with his mom again after such a long time. “I´m...I´m gonna have to go now, okay?”  
“Of course, you go talk to her and we can finish this later. Please, try to stay calm and don´t take anything she says too seriously”  
“I will do my best”  
“I know you can do it. Love you”  
“Yeah, I lo…”, Armie cleared his throat, his mother´s eyes stuck on him.  
“It´s okay, Armie, just go”  
Armie sighed as he hung up the phone. He wanted to say it back, he wanted to shout to the world, but this was not the time. If his mother was there, was because Elizabeth had already told her about the divorce and she would now try to change the situation on her own ways, which normally involved trying to make him feel guilty or less of himself.  
Nick was still standing there, his eyes wandering from Armie to Dru. The tension in the room was palpable, a tension he had felt many times during all the years he had know the Hammer family. Things were never easy with Armie and Dru and he knew it would only get worse from now on.  
Aware that they needed time and space, Nick quickly reached for his keys and tried to put a smile on his face as he made his way past Armie and to the door. “I have a feeling you two have a lot to talk about, so I´m gonna go get some things on the market. Just make yourselves at home.”  
“Thank you, honey, we appreciate”. Dru smiled as she pulled Nick to a tight hug and kissed him, her lipstick leaving a mark on his cheek, just like she used to do when they were little.  
She waited for the door to close before she could make her way to the living room, placing her purse of the coffee table. Her eyes wandered around the small apartment and Armie knew she was taking in her son´s new surroundings. She loved Nick, but she didn´t care about his choices in life or the size of his apartment. He wasn´t a Hammer after all, but Armie was.  
“What are you doing here, mom?”  
“I came to talk to you, try to get some sense into that head of yours”. She turned around, her eyes locked on Armie as he kept on biting on his lip, clearly nervous. “Elizabeth told me about your latest crisis”  
“Crisis? Is that her word of yours?”  
“Mine and what else could I possibly call this, Armand?” Armie rolled his eyes, she knew how much he disliked being called Armand. He was Armie, he had always been Armie. “You´re giving up on the best thing that has ever happened to you”  
“My children are the best thing that has ever happened to me”  
“And Elizabeth is the reason why you have them in the first place”  
“And I´ll always love her for it, I will always care about her and help her whenever she needs. But no matter what you say, there is no way I am gonna stay married to her”  
“A marriage is a sacred thing, Armand”  
Armie laughed, shaking his head as he took a few steps closer to his mother. “That´s funny coming from you, mom. Tell me more about your own divorce”  
“By now you and your brother know that I never wanted that divorce, your dad was the one who decided on that, Armand. He, just like you are cowardly doing to Elizabeth, gave me no choice”  
“And from what I can see both of you look way happier than you were back then, mom. All those fights, all the cheating and the constant abuse you both submitted each other, would you rather still be stuck with him? Having to put up with all that shit? Don´t get me wrong, I think marriage is a very important thing, but so is my sanity and my happiness”  
Dru closed the gap between them, her hands cradling Armie´s face as she tried to put on a smile. “You are making a mistake, Armand. You belong with Elizabeth and there is where you´ll find your happiness”  
“Mom…”  
“Armand, I am your mother, I know what´s best for you”  
Armie sighed, taking a hold of her wrists and pushing her away from him. “And what´s best for me, mom? Give up acting, let go of some of my friends because they don´t fit your standards? Stay in a loveless marriage for appearances?”  
“You are not thinking rationally, son”  
“I am, actually it might be the first time in my entire life I am being completely rational and true to myself. I am doing what I want instead of doing what everyone else expects of me, what you always expected of me”  
“So this is suddenly my fault? I am the reason you are wasting your life?”  
“You don´t even listen, do you? I just told you I am finally being myself and you think I am wasting my life?”  
“That´s the way I see it, Armand”  
“Armie. My name is Armie”  
She rolled her eyes. “Your name is Armand and you need to stop acting so careless and childish. You have two kids, you have a loving wife, what else could you possibly want?”  
“To be myself?” He wished he could shout at her, that he could show her just how angry he was at the fact that even after all this time she couldn´t care less.  
“Okay and who are you”, she asked, annoyance clear in her voice.  
“That´s the thing, mom, I don´t even know”. Armie had tears in his eyes by now, all those feelings he had suppressed his entire life were finally coming to the surface. “I spent years doing what you told me to do, acting the way you told me to act, being a little puppet in your hands and whenever I had an original thought, whenever I felt something that wasn´t written on your damn Bible, I felt like I was a failure. I grew up watching you taking Viktor´s side on everything because he was the son you always wanted to have, because he believed in the same things you did and he embraced the Hammer name in a way I never did. You tried to mold me into the perfect son and when you realized you couldn´t, you simply gave up on me and decided to judge and minimize everything I did.  
But then I became an adult, I found myself I woman I loved and cared about and I thought that was my moment, I thought with Elizabeth I could finally be myself, be the person I was meant to be. It didn´t take long for me to realize that I was wrong and I once again had someone trying to control me, mold me into something I wasn´t. And you know what the worst part is, mom? I allowed that to happen for so long that now I don´t know who I am, all I know is that this is not the life I want for me and now that I´ve decided to do something about it, no one can change my mind.”  
Dru remained quiet and serious. Despite all the things Armie had just said, nothing seemed to have changed within her and she still thought what he was doing was a huge mistake.  
“Be a man, Armand, and stop whining about your life when you had everything you could have possibly need”  
“I had material things, mom, but that´s not what I needed. I needed someone who I could talk to, someone who didn´t just put up with me.”  
Dru sighed, her manicured fingers pushing some of the hair out of her face. “Okay, you got mommy issues, look for a psychologist or something. There´s absolutely no need for you to throw away everything you and Elizabeth built in the last ten years because of this”  
Armie stared at her in disbelief. No matter what he said or did, she would never understand. “You don´t even try to understand me, do you? If things are not done the way you want, then it doesn´t matter, it´s not worth it”  
“Armand…”  
“Stop it, okay? I am done listening to you or trying to justify myself and the things I do. We will never understand each other and it will be better for everyone if we just accept it. I am getting a divorce, I am going to live my life the way I want to, with whoever I want to and I´m gonna be happy”  
“What about your kids, Armand? Are they gonna be happy with this? Are you even thinking about them?”  
He smirked. “I think about them every single day and I made sure to think this through before taking any action. They will suffer, I know they will, but I know that when they are old enough to understand how life works, they will see I did the right thing”  
“You are gonna regret this, Armand”  
“Maybe I will, but if I don´t do this, I will regret even more”  
Dru simply shook her head. She grabbed her purse and walked over to the door, her heels the only sound echoing in the apartment. “If you ever feel like having a proper conversation, I am staying with Elizabeth”  
“A proper conversation means accepting you are right and I am wrong? Because if that´s the case, mom, you can go back to Texas”  
She shot Armie a piercing look before making her way out of the apartment. As soon as the door closed behind her, Armie slid down to the floor, his back against the couch as he let out a breath he didn´t even know he was holding.  
The air was suddenly lighter and he could feel a weight being lift off of his shoulder. This was a conversation he had postponed for way too long and it felt nice to finally be able to say what he had always wanted to say to his mother.

******

Nick made it back home shortly after 10pm. He arched an eyebrow as he closed the door behind him and took in the dark apartment. Looking around, he caught a glimpse of Armie´s feet dangling from the couch and made his way over, furrowing his brows as he noticed his friend already asleep on the couch.  
He looked like he had simply thrown himself there and end up falling asleep with his jeans and shirt still on, not to mention the look on his face. He looked concerned and sad and Nick knew right away that the conversation between Armie and Dru had turned out worse than he had expected.  
He made it to the kitchen, drinking some water as he looked around and noticed Armie had not eaten dinner. Now he was the one concerned, he knew way too well how bad Armie got after he and his mom had this kind of encounters. It was becoming clear to Nick that no matter what happened, Armie and Dru would never have a healthy relationship.  
Nick reached for his phone and stared at the screen for a while. He wasn´t sure if he should interfere, but he couldn´t see his friend that way and not get worried. He scrolled through his contact list, clicked on Timothée´s name and quickly typed a text, before grabbing himself something to eat.  
He talked to Dru.  
I don´t think things went well.  
Please, call him as soon as you can.

*******

The streets of Nick´s neighborhood were quiet, the sky was grey and filled with heavy clouds. Funny enough, it seemed to Armie that the weather had decided to match his mood. The conversation with his mother had been liberating, but still made him feel uneasy, which wasn´t exactly a surprise. Exercises had always seemed to help him get better, whether it was boxing, jumping rope or running, the burning of the muscles and the sweat took his mind off of the problems and helped him focus on what really mattered.  
Timothée, that´s what really mattered at that moment and that´s what he kept in mind as he ran down the streets, his shirt clinging into his body and his breathing heavy. Timothée and their relationship was worth of his thoughts and he held into that until he felt trouble breathing and his mouth went dry.  
He spotted a small grocery store and quickly made his way in, bought a bottle of water and walked out just as his phone started ringing. He hit the button on the earphones and as Timothée´s voice filled his ear, he smiled for the first time in almost 15 hours.  
“Good morning, babe”, he said, knowing well by now Timothée got all giggly when he called him babe.  
“Hey, what you doing? Can you talk?”  
“Yes, I was just running a little bit”  
“I got worried yesterday. You didn´t texted nor called and I started wondering if something bad happened”  
Armie made his way across the street to a small park and sat down on a bench, drying off his sweat. “Bad as in she managed to change my mind about the divorce? Do you really think she has that much power over me?”  
“Of course not, Armie, but I know nothing is easy with your mother. I try my best to understand her and see why she does things the way she does, but she is…”, Timothée sighed, trying desperately to find a good word that wouldn´t hurt Armie.  
“A witch? Evil?”  
Timothée couldn´t help but chuckle and Armie smiled. “Armie, she is your mother”  
“Yeah and I know better than anyone how bad she can be”  
“She´s not bad, she´s different than us”  
“That´s not being different, Timmy, that´s controlling and forcing her views and opinions on others. Look, she is my mom, she gave me life and in her own twisted way, I think she gave me love too, but for someone who talks so much about Jesus, she is very close to the Devil”  
There was a moment of silence coming from Timothée´s side and Armie smirked as he imagined the younger man leaning against the window, eyes wide and biting hard on his bottom lip as he tried to hold back a laugh. It was almost as if he could see him and that made Armie feel so much better.  
“You can laugh, I won´t be mad”  
“I´m not gonna laugh at you calling my future mother-in-law the Devil”  
“Suit yourself”, he mumbled before he heard Timothée break down.  
It took Timothée a moment to recover himself and Armie just sat there waiting, hearing as the brunette went from crazy laughing to giggles and then a soft little chuckle.  
“You have no idea how happy I am to hear your voice today. After yesterday night I really wanted to call and talk to you, but I was so drained I fell down on the couch and fell asleep. And then this morning I wanted to release some of the tension I had in me, the whole thing with my mom made me feel uneasy and when I´m feeling this way exercise is the only thing that help me”  
“You don´t have to explain yourself, Armie, I just got worried”  
“I know and I appreciate the fact someone cares”  
“Oh please, a lot of people care about you. Nick texted me last night saying he was worried and that I should try and talk to you”  
“He did?”  
“Yes he did, he really cares and you should know that better than anyone”  
Armie sighed, a small smile on his lips. “Oh I have some news”  
“Good news?”  
“Great news. I have booked my flight to New York already, I leave L.A. Saturday at 7am”  
“So you´ll be here on the afternoon? All to myself?”  
“Not necessarily. I mean yes, I will be all yours, but first I have a dinner with the cast of the play”  
“I can deal with that. Fuck, I can´t believe in four days you´ll be here and we´ll be together again”  
“At least until Mr. Busy has to to flight off to be a king”  
Timothée let out a laugh and Armie smile only seemed to grow. “We will have plenty of time, okay? I am not expected to be in the UK for almost a month”  
“Good, cause after these two weeks of hell, I plan on keeping you with me 24 hours”  
“Maybe if you would stay in my apartment other than your own that would happen”  
Armie chuckled. “I need my own place for when the kids come visit, but we would be fools to assume I won´t be spending most of my days on your apartment...more precisely, in your bed”  
“I like the sound of that”, said Timothée with a chuckle. “I gotta go now, but I want you to know I am very, very excited to know you´re coming and don´t you dare think I didn´t realize you completely changed the subject of this conversation. We will talk about you and your mom when you get here”  
“God, you don´t miss anything, do you?”  
“Not one single thing”  
Armie laughed, suddenly feeling much more relaxed and in peace with himself. “I´ll talk to you later, love you”  
“Love you too, tell Nick and the kids I said hi”  
“Will do”


	20. Pretty Girls Don´t Know The Things That I Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie has a lovely day with he kids before he heads over to New York, but Dru's presence still causes drama.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tittle comes from the song Magnets by Disclosure feat. Lorde, it´s a song about cheating and well... I felt like this line really fits something that happens in the end of the chapter. Hope you enjoy.

Timothee's giggles seemed to echo around the tiny apartment, giving Armie the illusion that he was right there with him, lying on the couch with his legs resting on his lap and not hours away, alone in New York in a rainy and cold night.

"You have any idea of how desperate I am for Saturday? I simply can't wait to get on a plane and go back to New York...to you"

Timothée bit his lip, his eyes were beaming and it was easy to see he was just as excited about this as Armie. "Oh believe me, I am just as desperate as you, Armie. I'm still having a hard time accepting the idea that you're not coming just for the weekend or for a quick fuck, you're coming to stay with me every day and every night"

Armie smiled wide, he was having a hard time controlling his emotions and it was exciting and at the same time weird. Being with Timothée was making him feel so carefree, so young, so happy. He had a hard time thinking about the last time he had felt this way.

"Every day and every night," he repeated. "I'll be all over you, Chalamet, so much that by the time the play is over you will be so tired of me, you won't even want to see my face"

"The day I don't wanna see that pretty face of yours is the day I go crazy"

Before Armie could say anything, Nick poked his head in between him and the phone and gave Timothée -who by now was already laughing- a smile. "If I were you I'd wait until you two are living together to say such things, Timmy. Believe me, this guy can be quite annoying when you have to handle him every single day"

"I will make sure he behaves, Nick"

"I don't think he understand the meaning of that word. Run for the hills, Timmy, do it while you still have time". He dragged the i and widened his eyes, which made Timothée laugh even harder.

Armie shook his head, pushing Nick away from him. "Ha ha ha, very funny"

Nick chuckled, patting Armie´s back as he motioned towards the kitchen. "Pizza is here"

Armie nodded, watching as Nick left for the kitchen before turning back to Timothée. "See what I have to put up with?"

"Oh, you love him"

Armie shrugged. "Have never been this close to Viktor, that's a fact. Anyway, we bought pizza, so I better go before he eats it all. I'm gonna be spending the day with the kids tomorrow and I still have to pack, so I might not be as available as I wish"

Timothée nodded. "It's okay, but don't forget to pack my present"

"What present?"

"The one you promised me you'd bring me?" Armie arched an eyebrow, a confused look on his eyes as Timothée sighed. "Our special dildo, Armie"

"You guys do know I can hear you, right," shouted Nick from the kitchen.

Armie's eyes went wide, his cheeks turning a bright red as Timothée laughed. "Sorry"

"You better go before we say anything else that might embarrass Nick"

Armie nodded. "I think you are right. I'll call you, okay?"

"I'll be waiting. Love you"

"Love you too". 

Armie sighed, getting up from the couch and making his way to the kitchen. He leaned against the counter, an apologetic smile on his face as he looked at Nick.

"I'm sorry you had to hear that"

"I'm gonna be honest with you, it was a bit too much information to me"

Armie nodded, patting Nick's back as he grabbed a slice of pizza. "I know, it won't happen again, sorry"

*****

Armie and Nick sat on a bench underneath a tree, a soft breeze hitting them as they watched as Harper and Ford played on the grass, the three year old dragging her brother around and the boy blindly following.

Armie had been with the kids for most of the day, and he had done everything he could to cherish every single second of their time together. He hadn't talked to Elizabeth about it yet, but he knew that judging by their current situation she wouldn't exactly be thrilled to travel around just so he could see his kids.

"Have you guys talked to them....or at least talked to Harper about what is going on?"

Armie looked over at Nick, shaking his head as he sighed. "We have barely talked to each other the last two weeks, let alone talk to the kids. I know we should, specially now that I'm going to New York and they're gonna stay here, she's a smart kid and she will notice something is wrong, but...how do I even start talking about this, Nick?"

"You've been through this"

"I was much older than she is, I could understand things, I could see how bad my parent's marriage was. But she's only three and although very smart, she can't quite understand the things we need to say"

Nick sighed. "Then do what you wished your parents had done to you and Viktor. Tell her you will love her and support her no matter what and that whenever she needs, you and Elizabeth will be there for her...and Ford. She might not understand why you're not home anymore, but I feel that as long as you make sure she knows you'll always be around, then everything is gonna be okay"

"Seriously, psychology classes, think about it"

He laughed, shaking his head. "Nah, you're my only patient"

Armie chuckled and watched as Harper run over to him, throwing herself in between his legs. He leaned down, kissing her forehead and pushed some of her blond hair out of her sweaty forehead, the bow in her hair nearly falling out.

"I want ice dream, daddy"

"Okay, then we're gonna go get you some ice cream" 

He picked Ford up on his arm and took Harper's hand in his as they walked over to a ice cream truck nearby. Nick followed suit, carrying the bag with their clothes and Ford's diapers. 

Armie placed Ford down when the ice creams were ready and kneeled down to hand him one while Harper devoured her with fierce enthusiasm. He laughed, watching both children get their faces and clothes all dirty as the ice cream melted in their hands. Maybe it wouldn't be easy to tell Harper about the divorce, maybe she would be crushed but Armie knew he was doing not only what was best for him, but also for his kids.

They deserved to grow up around healthy, stable and happy parents and this, his divorce and being with Timothée, was the only way he would ever achieve that.

*****

Armie parked the car inside the garage, Elizabeth's eyes stuck on him as she stood on the door, the car's headlights illuminating her face. He stared at her for a second and took a deep breath, taking a quick look at the kids through the rearview mirror. 

They were sleeping peacefully, tired after an entire day out in the park, running, laughing, rolling on the grass and simply enjoying themselves. Armie had taken them home and gave them a bath, knowing well enough the minute he started the car they would be out. 

He stepped out of the car and opened the door, unfastening Ford's belt just as Elizabeth made her way over. "You take him, I will take Hops"

Elizabeth nodded, picking Ford up in her arms as careful as she could and headed inside the house. Armie watched for a second before rushing to the other side so he could take Harper out.

He made his way inside the house feeling almost as an outsider. Armie knew all those hallways, he knew how all those doors worked and which window needed repair, but even so it didn't feel like his house anymore.

He placed Harper down on her bed, removed her bow and shoes and then pulled the blanket over her body. He placed a soft kiss on her forehead, pushing some of her hair back and smiled.

"She has so much of you, her personality reminds me of yours when you were her age. Sweet, funny and always eager to be the center of attention"

Dru's voice was low and her tone tender, but even then Armie could feel the judgment. No matter how she talked or what she said, she always found a way to attack him in someway or another.

To be honest, the last thing he wanted was to deal with her. He had a great day with his kids, Timothée was about to call around the next couple of minutes and he was starving. He just wanted to relax.

"Goodnight, mother"

"It's nice to see you again, Armand. Thought you would leave to New York without talking to me again"

"That was the plan, it just didn't work"

"You're still upset about the other day?"

"My daughter is sleeping right now and I need to go back home, so I'm not gonna get into this with you, okay?"

Armie gave Harper one last look and made his way past Dru. He heard her close the door behind her and stopped by the stairs, feeling her constant stare.

"What you want, mom?"

"Why don't you stay for dinner, Armand? I'm sure Elizabeth would love to have you around and I get to spend more time with you. I don't know when I'll be able to go to New York to see your play"

"Because you are always so busy, right?" 

Armie sighed, he knew her asking him to dinner meant she had something up her sleeve and although he knew accepting it was falling into a perfectly executed trap, he couldn't help but think about what Nick had said earlier. Maybe this was the best moment to talk to Elizabeth.

"I'll stay, but only because I need to talk to Elizabeth"

"And that´s fine by me, all I want is your company" She smiled at him and rested a hand on his back as they took down the stairs.

Elizabeth was on the dining room, putting one last plate on the table as they walked in. She looked up at them, a small smile on her lips and motioned Armie to his usual place on the head of the table.

He shook his head and sat down across from Elizabeth, leaving Dru with the remaining seat where he -much by Elizabeth's insistence- sat for the last couple of years. 

"Since I am here, I wanted to talk to you about the kids"

Elizabeth arched an eyebrow. "What exactly do you want to talk about?"

"How are we gonna tell them about the divorce?"

"Oh that's nonsense"

Armie closed his eyes, took a couple deep breaths and then looked over at his mother, trying to keep himself as calm as possible. "Why is this nonsense, mother?"

"They are too young to understand this, Armand. Besides, all you're gonna do is mess up with their heads when this is all over"

"When all this is ..." Armie stopped talking, his eyes going from his mother to Elizabeth, who watched them with a attentive eyes. "I knew this was a trap, but I thought you´d at least let me eat first"

"Armand please, it's time for you to stop this. The fun is over, you had your moment, now go get your things and come back to your home, to your wife and to your kids"

Armie shook his head, a look of complete disgust in his face as he stared at his mother. "What will it take for you to understand this is not a game? I'm not doing this because I am seeking attention, I am doing this because I deserve to be happy"

"This is where your happiness lies, Armand. In this home, with your two beautiful babies and with this woman, who devoted her life to you on the last ten years"

Armie felt the phone vibrate on his pocket and quickly reached for it, seeing Timothée's name on the screen. He saw from the corner of his eyes as Dru leaned closer and rolled her eyes as she saw it who it was.

"Just hang up that phone, that boy can wait"

"That boy has a name and it's Timothée"

"I don't care about his name. I care about you, Elizabeth and my grandchildren"

"Do you?!" He said, his voice going up a notch. "Do you really care about anyone besides yourself? You only still here because you can´t handle the idea I am not taking your orders. You don't give a damn about what I feel, about what I want, you just want to preserve the perfect family picture she created because you couldn't preserve yours"

"Do not talk to me like this, I am your mother"

"Then start acting like one, and for one second think about what I want, instead of thinking only about yourself" He watched her eyes go wide, her face hardening and shook his head. When he turned to Elizabeth, she was biting on her lip, her hands nervously tapping on the table. "You actually agreed with this? You thought this would make me come back? I thought you were better than this Elizabeth, I really did"

“Armie…”

As the phone kept on vibrating, Armie took it and was just about to hit answer when Dru grabbed his hand. "We are not done here, Armand. I don´t know what this boy can possibly want with you at this time of the day, but he can wait”

Armie smiled, leaning closer to his mother. "You are wrong again. We are done here and I am not gonna make him wait." He pushed the chair back and stood up quickly, answering the phone as he made his way to the garage.

"What is his problem? Why does he insist in this nonsense?”

Elizabeth bit her lip, shrugging her shoulders. “I don´t know, Dru”

“And that boy? Why can´t he simply let go of him once for all? It´s been two years, I don´t understand why he has to be around him all the time.”

Elizabeth looked down at her hands, suddenly a whirlwind of things taking hold of her entire being. Her head started to spin, she felt sick and her stomach was turning. She was wrong, she had to be wrong.


	21. You Make It Look Like It´s Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie is back to New York and this time not just for the weekend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tittle comes from The Weeknd´s song Earned It.

Timothée was impatient, his feet tapped the ground, his hands were sweating and his green eyes kept on wondering to the screens above his head, desperate to see any news about Armie´s flight. He knew he was coming, he had seen his text just before he entered the plane, but for some reason he still couldn´t comprehend, Timothée was anxious and scared.

Armie had done everything he said he would. He was going through the divorce no matter how scared he was of this new life he was about to head into, he had left his home and they were officially -even if not many people knew- together. Timothée was one hundred percent aware that this was actually happening, they were in a real relationship and yet, maybe because he was too desperate for all of this to work out, he was scared shitless.

When he finally saw the announcement of Armie´s flight arrival, Timothéee jumped up from his chair, shaky hands fixing the cap on his head as he awkwardly made his way closer to the gate. He had waited for Armie at the airport many times, this whole situation had happened countless times during the two years they were…, during the two years their affair lasted and he felt silly to be going through all of this anticipation now. But then Timothée reminded himself of one thing his mother had told him many times whenever he was with someone:  _ when you are truly in love with someone, all your rationality goes to waste, you can be 80 and yet, if you really love someone, the mere sight of them will make you feel like an adolescent experiencing his first love. _

This was exactly what Timothée was feeling at that moment.

The sight of Armie as he crossed the gate made Timothée´s heart beat faster and his knees buckle. He was wearing a black t-shirt with some patterns on it, fitting jeans that made his long legs look even longer, a three day stubble and his hair, golden and soft was a little disheveled, probably from sleeping through the flight. Timothée had never seen him look so beautiful.

He had to control himself as he watched Armie smile wide and make his way over. Timothée wanted to jump on him, hug him tight and kiss him senseless. The last two weeks without him had been like hell and now that they had at least a month together ahead of them, he wanted to cherish every single second of it.

“Hi,” said Armie with a little smirk on his lips. In his eyes it was easy to see just how happy he was to be there, right in front of Timothée once again.

“You have no idea how much I´ve missed you and how much I want to jump on you right now”

Armie chuckled. “I´m sure the paparazzis would love to see it”

Timothée shrugged. “I´m willing to give them a show if you are”

“I want the show to be private, if you don´t mind”

Timothée bit his lip. “I don´t mind it at all, actually look forward to it”

“Good to know. Should we go now, get that private show going before I head off to dinner?”

Timothée nodded and motioned Armie to follow him. They made their way through a less crowded area and headed to the airport´s parking lot. In the sea of cars, Timothée and Armie made their way through it side by side, hands touching briefly for time to time, eyes finding one another and smiles being shared. All they wanted was to be alone.

As soon as they made it to the car, Timothée jumped into the passenger seat and waited impatiently as Armie threw his bags on the trunk. The moment Armie climbed into the driver´s seat, Timothée grabbed a fistful of his shirt and pulled him close to him, their lips crashing together in a wet, rough and desperate kiss.

Timothée could feel his entire body catch on fire as he felt Armie´s hands on his waist, keeping his body close as their kiss grew more and more intense. They had been dreaming of this moment for days and now that it was finally here, they knew it would be almost impossible to let go. 

Timothée sucked on Armie´s bottom lip, smirking as he heard the soft and long moan escape his lips. He deepened the kiss, his hand boldly roaming down Armie´s chest and inside his jeans, rubbing Armie´s already hard cock.

Armie cradled Timothée´s face, his thumbs rubbing on the velvet skin of his cheeks as he pulled them apart. He was flushed, his breathing labored and his now swollen lips were begging to be reconnected with Timothée´s, but he knew he had to at least try to be the reasonable one and stop this from going any further. They were still in the middle of LaGuardia´s parking lot.

“Behave, Timmy, you know we can´t do this here”

“Says who?” Timothée had a mischievous smile on his lips and Armie knew he was doomed. There was no way he could resist the look on his boyfriend´s face, no way he could resist his skillful hand rubbing him slowly. 

They kissed once more and as the kiss intensified Timothée quickly unzipped Armie´s jeans and pulled his cock out, rubbing the throbbing shaft in quick motions. Armie´s moans of pleasure through the kiss, his large hands holding him close and the warmth of his body was driving him insane. He desperately wanted to jump onto Armie´s lap and take him inside of him right then and there, but since that seemed a bit too much even for them, Timothée would settle for the next best thing.

Armie closed his eyes and leaned his head back as he felt Timothée´s warm lips trace his neck and suck on his Adam´s apple. He knew they were at risk of being caught, but to be quite honest, at that point all Armie could think about was the way Timothée made him feel. He gasped as he felt his cock enter Timothée´s wet mouth and looked down at the brunette, his head bouncing up and down on his lap, his curls falling down his face and his lips stretched out around his member.

Armie groaned, electric waves running through his body as he grabbed a fistful of Timothée´s curls, forcing him down on his cock, loving to hear the low gagging sounds the brunette produced. He bit on his lip as he saw Timothée look at him from under his lashes, his eyes were watery, his cheeks were puffed and flushed and his lips now a bright shade of red. It was a magical sight.

Timothée could feel Armie´s cock throb and by the sound of his moans, he knew he was close. He pulled it out, taking long deep breaths and pumped the shaft a couple of times, his eyes never leaving Armie´s. “You´re close, aren´t you?”

Armie nodded. “So, so close”

Timothée smirked, his fingers brushing against the sensitive head a couple of times, before he took it back in his mouth, sucking hard on it until he felt Armie explode inside his mouth. He smiled to himself as he licked the shaft clean and sat back on his seat, wiping his lips with the back of his hand, while Armie watched him in awe.

Armie pulled him close, their chests pressed together and lips brushing slightly. He licked Timothée´s bottom lip, catching it in between his teeth for a second or two, loving the sound of the brunette´s moans. “You will be the death of me, Timothée”

He smirked. “Then I´ll make sure it will be a very pleasurable one”

 

*******

 

Armie left the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair still wet. He grabbed some clothes from his bag and quickly put it on, before making his way to the large mirror Timothée had close to the front door. He stared at himself for a couple of seconds, his lips were still a little swollen from their recent activities and he would be lying if he said his ass wasn't a little sore, but it had it all be worth it.

He ran his fingers through his hair, trying to look as presentable as possible and bit on his lip, not really sure he liked what he was seeing. Truth was Armie was still worried about the whole Broadway debut and he couldn´t help but think that he could easily ruin everything.

“So, what´s this dinner all about? You guys just gonna sit down and have some fun or is actually a work thing?”

Armie chuckled as he looked at Timothée over his shoulder. He was lying on the bed, sheets wrapped around his naked body and the script to Straight White Men on his hands as he flipped through the pages.

“Anna says she wants to discuss some last minute things before we start rehearsals”

“By last minute things you mean the fact you have to dance?”

Armie could sense the teasing tone in Timothée´s voice and shot him a dirty look. “Yes, Timothée, we´re gonna discuss the fact I will have to dance yet once again”

Timothée chuckled, placing the script down on the bed as he sat up. “Why didn´t you tell me about this?”

“Because I knew you would start teasing me, and right now what I need is to figure out exactly what to do”

“Moonwalk”

Armie arched an eyebrow, crossing his arms as he watched Timothée kneel down on the bed, sheets sliding down his legs and leaving him naked. “You have got to be kidding me, right? You actually think I can Moonwalk?”

Timothée rolled his eyes and got up, walking over to Armie with a little smile on his lips. “I´ve seen you dance and you are not as bad as you made it look on the film, Armie”

“Wow, I am feeling much better now”

“I´m serious, you could actually learn how to Moonwalk. I will help you”

Armie furrowed his eyebrows, hands resting on Timothée´s slim waist. “Do  _ you  _ know how to Moonwalk?”

“No, but thats´s why there´s youtube and tutorials.” He smiled over at Armie, wrapping his arms around his neck and pecking his lips quickly. “You go to dinner and when you come back we´ll have some nice wine and try to learn how to Moonwalk together, how does that sound?”

“I had other plans for us when I came back from dinner, but if you want to dance, then fine, we'll dance.”

“I´m sure it will be awesome”, said Timothée as he stood on his tiptoes and kissed Armie, this time a little longer.

Armie pulled him close, feeling his naked body press against him. He sighed as they pulled away, aware he didn´t have time for that, but also happy they would have an entire life ahead of them to be in each other´s arms.

“Go before you get late, I´ll be waiting for you”

Armie nodded. “I´ll be back as soon as possible, okay?”

“Okay”

“Love you”

Timothée smiled, he would never get over the sound of those two words leaving Armie´s lips. “Love you, too”

 

******

 

Armie shifted the weight of his body onto his right foot, slowing sliding his left foot backwards while lowering his right one. The video made it seem like it was easy, the foot smoothly sliding back, but the reality was Armie could barely do it without losing his balance enough to stumble forward, using all his strength not to fall face first on the floor.

Sitting on the bed, messy curls falling down his eyes was Timothée, biting hard on his lips as he tried not to laugh at the sight in front of him. Although he knew Armie wasn´t as bad as a dancer as he claimed to be -or as he had showcased in Call Me By Your Name-, Timothée was aware the idea of him doing a Moonwalk might had been a bit too much.

Armie groaned and he stumbled once again. He grabbed the computer in his hands, sticking his face on the screen and looking intensively at each movement the man on the video did. He squinted his eyes, bit on his bottom lip and nodded to himself, trying to memorize exactly everything he was seeing.

He tried once again, his left foot getting stuck on the floor and making him groan in frustration. He heard the soft giggles coming from the side and looked over at Timothée, his hands resting on his hips as he watched his boyfriend try to control himself.

“I´m sorry, I shouldn´t be laughing,” said Timothée in between chuckles.

“This was all your idea, you should be doing this with me”

“I´m here for moral encouragement”

Armie arched an eyebrow. “Laughing at me is moral encouragement?”

Timothée nodded, letting a serious look take him over. “Every time I laugh you feel more and more encouraged to try again and get it right. Let´s say it´s reverse psychology”

“Because you´re a master in the subject, right?” Timothée nodded, a cute little smile on his face that Armie simply couldn´t resist. He walked over, pushed Timothée down on the bed and climbed on top of him, his large hands pinning Timothée´s above his head. Armie let his nose brush against the soft skin of his neck, grinding their groins together as Timothée smiled and closed his eyes.

“You should be practicing, Mr. Hammer”

“The Moonwalk can wait”, Armie mumbled, his lips placing kisses on Timothée´s entire face. Their lips met in a slow and sweet kiss, tongues exploring one another´s mouths. Armie slid one hand down Timothée´s body and down his pants, grabbing him through his shorts and rubbing it softly, smirking as he heard the barely audible moans escaping him.

“Okay, maybe practicing can wait a little bit more,” whispered Timothée, his fingers knotting on Armie´s hair. He kissed Armie once again, this time a bit more urgent, rougher and rolled them over in the bed, straddling Armie´s lap. He sat down and pulled off Armie´s shirt, his hands sliding down to his muscular chest, fingers knotting on his chest hair. Timothée smiled and removed his own shirt, watching Armie´s eyes travel down his body with love and lust.

“I´m so lucky to have you.” Armie pulled him down again, kissing him deeply, getting lost in the scent and taste of Timothée. 

 

********

 

Timothée left the bathroom with a hand deep inside his boxers, scratching himself as he squinted his eyes, taking in the light that surrounded his small brickered apartment. He yawned, his legs lazily moving to the fire escape where Armie was sitting, black t-shirt and boxers and a mug of coffee in his hands. Timothée couldn´t help but smile at the sight, Armie in his apartment, looking so at home was making him feel happy, complete.

He leaned against the window frame, crossing his arms as Armie looked at him over his shoulder, a wide smile on his lips. "Do you have any idea how many nights I spent alone in this apartment, thinking of the day I would have you here not just for a quick fuck, but because you wanted to be here more than anywhere else in the world...because this was somehow your home too"

Armie stood his hand out, his fingers intertwining with Timothée´s as soon as their hands touched. He pulled Timothée to him and watched as the brunette sat down in between his legs, leaning his head against Armie´s chest. “This is my home, Timmy, because you are my home”

Timothée closed his eyes and let out a contentment sigh. His whole body tingled while Armie wrapped his strong arms around him, his lips placing a long kiss on his cheeks. “I don´t think you´ll ever understand what I feel for you, Armie. I don´t think you´ll ever know just how painful it was to me to end things with you, because I never wanted that to happen”

“I know that, Timmy, neither one of us wanted that to happen, but it had to. I wasn´t the man you deserved back then and I still don´t think I am the man you deserve now, but I am working towards it”

Timothée shook his head, turning around so he could look at Armie. He cradled his face, slim thumbs rubbing on Armie´s cheeks as he smiled, feeling his eyes water. There was a swirl of emotions taking him over at that moment, Armie was there, they were together, things were finally going down the path he had always dreamt of.

“You are everything I need, Armie, flaws and all,” mumbled Timothée, pulling Armie close to him. He placed a soft kiss on his pink lips, hands sliding up to Armie´s hair, tugging lightly on it. “Just remember I love you the way you are and you should never change”

“Thank you”

Timothée arched an eyebrow. “For what?”

“For being you, for loving me and supporting me. You changed my life and there´s not one day that I don´t thank God, and Luca, for allowing us to be in each other´s lives”

Timothée shook his head, leaning his forehead against Armie´s. “The way I see it, we would have found a way to come together. It was meant to be, you and me against the world”

Armie nodded. “You and me against the world”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I know it´s been a while, but if I am being honest I am having some trouble with this fic. I got everything worked out, all the plot sketched for me, but it´s taking me longer than expected to work on the chapters and I just don´t think I´m on the right mindset of this story right now. What I am trying to say is that chapters might come a little slower for this one, but they are still gonna come, hope you guys understand and stick around to see where our boys are going.


	22. My Own Remorse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Timothée and Armie have a nice Sunday morning together, but when Jason shows up at the same restaurant as they are, Armie decides it´s time to get some things sorted out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for understanding and being patient, I won´t abandon this fic, I love her too much for that, I just need to be a bit more patient with it. :D

Central Park was filled with people, the warm and sunny Sunday encouraging people to leave their apartments and spend some much needed time outdoors, enjoying the breeze and the company of their loved ones. There were kids running around, families gathered around their food baskets, lovers stealing kisses against the trees and the most athletic people, jogging around the lake.

To Armie and Timothée being together out in the open seemed like a bittersweet experience. They were glad to be able to be there with one another without an entire entourage -like it normally happened when they were doing promo-, but the fact they couldn't reach out and touch, kiss and hug was painful and sad.

They were both aware the secrecy of their relationship was extremely important at the moment, as far as everyone was concerned Armie was still a straight married man and neither one of them wanted to do things in a rush. Armie needed time to get used to the new life he would have, Elizabeth had to let the idea of the divorce settle down and Timothée surely didn´t want to be seen as the homewrecker, although a part of him really believed in that.

They both stared at a couple near them, two guys lying on the grass, one with his head resting on the other´s stomach and with a wide smile on his face. Timothée bit on his lip, his body involuntary moving closer to Armie, his hand almost burning with the need to feel Armie´s touch.

“One day,” said Armie with a little smile on his face. He watched as Timothée turned to him, arching an eyebrow and chuckled, motioning towards the couple with his chin. “We´re gonna get that one day soon, I promise you.”

“You don´t have to promise me anything, Armie. I am well aware of how difficult things can be and I don´t want you to feel pressured to come out just so we can show any type of affection, I´m okay with what we got.”

“No, you´re not.”

“Yes, I am.”

“No, you´re not,” he said once again as Timothée sighed. “And I know that because I am not okay with this situation, I want to hold you, to kiss you and let the whole world know I am lucky enough to date Timothée Chalamet.”

Timothée chuckled, elbowing Armie on the ribs with a smirk on his face. “I want everyone to know I am with you too, but I also know that right now this is not really an option. You need to sort out your divorce first, then we´ll let people know, okay? I want to do things the right way.”

“Part of me knows this is the right to do, but there's a part of me who just wants to run around screaming how much I want you.”

“Oh God, please don´t do that, that´s just embarrassing.”

Armie feigned hurt, clinging into his heart as Timothée chuckled. “I think it´s quite romantic, actually.”

“Of course you do, you´re old.”

“Excuse me?”

“You´re old, dude, accept it.”

“Well, this old man here still can give you quite a hard time in bed, or did you forget how you were moaning my name like a mad man last night?"

Timothée could feel his cheeks flush as he looked up at Armie, tucking his hands in his pockets and swaying his body side to side. “I...I really don´t have an answer for that.”

“Don´t worry, I promise to make you scream even more later today,” he teased and laughed as Timothée turned bright head, his eyes scanning their surroundings. “No one is hearing us, Timmy, chill out.”

“You can never be too careful, Armie.” Armie nodded, his blue eyes piercing through him, making him feel shivers down his spine. “Before we get a bit too caught up in this joke, why don´t we go eat something?”

“I know a great hot dog stand around the corner,” Armie joked as Timothée rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, why don´t you let the New Yorker take care of that?”

“Whatever you want, babe, whatever you want.”

  
  


******

 

The restaurant was small but well decorated, with a great selection of drinks, which clearly pleased Armie and the food was one of the best Timothée had ever had the pleasure to eat. His father was the one who first discovered the place, taking the entire family after it and creating a little routine to go there on the Sundays they didn´t feel like cooking.

Armie had never been there and was pleased to know there was still so many places he and Timothée could explore together, places that meant something to the brunette and that now would also mean something to him. Places they could start building their own story, their memories.

Timothée had ordered a Caesar Salad and grilled chicken, while Armie went for the usual steak. The lack of people on the restaurant gave them the opportunity to have this small moments of intimacy they had been craving for most of the morning. A quick touch of their fingers, legs intertwined under the table, light squeezes on each other´s knees, long stares and smiles.

Conversation went easy too, they still had so much to share about the months they spent apart, all the pain and struggles, how hard they both tried to move on and how no matter what they did, late at night it was always about the each other they dreamt of. Armie tried to shed some light on how exactly things were going with his divorce, what his lawyer had said and what were his biggest fears throughout the whole process. Timothée listened to all with careful attention, he wanted to make sure he knew exactly what was going, because that was the only way he could truly help Armie get through it all.

"...about that whole thing with the kids?"

"He told me not to worry about anything right now, but make sure Elizabeth and I are doing everything as friendly as possible, because that would help me a lot."

Timothée sighed, his fingers brushing against Armie´s. "I know it´s hard not to get drawn by the negative stuff, but you need to find a way to remember you are such an amazing dad, Armie and everyone will see it. Besides, no matter how mad Elizabeth is, I highly doubt she would try to keep you from seeing the kids."

"I don´t know, when she finds out about us she is gonna be pissed and then..."

Timothée arched an eyebrow. "And then what?"

"Then there´s my mom, who is even staying with her for the last couple of days and I can´t even imagine the things she must be telling her. My mother never wanted to get a divorce, Timmy, she fought my dad until she was completely drained, until she did not have strength to do anything."

"You think she could encourage Elizabeth to make things a bit harder for you?"

"Either that or she will get the job done herself."

"Armie, she is your mom, she wouldn´t do anything to hurt you. Not like this."

Armie shrugged, messing around with the food on his plate. "I have reached a point where I can easily expect everything from her. I know it´s not nice to hear, but after we last saw each other, the way she looked at me, how she doesn´t care about what I want... I´ve lost all my expectations of us ever having a good, healthy mother and son relationship, Timmy. I´ll always love her, of course, but..."

"Hey, it´s okay, you two will be fine." They smiled at each other, but soon Armie´s eyes got lost on whatever was going on behind Timothée. The brunette arched an eyebrow, watching as Armie´s expression turned into a much more awkward one and turned around on his chair, biting his lip as he saw Jason walking in with a friend.

"Well, this lunch got a lot more interesting now," mumbled Armie.

Timothée waved slightly at Jason, who simply nodded and then turned back to Armie. "We can make this work, it doesn´t have to be weird or uncomfortable."

"It´s already uncomfortable, Timmy, and he is sitting facing me, so it will be quite the staring contest from now on."

Timothée rolled his eyes. "Then don´t look at him, c´mon Armie, I am really trying to keep things nice with Jason..."

"Have you seen him again?"

"I ran into him at the grocery store the other day, we talked and it was actually really nice. Why?"

"Why didn´t you tell me?"

"Why didn´t you tell me you were going to have dinner with Elizabeth on Friday?"

"Because I wasn´t going to and...," Armie sighed, nodding his head as Timothée gave him a smile."Okay, I got it."

"I told you I didn´t want to lose Jason´s friendship, Armie. Since I´ve met him, he has been nothing but a great friend to me, he supported me and never judged me for going out with you. I was a dick to him, he is willing to make our friendship work and I don´t want to waste that, so please, please try to understand the situation."

"I am sorry, okay? I promise I won´t get in between your friendship."

"Thank you."

They smiled at one another and then resumed to their food, Timothée trying his best to ignore the fact Jason was there, watching as he and Armie spent time together, watching as they tried to be the couple they so badly wanted to be. It made him feel extremely bad with himself, but he also knew there was not much he could do. He was only trying to be happy.

He looked up as he saw Armie get up and arched an eyebrow. "Where you are going?"

"To the bathroom."

Timothée gave him a quick nod, but then instantly turned around, watching as Jason disappeared on the hallway that led to the bathrooms. Timothée quickly reached for Armie´s hand, pulling him back and for once not even bothering if people could see it or not. 

"You are not going after him, Armie."

"I am going to the bathroom."

"No, you are not. You are gonna try to talk to him and it´s gonna be a mess, so please, sit down and just finish your food."

"Don´t you trust me, Timothée?"

"Armie..." He sighed and let go of Armie´s hand, Timothée knew him enough to know once he got something inside his head, it was nearly impossible to get him to back down. "Please, don´t make anything stupid."

Armie smiled down at Timothée and squeezed his shoulder before quickly heading to the bathroom. He got in, leaned against the sink and waited until Jason made it out of one of the stalls. They stared at each other for a quick second, both completely silent and unsure of what to do next. Not really in the mood for games, Jason rolled his eyes and walked over to the sink, washing his hands while Armie stood there.

"You want to make out with me now?"

"Excuse me?"

"Last time you ambushed someone on a bathroom you tried to steal a kiss, wasn´t it? I happen to know because it was my boyfriend, you know, the guy you didn´t care about for three months and then decided you wanted back."

"That´s not true, Jason. Timothée was the one who ended things between us and the months I spent away from him, those were the worst moments of my life. I´m not gonna lie to you, I needed that to realize just how much he meant to me and how fake my current life was, but I never wanted to lose him, I never wanted to hurt him."

"But you did and I have a hard time believing you won´t do it again."

"I love him, Jason." 

"So much that you left him in the shadows for two years."

Armie sighed, nodding his head. "I was a fucking asshole to Timothée, I know that, you don´t have to tell me, but I had my own struggles too, okay? Do you have any idea how it is to grow up with people who think being the way you are is a sin? A whole family who won´t understand you, who will think you are an abomination? As far as I´m concerned you grew up in a great family, who supported you no matter what."

"Poor rich guy. The fact your family might not accept you, Armie, does not give you the right to be an asshole to other people, specially not to the person you claim to love."

"Jason, I love him and I am trying my best every single day to be a better man, for him, for my kids and for myself. I know the two of us will never get along, but Timothée really wants you in his life, he cherishes the friendship you two had and I don´t want our problems to get in between that."

"He is the problem between us, Armie. If what you say is true, we both are in love with the same man and he..."

"And he might have hurt you, he might have disappointed you, but he cares about you more than you can imagine and I would hate myself if your friendship didn´t work because him and I are together. The both of us, we don't need to have a relationship, we don´t even have to like each other, but let´s just try to be respectful...for Timothée."

"Did he ask you to come here?"

"He tried to stop me, actually."

"Because you have no filter." Jason watched as Armie arched an eyebrow and sighed. "Like you said, we had a good friendship and before we started dating he would tell me everything about you guys. I was the person he ran to when he needed to rant, to let out his frustrations."

"Then try to forget how much you might hate me and be there for him if he needs."

Jason kept himself quiet for a while, his mind racing and his heart beating faster. He hated this situation and hated himself for feeling so vulnerable after hearing everything Armie said. "You don´t deserve someone like him, Armie."

"I know that."

 

******

 

Armie followed Timothée down the hallway, the silence between them now almost too much for him to bear. He watched as Timothée unlocked the door and followed him inside, holding onto his hand before he could walk away. Armie pulled Timothée close, tucked a few curls behind his ear and gave him a small smile.

"All this silence because of what happened at lunch?"

"All this silence because for the last hour I´ve been trying to figure out what the hell you said to Jason."

"Don´t you have any faith on me?"

Timothée sighed, his hands rubbing on Armie´s arms, squeezing his biceps. "You know I love and trust you, but I also know that sometimes you have absolutely no filter, you just say things and that might hurt some people."

"Didn´t I tell you that I wouldn't get in between your friendship with him? I´m gonna keep that promise."

"Then tell me what did you guys talk about."

"At first I was going to apologize, but then I realized that no matter what I said it wouldn´t matter. Jason was the most affected by this whole thing, by us being together and he has all the right to be mad at both of us, so I figured the best thing to do was to just...just tell him that we shouldn´t let our differences get in between your friendship."

"And why did you do that?"

"Because I want to see you happy and I know having at least a decent relationship with Jason is important to you. Am I forgiven?"

Timothée smiled. "There´s nothing to forgive, Armie, I was just worried."

"I know and I understand why." He leaned down, placing a soft kiss on Timothée´s lips and pulled his body closer to his. He felt Timothée´s arms wrap around his neck and smiled, picking him up in his arms while he walked over to the bed.

"I´m sorry if I made you think I don´t trust you."

"Sometimes I don´t even trust myself." They chuckled and lied down on the bed, Timothée´s head resting on Armie´s chest, his fingers tracing his arm. "In other news, I have nothing schedule for later tonight, what you say we cook something and get a nice little date night."

"Date night? That sounds good, apart from the part I´m gonna have to cook."

"Then I´ll do the cooking and you can chop the vegetables."

"I rather work on some nice drinks, but whatever."

"Drinks? Do you wanna get me drunk, Chalamet?"

Timothée smirked, rolling on top of Armie, his hands sliding inside his shirt, his fingers curling on his chest hair. "Not a bad idea, but I´d rather have you very sober so we can enjoy the night a little bit better. Where are your ropes, Hammer?"

"Oh, so this is what you have in mind for tonight?"

"I´ve been waiting way too long for you to bring them back, figured I had to do some begging."

Armie rolled them over, hovering on top of Timothée, his hand sliding down to his crotch, tugging on it slightly. "I would love to hear you begging, babe."

"Should we start now?" Timothée watched as Armie jumped out of the bed and laughed. He leaned against the bedpost, bit on his lip and watched as Armie looked around his things, his entire body already burning up at the anticipation. Oh how happy he was to have Armie back into his life.

 


	23. Good for You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Armie gives Timothée his present.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for being so patient with this one, I´m struggling it, but still writing it. :)  
> Tittle is from Selena Gomez´s song Good for You, which kind of fits this chapter very well.

The water runs down their naked body, the sound of their heavy breathing filling the air. Timothée´s wet curls clouded his vision, but that was something he didn´t need at that moment, he knew every single inch of Armie´s body by heart and knew exactly what to do to make him feel good. He had a hand tugging tightly onto Armie´s wet hair, his lips attached to his shoulder, sucking and biting while his other hand slowly stroked Armie´s cock.

Armie was leaned against the tile walls, his head leaned against Timothée´s wet hair as he let low moans escape him. His hands wandered through Timothée´s wet body, squeezing his ass and pulling their bodies even more closer than they already were. The touch of their feverish and wet skin rubbing against one another was on the most erotic things Armie could think of and each time Timothée´s teeth dragged around his skin, he could feel his cock twitch and leak.

Timothée could feel Armie´s entire body react to his ministrations, every single hair stand up in excitement, every throb of his cock and his moans, low and melodic. He looked up at Armie, his wet tongue tracing his jaw and cheeks before he devoured his lips, kissing him hungry.

The moment Timothée started leaving kisses down his chest and stomach Armie had to take deep breaths to keep his anticipation at bay. He was enjoying things a little bit too much and if he went on like this, things would be done way too quickly. Armie grabbed a fistful of Timothée´s hair the second he felt his cock enter his mouth, the warm cavity embracing him and the wet tongue swirling around his swollen head had him going crazy. He guided Timothée´s pace, going from fast and rough to slow and gentle, watching with glassy eyes as Timothée´s lips stretched out to take him whole.

Timothée´s knees hurt as he kneeled on the tile floor, his mouth stretched out too much and the water running from the shower didn´t really make things easy, but God was he loving every single second of this. He moaned around Armie´s cock each time the grip on his hair tightened and he was yanked back and forth on the shaft, feeling his own cock get painfully hard as Armie used his mouth as he wished.

"Get up, I need you right now."

Timothée got up with shaky legs, his body trembling as Armie grabbed on his ass and pulled him up and against the wall. His legs wrapped around Armie´s hips and his arms around his neck, their lips locking in a sloppy kiss as Armie entered him.

Their moans echoed and their bodies started moving, Timothée trying his best to stay steady as Armie started increasing his pace, his cock being buried to the hilt inside of him, only to be almost completely retreated seconds later.

"Fuck, you feel so good, babe."

Timothée nibbled on his ear, his nails scratching Armie´s back. "Fuck me harder, Armie."

  
  


*******

 

Being on a theater, experiencing the thrill of starting out work on his first Broadway show was quite a surreal thing for Armie. Everything was so new and exciting, but at the same time so big and terrifying, there were moments he felt like a little kid, overwhelmed by emotions, scared about taking a step further into the unknown. The first meeting of the cast on the theater had turned out better than he expected, everyone was very friendly and after the one dinner they all had together, he had already become close to Josh, who seemed like a really laid back guy.

He was also in his first Broadway show and that kind of helped Armie feel a little bit at ease with the whole situation, he wasn't alone in this, he wasn't the only newbie and if he did mess up, he at least would have someone else to turn to and talk about it. Timothée had tried to make him feel better, to tell him how it was completely understandable that he was nervous, because it meant he cared, it mean this was important to him. He was absolutely right, but Armie would rather this whole situation to be a little less terrifying.

A part of him new that one of the reasons why he was so scared was mainly because his life was changing in every single aspect, he was getting a divorce, he was starting out a relationship with a man, he was going through a new challenge in his career. Everything was happening at once and no matter how happy he was, it seemed like at any moment things could collapse. 

His phone rang the second he made it out of the stage, he quickly reached for it and smiled as he heard Timothée´s voice fill his ears. “Hey, I hope I didn't interrupt you.”

“You never interrupt.”

“Are you guys still working?”

“Gonna take a break now, have some lunch with the guys and then we´re coming back to talk some more, get some details with the director. What are you doing?”

“I'm gonna go meet Will in awhile, I think we´re gonna have lunch together and then Brian and I are gonna talk about some of the roles I might be interested in.” There was excitement on Timothée´s voice, the kind that overtook him whenever he started talking about work. “But I promise you I´ll be all yours tonight.”

“Good, cause I think it might be time for me to give you your little present.”

“What present are...oh, you mean that thing I asked you to bring with you?”

Armie chuckled, his eyes were beaming and it was easy to see just how happy he actually was. “That present, you up for it?”

“If you are, so am I.”

“Can´t wait for it.”

“You? I´ll be the one getting the show, I am feeling myself harden already.”

“Easy there, save it for tonight.”

Timothée laughed, a sound that no matter how many times he heard, would always make Armie smile. “I gotta go now, but I hope you are having fun there and that maybe you have calmed down a bit more.”

“I'm still quite scared about all of this, but yeah, I´ve calmed down a little bit.”

“Good, soon you´ll realize there's no reason to worry.”

“I hope so. Go have some fun, I´ll see you later. Love you.”

Josh was beside Armie the moment he hung up the phone, looking up at him with a side smile. “Your wife?”

Armie looks down at him, he wants to say no, he wants to say it's Timothée, his boyfriend, but he knows better than this. He simply nods his head, tucking his hands in his pockets and biting on his lower lip, forcing himself to remain quiet.

“My wife follows her and she loves the stuff she posts, she also finds you two quite cute and is looking forward to meeting you both.”

“That's great to hear.” Armie hated to lie to someone like this, he hated the fact he still had to pretend to live a very happy and perfect life with Elizabeth when that wasn't the case. Hell, he hated to portrait that perfect life when he was happy with her, let alone now. “Hope we can make that work some time soon.”

“Me too, I think they could be good friends.”

Armie nodded, the fake smile he had been mastering for years taking over his face. How long would it take for him to be able to open himself up to people? How long until he finally admitted to the world who he really was and who he loved? The happier he got with Timothée, the harder it became to keep up with his fake life.

  
  


*******

  
  


Armie sat down on the floor of his quiet and somehow still strange bedroom. He had rented that apartment a few months back, made sure it fitted everything Elizabeth wanted -or demanded- in a house, but he had never spent more than a two hours inside the place. He bought it mostly through Nick, then made a quick visit with Elizabeth to make sure the furniture and everything else was in order and now that he was in fact in New York, he was spending way more time at Timothée´s place than his own. To be honest, Timothée´s home felt much more like home to him than anywhere else in the world.

He had his phone in his hand, looking around the place while he waited and waited. When Elizabeth finally appeared on the screen, her makeup perfectly done as always and her hair neatly pushed back in a braided ponytail, Armie tried his best to smile, it was small and tamed, but it was honest. He didn't hate her, he wanted her happy, he wanted their relationship to go on as smoothly as possible. They had two kids together and she would always be part of his life, he would always love her for bringing them into the world and being there for him when he first started his career.

“Well look at that, did you remember you have kids?”

Clearly she wasn't on the same page as he was.

“What are you talking about?”

“You left and completely forgot about Hops and Ford.”

“I´ve been here for three days, Elizabeth. And I spent Friday with them, do you remember that? It was the day you and my mother tried to force me to change my mind about our divorce.”

“I didn't do anything, Armie. Dru was the one who decided to talk to you, tried to get some sense in your head and make you realize the mistake you are doing.”

Armie sighed, closing his eyes as he tried to keep himself calm. “One day you´ll realize our divorce was the best thing we could have done, Elizabeth.” Armie watched as she rolled her eyes and sighed, knowing it was futile to try and get some sense into her head at this point. “Can I talk to them?”

“Yes, I am gonna call them.”

Armie patiently waited, watching as Elizabeth became out of sight and then walked back with both Harper and Ford trailing behind. Armie smiled, this time a proper, face eating smile that made his cheeks hurt; only his kids and Timothée could bring that smile out, only them could bring the real Armie to the surface, an Armie who didn't care as much about what people thought of him, a happier and more confident Armie.

“Daddy!”

“Oh I miss you so much, Hops.” He said as Harper practically shoved her face on the computer camera, sending big kisses to him as he chuckled. “Miss you too, big boy.”

He chuckled, watching as the little girl stepped aside to make sure her father could see her little brother. He watched as Ford moved a bit closer, his usual quiet self waving as Harper messed with his hair, his clothes and poked his belly. Armie let out a sigh of contentment, seeing his kids after the last two days made him feel complete, full of love and joy, the only way to make this any better was to have Timothée on his side.

“Daddy, when are you coming back?”

Armie could hear Elizabeth scoff on the background and sighed, trying his best to push that aside and just focus on his kids. “I am gonna stay here for a while, sweetie, but mommy is gonna bring you two here soon and we'll have a great time together, okay?”

“Will uncle Timmy be there too?”

“Of course he will, Hops.”

“Yay!”

Armie chuckled, watching as Elizabeth rolled her eyes and walked away from the screen. He couldn't help but find her sudden annoyance with Timothée strange, but he knew there was no way she could suspect of anything. She would only find out the truth through his own lips.

“So, tell me how was your weekend, did you do anything fun?”

 

******

 

The apartment was mostly dark and low music was playing as Timothée walked around the kitchen, placing plates and glasses on the counter and lightning the candles just as the front door opened. Timothée ran over to the door, taking Armie´s hands in his and leading him to the kitchen, making him sit down on a stool.

“What is all of this?”

“You said you were going to give me my present tonight, so I thought we could start with me preparing a nice meal for you.”

“You hate cooking, Timmy.”

“Who said anything about cooking? I ordered everything, but made sure to set a nice table and buy some good wine.”

Armie chuckled, leaning in to place a kiss on his lips. “I love you and your honesty.”

“I have no reason to lie to you or pretend to be someone I am not. You know my best and my worst already, there's nothing left to hide.”

“And I love every single thing about you, the bad, the good and the great. You have no idea how good it is to come back home to find you. I stopped by the apartment today and that place feels so strange to me, so unnatural...but being here with you, being inside this apartment, this is my home, you are my home.”

Timothée couldn't help but smile wide, his fingers intertwining with Armie´s and their eyes locked. “You have no idea how great it is to have you here with me, to finally be able to hold you and have you around all the time, no sloppy seconds or rushed encounters.”

“Nothing between us has to be rushed from now on, I am here for good, we are together and nothing or no one can change that now.”

“Are you sure?”

Armie arched an eyebrow. “What?”

“Our careers and your family. I know I shouldn't worry, I know we have all the right to be happy and fight for that happiness, but there's this small part of me that can´t help but think that something will come up and try to…”

“Stop,” Armie placed his hands on Timothée´s face, rubbing his cheeks and smiling softly at him. “People can try to break us, our careers might go through a tough period, but the only way we are ever breaking up is if we decide to do so. Now, I don't know about you, but I have absolutely no intentions of letting go of you, not now, not ever.”

Timothée got up, rushing over to Armie and wrapping his arms around his neck, kissing him deeply. Armie smiled, pulling Timothée in between his legs and holding tight onto his waist, deepening the kiss until they were flushed and breathless.

“Shouldn't we eat?”

Timothée nodded, giving one more short kiss before he made his way around the counter and took the food out of the oven. He placed it all on the counter, smiling as Armie leaned closer, taking in the smell. “Did I choose well?”

“Always.”

 

*******

  
  


Armie was beautiful and Timothée knew that well enough, yet he would never get over the sight of a naked Armie on the bed, performing the most amazing -and arousing- show for him. His dream was nothing compared to the real thing, a sweaty, panting and flushed Armie with his back leaned against the bedpost, his eyes closed tight, his legs parted, one hand working the dildo in and out of him, while the other stroked his cock in perfect synchrony.

In the quiet night, Armie´s moans, sobs and whimpers filled the air while Timothée sat on the far end of the bed, pink lips swollen from biting and sucking on it, body tender from arousal and hand vigorously working on his throbbing cock. Precum leaked from the sensitive head, his fingers teased his slit and his balls and when he closed his eyes and let Armie´s obscene sounds fill his ears, he could feel every single muscle in his body spasm.

Armie´s moans got louder and more frequent, his body started to tremble and his head was thrown back, his teeth biting hard on his bottom lip. Timothée knew him enough to know this was it, he was about to cum and although until now he wanted to reenact his dream exactly as it was, there was no way Timothée would waste the opportunity to have Armie deep down his throat the moment he exploded.

He crawled over, pushed Armie´s hand away and let his tongue run across the whole length of the throbbing and slippery cock. He hummed as he tasted the precum on his tongue, feeling his own cock get painfully hard and ready to shoot. Timothée teased the head for a few seconds, swirling his tongue around it, running it across the slit and only when Armie couldn't take it anymore he wrapped his lips around the shaft and took it all in.

Armie arched his back, his free hand instantly knotting on Timothée´s curls and pushing him down, fucking his face fast and rough. His body was on the verge of a breakdown and his eyes were heavy, but Armie did all he could to keep them wide open and watch as Timothée´s cheeks puffed and drool run down his lips to his chin. It was an obscene sight, one he and Timothée loved and as he heard the younger man gag around his cock, Armie couldn't hold himself anymore.

Timothée watched from the corner of his eyes as Armie let go of the dildo, losing all the strength he had and in seconds he was coming, coating Timothée´s mouth with his thick and salty seed. Timothée moaned as he swallowed everything he could, playing with Armie´s balls as he did so. He smiled to himself and licked his lips before turning to Armie, who looked at him through glazed eyes.

“C-come here.”

Timothée crawled over Armie´s body and gasped as he felt Armie´s large hand wrap around his cock. He buried his face on the crook of his neck, his lips sucking and biting on the feverish flesh, his hands roaming all over Armie´s sweaty chest, fingers hooking on his chest hair and playing with his nipples. He moaned, fluttered and gasped, his orgasm hitting him hard as his cum covered both his and Armie´s stomach.

“Was it anything like your dream?” Armie pushed some of his hair back, smiling down at Timothée, who chuckled and closed his eyes, letting out a sigh of contentment.

“Much better than the dream.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Are you guys ready to fall in love with Jason? Cause I sure as hell did.  
> Comments and kudos are my fuel, so please hit that button and leave me some feedback.  
> [Follow Me On Tumblr](http://raquelsantos92.tumblr.com/)


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